so mom has been 8 weeks off of cigarettes (yay good for her) it has been a really hard 8 weeks but i have been nothing but supportive! so yesterday, she didnt buy her new patches and went and smoked.....of course this disappoints me but not the real issue at hand....so my dad (who never gets mad at anything) was really upset with her and saying things to her...future grandchildren came up and her not being here for them, and she said....well, maybe i dont want to be here for them, i have done enough, you can take care of it all....
i was so shocked that she would say that....why be so hurtful??!
then this morning, act like NOTHING happened....
just needed to vent
mybabylovesmoi
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Re: so upset with my mom
ouch! That is not a great thing to hear obviously but if she doesn't say things like this often, I really would blame her kicking the nicotine addiction. It is rough coming off any kind of addiction and it might be making her a little extra grouchy?
oh, and menopause. That gets my mom into all sorts of crazy rants and then she's making me something yummy to eat.
VCanizalez
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Re: so upset with my mom
OMg I am so sorry she said that chica!..
I am sure she did not mean it liek that! Maybe she is just stress out and mad for what she did (smoke)...
Moonmist09
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Re: so upset with my mom
what she said was hurtful, but she was probably very cranky because she is still going through nicotine withdrawal and said hurtful things without thinking. i'm sure she will and wants to be with there for you and your dad and any future grandchildren that may come her way.
did she go back and buy her patches?
FutureMrsLots
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Re: so upset with my mom
I'm sure she didn't mean it. Coming from someone who socially smokes and wish I did more often (as dumb as that sounds), sometimes dumb thigns are said in the heat of the moment just because. I wouldn't take it personal.
Trying talking toher and tell her that you're upset and see if she's willing to try again.
depoc1011
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Re: so upset with my mom
thanks ladies.... i totally understand it could be from her withdrawls and what not as the hurtful, snarky comments have been coming and going for 8 weeks now but this one just was really bad...
thanks again for your support!
quirkybride
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Re: so upset with my mom
You could try to talk to her about it.
CappyGirl
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Re: so upset with my mom
Just crashing to offer support - I understand. My mom was the same way. I'd tell her cigarettes would kill her and she'd come back with some sassy remark about how she could get hit by a car and die too. They just find whatever ridiculous rationaization works for them so they don't have to deal with their addiction. It is SO HARD to quit cigarettes, but she fell off the wagon and she just has to get back on. I know she can do it - especially if she did it for 8 weeks already!! Remind her how great she felt for that 8 weeks. GL to your mom!
dCa51899
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Re: so upset with my mom
Posted by CappyGirl
Just crashing to offer support - I understand. My mom was the same way. I'd tell her cigarettes would kill her and she'd come back with some sassy remark about how she could get hit by a car and die too. They just find whatever ridiculous rationaization works for them so they don't have to deal with their addiction. It is SO HARD to quit cigarettes, but she fell off the wagon and she just has to get back on. I know she can do it - especially if she did it for 8 weeks already!! Remind her how great she felt for that 8 weeks. GL to your mom!
omg that's how my dad is too, so I just don't get on his case about quitting at all....its a lost cause
Christina - sorry about your mom's comment, I know that would really upset me too! Like the other girls said, I'm sure she was just grouchy and mad at herself for slipping up. Try bringing it up to her and I'm sure you'll feel a million times better!
ellie424
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Re: so upset with my mom
Like the other girls said, I'm sure that your mom didn't mean to say that comment to you Christina! She was probably extremely disappointed that she let in to her cravings and your dad getting upset with her probably made her even more stressed out about it.
Maybe try talking to your mom and letting her know that her comment really hurt you. I'm sure she will let you know that she really didn't mean it at all.
depoc1011
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Re: so upset with my mom
thanks ladies!
i tried calling her before from work but she rushed me off the phone...perhaps tongiht! again, thanks for the support! xo
Dc1204
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Re: so upset with my mom
I am so sorry she said that. And I am SO sure she didn't mean it...I finally stopped smoking after 8 years...i haven't smoke in 4 years come this november. It is really hard even though I hate the smell and hate the thought I still want one but I NEVER DO....its is a lot to get used to and I know your mom didn't mean that.....feel better
FutureMrsDe
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Re: so upset with my mom
i would be totally upset too. I am sure she was just trying to yell back. She didnt mean it.
JLWSJC
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Re: so upset with my mom
:( I'm sure she didn't really mean it. Maybe it was just the stress of trying to quit, of knowing she had a setback, and the pressure to do it for everyone else.
but that is very hurtful and i'm sorry she said it.
allornil
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Re: so upset with my mom
trust me, its the withdrawal talking.
You get so cranky. Its an addiction and when you quit..and I have and started again...you're like a caged animal sometimes.
madamsireeda213
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Re: so upset with my mom
Posted by allornil
trust me, its the withdrawal talking.
You get so cranky. Its an addiction and when you quit..and I have and started again...you're like a caged animal sometimes.
IYeah its def withdrawl talking. My mom has been on and off cigarettes for years. And in between the times she is off, she goes crazy on me. Tells me how she is so disappointed in me, all this crazy stuff. And by the next day...she apologizes and goes back to normal. Its def the withdrawal and the menopause :( i'm sorry hun. She probably didnt mean it and feels embarassed that she said it.
cc2011
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Re: so upset with my mom
I agree with the rest of the ladies. She definitely didn't mean it. She's definitely going through withdrawal. When my father quit- he was horrible!! He would make hurtful comments ALL THE TIME!!! Trust me, it'll get better.
Im getting Married
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Re: so upset with my mom
I agree with the others about stopping smoking
MrsCM
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Re: so upset with my mom
*hugs*
angelabarra12
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Re: so upset with my mom
aww christina im so sorry... im sure your mom truly doesnt mean that and is just going through alot with the smoking thing! you know how much you mean to her and how much your future children will mean to her as well....sometimes moms can say such harsh things...as we know girls can be! but you know she loves you
