Should I invite....????

My brother's inlaws...namely my brother's:
- MIL
- FIL
- SIL
- SIL's husband
- BIL
- BIL GF (mostly like soon to be FI

Here's the scoop. I know technically these people are not related to me in any sort of way other than they are the inlaws of my brother BUT we do a lot of family holiday stuff together. Not that they necessarily come to my family's events but when my brother/SIL host an event or holiday at their house, they are always there (pretty much every holiday). So we do spend quite a bit of time with them. They all know FH so it's not like they've never met him.

I had asked my brother and he said it was not necessary but the thing is at Easter this past weekend the first thing my brother's SIL said was 'So you're coming up on the one year mark soon?' and then said she 'Tell me you can't wait to see the little guy in a tux' (speaking about my nephew, the RB). So then we got into a discussion about the wedding.

I just feel very awkward if I didn't send them an invite. Personally, I think if any of them would come it would be his SIL/SIL Husband. His FIL/MIL would probably watch my nephew that night after the church because he's not coming to the RH.

To make matters worse, I wouldn't even consider inviting his BIL/GF because we hardly see them and I don't talk to them much when we do see them but then I feel like a douche for inviting everyone but them.

Sorry soooooooo LONG but if you gotten this far, what would you do...

Invite them all?
Invite none of them?

i'm having the same problem...

i've been going back and forth, not really sure what to do~

My FH has two sisters. I am inviting both of their in-laws and their siblings. even though we won't be related they all went to everyone else's wedding so they will come to mine.
i just feel an invite should be sent as well. if they chose to accept ot not will be on them but they can say they were invited...

I am inviting my brother's in laws -- we do every thanksgiving with their family. I see them more than I see some members of my own family (because my family is scattered across of the country).

We are inviting my brother's... MIL, FIL, BIL and wife, the grandma, 1 aunt (she's unmarried) -- another aunt with her husband (no kids)... so that would be 8 people. I anticipate that only 6 will come though.

If you end up inviting your brother's in-laws family, I think the 'right thing to do' is to invite the BIL/GF. It will avoid any awkwardness.

HTH!!

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Posted by allornil

Id invite them, especially if you see them at holidays.

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ITA.. they might be offended if you spend holidays together and they aren't invited.

we are inviting my sister's MIL, FIL, and BIL

Personally, I wouldn't. I know for a fact you already have a bigggggg guest list and I know you want to keep it at or around your minimum. So, I vote no invite. Sorry bro's in-laws!

Besides, it'd be a little like you guys inviting my parents! And they don't expect that. LOL!

I'm not really sure.

I do know however that when all my aunts/uncles got married ...and even my parents.

The MIL/FIL were ALWAYS invited - not the SIL/BIL/Any other IL.

They all invited MIL/FIL out of respect but didn't invite everyone else because it got to be too many people.

Someone told me that as soon as you get engaged everyone wants to be invited to the wedding..and you (the bride) will feel guilty if you dont invite THE WHOLE WORLD. When I started writing my list, I listed all the people who I was extremely close to (direct family, forever friends, some co workers) as the A List and then I had the B List (indirect family, like random cousins or OOT family who may not make it, pseudo friends and the other co workers) and the C list (everyone else).

At the end of the day, you have to think, when you first started writing your list, did you even think about your brothers' in-laws? If not, dont feel guilty that you're not inviting them. Of course everyone wants to be there for your big day but will they make your day any more special? will you feel better if they are there?

Good Luck :)

Thanks everyone for the advice! I am definitely going to think about this a little longer... I'm most likely not going to send them a STD but when it comes down to sending the invites I will make my decision then.

My mother even said that she doesn't think we need to invite them... I know I really shouldn't feel guilty but that's just my nature. And we really do want to keep our guestlist a close to the minimum as possible and it's pretty much at the max I want it at right now without inviting 6 more people.

I am inviting both my brother's in laws. I don't see them that often, but my parent's want me to invite them out of respect. I'm fine with that though since my family is small we have the room for a few extras.

Edited: when I say in law I mean only the MIL and FIL, none of the siblings will be invited.

If you send a save the date to them, you really should invite them. IMO it's rude to send STD. and not an invite.

We are inviting FH's brother's inlaws. They do holidays together; we see them often, and they have been a part of Fh's life for like 13 years.