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Sexual Harrassment in the workplace...(kinda long)

Original post by MrsERod

I was just put in the most awkard position.

There's this salesman at my job 'John' who realllly has it in for another salesman 'Dave' who recently started working here. I was stupid enough to share with John some of the phone conversation that I had with Dave, wherein Dave made a not so appropriate remark about my sex life. I really wasn't that offended by it, so I basically handled it by telling him it was none of his business and left it at that. Well, now John used this info (for his benefit) and went to his boss, who is also my boss (the Regional V.P.) and told him about the convo.
So now, my boss asked me to put it in writing...which I am not comfortable doing, because honestly, I don't feel like I was sexually harassed!! I did think the comment was inappropriate/none of his business and I told him so, but now I feel like John is using me in his quest against Dave, and that Pi$$es me off. I know I should've kept my mouth shut and not tell John about the phone convo. I had with Dave, but I honestly didn't think he'd use it as ammo against him!! What the hell do I do now???


ETA:

the conversation was about coupons for vitamin C that he offered me (because I was very sick last week)
and it basically went like this:

Dave: I sent you an email for a $2 coupon off of Vitamin E

Me: Vitamin E? I thought it was for Vitamin C?

Dave: Well that's what's on sale this week.

Me: Nah, thanks but no thanks. I'll wait for the Vitamin C

Dave: Well that's fine, but I guess you don't care about your sex life.

Me: Excuse me?

Dave: That's what its good for. Your skin, and your sex life.

Me: Well, I'd take it for my skin, and as for the other part, that's none of your business.

Dave: Ok, just letting you know.
Danielle Posted:

Re: Sexual Harrassment in the workplace...(kinda long)

Good for you! And good for your boss!! I am glad they are leaving it up to you!

Jen_n_Dale Posted:

Re: Sexual Harrassment in the workplace...(kinda long)

Good for you!!!!!
Niecey Posted:

Re: Sexual Harrassment in the workplace...(kinda long)

Posted by MrsERod

Ok..I just had a meeting with my boss. I told him exactly how I felt about the situation, and he was very understanding.
He said that ultimately what it boils down to is how the remark made ME feel and not what others feel/think. He left the ball totally in my park and said he'd back me up, whatever my decision. (my boss is great!) I told him that I didn't feel comfortable bringing it to the level that John would like, and that I am very upset that John would try and use me in his quest against Dave. My boss agreed. I also told him that although I do feel the comment was unprofessional and inappropriate, I in no way felt harrassed. Now he's having another meeting with John, so we'll see what happens.



I am glad this worked out for you. I was in a very similar situation. I woman at my office one time said her boss sexually harassed me 9she was trying to prove her own claim and use me since I was one of the few 'younger woman in the office). I never felt he did. I went to my boss and said I was not comfortable with the situation. I never wanted a complaint. Not only does the record of a complaint go on the person who is doing the harrassment but on yours. I did not want to be associated with that at all. It is all about how the comments make you feel. I have rec'd so many inappropriate comments in my office but none that made me feel that uncomfortable to do my job. I just learned to tell people - that is very inappropriate and it usually ends it.
MrsERod Posted:

Re: Sexual Harrassment in the workplace...(kinda long)

I was just called into my bosses office.

John was there too, and he apologized profusely and promised to never put me in such a position ever again. He said he let his heated emotions get the better of him, and that it was like he had try to use me as a grenade in his attack against Dave. I told him I appreciate the apology. My boss was totally on my side, and even made it perfectly clear to John that whatever grievance he has with Dave, to try and handle it professionally without involving anyone else! I'm so glad this worked out the way it did.
Thanks everyone, for letting me vent and for giving me advice/support!!! you guys are great!!
jantany26 Posted:

Re: Sexual Harrassment in the workplace...(kinda long)

Posted by MrsERod

I was just called into my bosses office.

John was there too, and he apologized profusely and promised to never put me in such a position ever again. He said he let his heated emotions get the better of him, and that it was like he had try to use me as a grenade in his attack against Dave. I told him I appreciate the apology. My boss was totally on my side, and even made it perfectly clear to John that whatever grievance he has with Dave, to try and handle it professionally without involving anyone else! I'm so glad this worked out the way it did.
Thanks everyone, for letting me vent and for giving me advice/support!!! you guys are great!!


I'm glad everything worked out Christina.
Butterflybride Posted:

Re: Sexual Harrassment in the workplace...(kinda long)

It's only sexual harrassment if it offends you, which it didn't, so I think you should object to filling out that paper.

MrsERod Posted:

Re: Sexual Harrassment in the workplace...(kinda long)

John just came by my desk and offered to buy me lunch, part of his apology I guess!
I told him thank you, but that I had lunch already!! JERK!...now he's just feeling so guilty.

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