So FED UP with FH!! A little long - sorry...

So - I have to vent...
My FH is a HUGH football fanatic - and to an extent so am I... but lately it's gotten out of hand - he's joined THREE fantasy football leagues - two of which were over $100 to join (this he didn't tell me until he said he needed two checks for the amount on the day of the 'draft' ) and recently purchased Madden '08... I normally don't have a problem with the Madden game - but now that he's in these 'leagues' practically ALL of his time is spent on the computer or on the phone with his draft buddies figuring out the next 'strategic' move in his league...
Yes, I spend an exorbitant amount of time on my computer - usually work related... but when he's home, I try to make it a point to NOT ignore him... but for him it doesn't matter... he'll play Madden for hours on end - but when I mention that it's a beautiful day out - let's go outside, take the dogs out, etc... he either ignores me, continues to play or gets bent out of shape telling me all I do is complain about him playing video games...
I never really cared in the past - since I was going thru the tenure process at my school - I had little time away from the computer - and he understood - so he played video games... but now - I have tenure - a LOT less stress is there and much less time on the computer on my end... but he is still the same.
I've tried talking to him about it - but he becomes SO defensive and accusatory...
We are in financial lock down b/c of this wedding - so we are trying to do as much as possible that doesn't cost money - but he still does what he wants - financially (while EVERY last cent of mine is put toward the f'ing wedding)... but I'm the P.I.T.A. b/c I am getting tired of seeing the back of his head...

Ladies I don't know what to do anymore... I am SO fed up with this cr@P... I'm ready to toss that f'ing xbox console out the f'ing window...



Thanks for 'listening'...

im sorry you have to deal with that. my FH just had his dumb football draft today, not to mention he has a $500 super bowl box already, and is in another football pool. its alot of money. and he is obsessed with football also. i feel like im always saying this, but........ i guess its a guy thing, you arent alone, and feel better!!!

are you talking about your FH or mine????????????? they are a spitting image of each other!!!!! my FH is also in three leagues but he's also on a Madden league too. I just bought him guitar hero II for our 2 year anniversary....but I guess I feel like he is sooo cute when he plays games so i;m not at the point where i care much. just that i couldn't do wedding stuff b/c of a draft or some scrimage things...i dont' even know what he's talking about half the time.

i'm sure a lot of girls on here can relate!!

Oh god i know EXACTLY what you are talking about...with FH its baseball and football...for baseball he was on about 4-5 fantasy leagues, BUT he also plays for 4 softball teams so he plays a few times during the week, although championships were last week so its over, and on sundays he plays 2 games in the morning and then 2 more at night, and not to mention that are teams are always calling him to play if they are short . He also always watches sports...so hes either on the computer doing his fantasy teams, watching it or playing it. INFACT, this labor day weekend FH is in oceancity maryland, playing in a big softball tournament which he has been playing in every year for a long time. And yes softball is finally done after this weekend but i know FH will join snowflake leagues like he always does, which means he will play until the middle of november. Then after that he'll join football leagues and play, this year he said he wont play football but he said the same thing last year and still played, so lets see lol

I LOVE that he plays dont get me wrong, i think its good for him and i know how much he loves it...I even love going with him to games and watching him play but there are times like GRRRRR , for example since he played early sunday mornings we couldn't go out to places on sat and stay out late, but he would get us up early and do things all day but i would like to go out dancing at night...luckily snowflake is only during the week.

ooooh girlie i TOTALLY feel your pain!!!!!!!!!!!! Now when i wanna go DO something, I just say 'alright well then I'm gonna go enjoy the day then'.....9 times out of 10 he'll end up coming with me

OMG, FH is in 4 fantasy football leagues! I told him he better win because we could use the money. The worst part is that he is always on his computer checking the stats and the season hasnt even started yet! I love football myself but I cant even enjoy watching a game because he is routing for one guy on one team and the defense on the other! lol

I hope all of our FH's win big this year! That would the be the only good thing out of it!

I just had to laugh at your post because in essense, that is boys for ya! Mine does fantasy football every yr and this is actually the 2nd yr he is the commissoner of the league so yes he is extra involved with the process!

They will always always spend $$ on their toys/hobbies instead of where the money should really be going... Its just how they are and its a lost cause tryin to change their ways! Believe me! I've been there done that and am still doing that Its really nt even worth the aggravation in yelling b/c it doesnt do much... Sad, but true!

It'll all be over in 15 weeks... Thank god hes not in a fantasy baseball league... then you'd be screwed!

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Posted by LeslieMike

OMG, FH is in 4 fantasy football leagues! I told him he better win because we could use the money. The worst part is that he is always on his computer checking the stats and the season hasnt even started yet! I love football myself but I cant even enjoy watching a game because he is routing for one guy on one team and the defense on the other! lol

I hope all of our FH's win big this year! That would the be the only good thing out of it!

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yeah lets hope...he'll tell me the prizes and will say oh ill give the money to you towards the wedding(they know what to say) so im like Oh ok well good luck then...Fh also loves poker, and on thursday he played in a poker tournament with a $17,000 pot to the winner, i was like Oh yeah good go play lol, he did make the final table but then lost towards the end to his own friend he went with lol, his friend ended up getting out too. I told him ok so maybe you should enter poker tournaments more often

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Posted by FuTuRe MrS MaZz

I just had to laugh at your post because in essense, that is boys for ya! Mine does fantasy football every yr and this is actually the 2nd yr he is the commissoner of the league so yes he is extra involved with the process!

They will always always spend $$ on their toys/hobbies instead of where the money should really be going... Its just how they are and its a lost cause tryin to change their ways! Believe me! I've been there done that and am still doing that Its really nt even worth the aggravation in yelling b/c it doesnt do much... Sad, but true!

It'll all be over in 15 weeks... Thank god hes not in a fantasy baseball league... then you'd be screwed!

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lol well im screwed bc he does both and yeah its basically all year round when they do both, or at least it feels like it, actually i think it might be

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Posted by Espo22

lol well im screwed bc he does both and yeah its basically all year round when they do both, or at least it feels like it, actually i think it might be

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God help you!!! I would have strangled FH by now! And I think you may have 2 months off from sports (Feb-March to be exact)

I actually dont mind the football so much because I go to the bar on sundays during the seaon and watch the giants and jets games so I still get to spend time with him hehehe But the constant talking about players and teams can be quite annoying...

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Posted by Espo22

Oh wait and i forgot another BIG part of it...like i said hes either online doing fantasy teams, playing or watching BUT also he has trades forwarded to his phone if hes not around...so if someone offers him a trade and hes not home he can do it through his phone, so we'll be out and he'll get texts and its trades lol. OR ppl constantly call to ask him for his opinion about whether or not they should make a certain trade or that they want to offer a trade on fantasy and who would be a better choice.

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Hahahaa Yesssssss i know all too well about the texts on the phone... And the discussion of trades.. Its just unreal, but its good that he has a hobby!

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Posted by FuTuRe MrS MaZz

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Posted by Espo22

lol well im screwed bc he does both and yeah its basically all year round when they do both, or at least it feels like it, actually i think it might be

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God help you!!! I would have strangled FH by now! And I think you may have 2 months off from sports (Feb-March to be exact)

I actually dont mind the football so much because I go to the bar on sundays during the seaon and watch the giants and jets games so I still get to spend time with him hehehe But the constant talking about players and teams can be quite annoying...

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LOL yes and he plays both sports too so its non-stop lol...oh yeah i love it around february and march bc it is like WOO HOO no sports.

Yeah i dont mind most of the time...sunday nights i like it in the summer bc he plays for a league with alot of his friends and all the gf/wives/fiancee's or whatever lol all come down to the games so we all hang out watching our men play lol.

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Posted by FuTuRe MrS MaZz

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Posted by Espo22

Oh wait and i forgot another BIG part of it...like i said hes either online doing fantasy teams, playing or watching BUT also he has trades forwarded to his phone if hes not around...so if someone offers him a trade and hes not home he can do it through his phone, so we'll be out and he'll get texts and its trades lol. OR ppl constantly call to ask him for his opinion about whether or not they should make a certain trade or that they want to offer a trade on fantasy and who would be a better choice.

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Hahahaa Yesssssss i know all too well about the texts on the phone... And the discussion of trades.. Its just unreal, but its good that he has a hobby!

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Its insane, the first time he got a text about this i remember saying 'are you for real, you have them sent to your phone so you dont miss it' lol.

I agree, some ppl say to me, doesn't it drive you crazy but i am real glad he has a hobby...its also so good for them, FH's dad played sports until he was 55, infact FH even played on teams with his dad and they won 2 championships together. Its great when i see his dad so active, he still plays basketball with friends actually the funny thing is that his dad plays with alot of FH's friends so younger guys and EVERY time we see these guys they tell me and FH OMG your dad is crazy he slam dunked on me, or how you cant ever win an arguement in sports with him and i know FH loves hearing that and its good he is so active especially at that age...So i know this will go on for quite a long time, bc if his dad played until 55 years old so will Fh

well mine isnt into sports that much but he loves POKER! He will play and watch anytime anywhere!!

We were at my parents house last night for dinner and we had 2 cars well I stop to get gas and when I get home he has the tv on already watching poker!!!!!!!!!!

He had a patch where he went to foxwoods 4 weeks in a row!!!! No more of that now that we are living together again!!!

he is also big on 'forgetting his lunch' and then buying sushi or Thai for like $15!!! Meanwhile I SAVE SAVE SAVE!!!

i feel your pain!

that sounds like my dh... but he is in FOUR leagues... it is called being a football widow... did i mention that we have to have TWO TVs in our tiny den during football season, and we have to have both IO & direct TV so he can get all of the games... it drives me nuts, is an added expense that we dont need, but at least he is home on sundays and not out at his friends house... it drives me nuts and i cant stand it, but i have kinda learned to tolerate it a little bit... it makes him happy, so i try to look at it in a semi-positive way...

I may have you all beat!!

Three TV's in the living room, and a laptop. He runs his fantasy league which costs 500 a spot. He is in a few leagues online and he runs pools every Sunday. And has been playing Madden since he got it (The day it came out!) and has the new Tiger woods waiting in the bullpen when he is ready.

But you know what. I dont care. If that is the worst he does then so be it. It is 16 weeks of the year. He likes other sports but is not as fanatic.

If you feel he is spending money where he shouldnt, just give him one of the bills or the amount of money you think you need and tell him to come up with it.

As far as spending time, forget it on Sundays! I'll see you all at the mall! But he should make time some of the other days.

Good luck, Set the countdown to Superbowl Sunday next to the wedding coutdown clock.

My FH was soo addicted to online role playing games a few years back. He had scheduled times when his teams played., which happened to be about 6 nights a week.. We never saw each other, everytime I would try to make plans he would use the 'but i have a game tonight' crap. He wouldnt even call me most nights until 11 pm cause he would get home from work and have a game start at like 6 and if i would call him he would tell me hed call me during a 'break' which never came.. It was really aweful and lasted nearly 2 years. Most of his real friends didnt bother with him anymore since he always used the game as an excuse to not see them too. Me and him fought all the time about it. He never thought it was a big deal since its just a video game, 'what if i was playing hockey blah blah blah..' The worst part was he was really struggling with his finances and never had any money, but didnt bother getting a second job cause of this game (which he paid a monthly fee for). Finally I got so fed up with it all that I broke up with him.... The same day he was planning on proposing to me...

I guess at that point he realized that his life was falling apart, he had lost all of his friends, his girlfriend and was in a bad financial situation...

After that day he canceled the game subscription and a few months later I decided to give him a second chance.. He was a completely different person. We never fight and its almost like im with a different guy. Leaving him that day was the best decision I ever made.. however I did make him promise to never play another online game again.