I am so angry right now my blood is boiling. Everytime I ask him before I make an appt if thats a good day/time etc and everytime he complains. We have a florist appointment at 2pm and he's like 'I'm too tired I don't feel like going' So now we get into this huge fight and I feel like he doesn't care about the wedding. He is supposed to care about this stuff. I have been asking him forever can we sit down and do the guest list. He was supposed to do it with me last night and he didn't feel like it. Then he said we would do it today after the florist. Now he's saying he's too tired today and that once our wedding is less than a year away he will do everything. Our wedding is a year and one week away! I don't understand I am scared and afraid he doesn't want to marry me!
Its2Snappy
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Re: So pissed at FH
Aww. Some guys aren't as into the wedding planning. Don't let it get to you.
SummerGroom10
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Re: So pissed at FH
I'm sure you have nothing to worry about... Maybe he is just tired... I'm sure he wants to marry you or he wouldnt have asked....
A lot of guys want the brides to handle a lot of the stuff.. When I talk with other guys at work that are engaged they tell their FW's to plan it with their Moms and MIL's and they will just show up... It doesnt mean they dont care... It just means that they know, like I do but I go anyway, that what matters is what you want, and if you guys go and he makes a decision other than the one you like you'll argue till you get what you want... So rather than even go through it most guys like to just stay in the background....
Nichole2010
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Re: So pissed at FH
aww now i highly doubt he doesnt want to marry you....
he's probably just one of those guys that isnt big into planning a wedding, its time consuming and he probably doesnt understand how close it really is..
my FH is the biggest procrasinator in the world, and if it was up to him the wedding would be planned a week before!!
just talk to him and tell him thins like this take time!
marrymybestfriend
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Re: So pissed at FH
Posted by StaceYums81
I am so angry right now my blood is boiling. Everytime I ask him before I make an appt if thats a good day/time etc and everytime he complains. We have a florist appointment at 2pm and he's like 'I'm too tired I don't feel like going' So now we get into this huge fight and I feel like he doesn't care about the wedding. He is supposed to care about this stuff. I have been asking him forever can we sit down and do the guest list. He was supposed to do it with me last night and he didn't feel like it. Then he said we would do it today after the florist. Now he's saying he's too tired today and that once our wedding is less than a year away he will do everything. Our wedding is a year and one week away! I don't understand I am scared and afraid he doesn't want to marry me!
stop that!!! !im sure he wants to marry you.
i do have to say that going to a florist is NOT something most men wanna do. Jackie went by herself (with her mom actually) because i wanted no part of that. lol
dont be so hard on him, and stop thinking he doesnt wanna marry you
rocketsummer17
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Re: So pissed at FH
some guys just arent into the wedding stuff...dont force it on him, he will only resist more...
Ray8183
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Re: So pissed at FH
He will help in his own time. Most men don't understand.
christine2010
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Re: So pissed at FH
it has nothing to do with marrying you or the wedding. its the way guys are. they always think that everything can be done last minute.
for the guest list: just do it yourself & then him to look it over. that will get him moving.
for the florist appointment: either go today by yourself or find a friend to go with you. once he sees your moving along with everything he will realize oh crap she is doing stuff without me.
Yeah but I told him in the beginning that I'd be more than happy to go by myself to these things and he said no that he wanted to be involved in the decision making. That's why I am so upset now. He says things and then doesnt do it. Like for example we met a pastor at the bridal showcase and I asked him what he thinks. and he said lets go home and check out her website and see what she has. So that was 2 weeks ago!! Everytime I ask him if he wants to go online and look at hes says not now. And just now in the car when we were coming home he made me mad and I was telling him its hurtings my feelings and he makes these noises like mocking me and its not funny!!
lori7570
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Re: So pissed at FH
I'm sorry girlie....It sounds like he really doesn't understand why it bothers you...back off for a little while, than after the one year mark...discuss it again. When you discuss it don't be accusatory, just talk about how you are feeling, not what he isn't doing...
soontobecruz
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Re: So pissed at FH
awww... don't feel bad some guys just arn't as into the weddings as we girls want them to be. Atleast I feel that way all the time FH rarley wants to do anything regarding the wedding excpet check the cost of things. I have to bride him with food to go to stuff. lol....
I agree that the florist might be one of the things most guys REALLY won't be into. I don't plan on going with my FI that will be one thing I know I will handle on my own.
I would tell him how you feel and maybe ask him to make that guest list up he promised while you are at the florist. Just a thought...
Feel better he wants to marry you! !
kimmaymb20
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Re: So pissed at FH
awww
guys stink sometimes. Do some planning on your own and see how fast he moves his butt.
Sandradv121
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Re: So pissed at FH
Awww he loves you! Maybe the wedding is not his thing! Just talk to him and say that these things need to be done and you really need his support.
Lsorrent
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Re: So pissed at FH
I have to agree with the others. I don't think that it's that he doesn't love you, I think he's just not gung-ho wedding type. My FH nearly died when I had him go to Fortunoff to register with me. I had to buy him dinner afterward because he was so miserable. He has already told me that he wants NOTHING to do with the florist.
Is there anything that he DOES want to do? Can you maybe give him one project for himself? My FH wanted to come for halls and music, and that was really it. He did come with me to the photographer, but only b/c the owner is a family friend and I wanted them to meet.
little j
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Re: So pissed at FH
maybe he is just burnt out a bit and probably a bit overwhelmed too. i know my FH wants to be involved and come to all the appointments, but i can tell you after looking at 15+ RHs, he is starting to feel burnt out!!!! so when i even bring up other vendors, he just cant process it yet.
give him time. i dont think FHs really understand the planning process. like here, on these boards, lots of the brides have a majority of their vendors booked over a year out from the big day. but do FHs really understand that or get that? probably not.
i dont think it has anything to do with him not wanting to marry you...im sure if it was up to him, he would marry you TOMORROW and forget all this planning nonsense!
dont be sad or take it as an offense. im sure he loves you oodles and oodles and he just needs a break.
if the 1-year mark is the motivating factor, then why not try this -- tell him that you will give him 1 week off so that you can BOTH take a break from teh wedding and the planning process. i am sure he would welcome that. then, when next week comes, he may be refreshed and back into it.
JMO....HTH...
JenBill61210
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Re: So pissed at FH
some guys are not into it. if you don't mind maybe you can check a few places on your own and drag FH to the top contenders?
stinenandy2010
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Re: So pissed at FH
There are plenty of guys out there who just aren't into wedding planning, I wouldn't get too upset over it....my FH doesn't enjoy the whole wedding planning, I always ask him if he wants to go or not, and if he doesn't want to go to an appointment I don't usually care anymore.
MrsC2010
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Re: So pissed at FH
i totally understand why you would be upset....i know fh doesn't care about stuff like the color scheme and things like that...but as far as major vendors, guest list, etc he has been really involved and i would def be upset if he wasn't....first bc i want him to care about the day and 2nd bc its not fair for all the stress of planning to fall on the bride.
just talk to him and let him know you need him to be a little more involved....i def don't think its that he doesn't wanna marry you...i just don't think he realizes that you need him to be part of the planning.
italgal
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Re: So pissed at FH
Don't make yourself crazy. My FH can't be bothered either. Look at the bright side. You can go & do what you want without having him along with his opinion. Let him stay home, take your MOH with you.
mzmahagony
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Re: So pissed at FH
Don't say that, I'm sure he wants to marry you. It's just that some guys are not really into that stuff and we need to understand that. I know that you would want him to be a part of everything because I would want my FH t be as well but the reality of it is that that's just not his thing. My FH only really cares about how much things are going to cost and the food. He could care less about the colors, flowers,decor or anything like that. I know that he loves me and he wants to marry me so I try not to let it bother me. I must admit that I get upset when he doesn't want to do wedding things with me but then I think about it and understand that he really doesn't have to. There are many things that are important to him that I could care less about like sports...lol. He invites me to go to games and stuff like that and I always say no, so try not to get upset. Just let him know how you feel and compromise with eachother.
