FH is getting ready to take the exam for NYPD Academy. Well, he found out he needs 15 more college credits before January. So he goes up to the college today and gets all this crap together and financial aid whole nine yards. Even starts registering for classes.
I am so proud of him that he wants to do this, but now we may have to cancel our HM!!!! Until WHEN???? After he finishes college, then it's off to police academy until god only knows when. I am so upset right now I am trying not to cry and look unsupportive but I really wasn't expecting this, he just decided this the other day. I know that this is more important in the long run but I am still so upset I have been looking forward to this much needed vacation for months now. I don't want to spend my 1st week of married life at home with FILS.
Diane
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Re: soooo depressed (long)
Im so sorry Could you go away for the weekend?? Will he be going into the academy right when you are going on your hm??
kaangel217
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Re: soooo depressed (long)
That really stinks. He does'nt want to hold off until after the wedding?Could you do some weekend getaways after the wedding? I know its not the same
Iloveweddings
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Re: soooo depressed (long)
I know this may sound crazy, but could you take the HM before the wedding? Or, the way that the city's budget has been going, is he really sure that there will be a new NYPD class starting in January? Don't get all worked up now, wait a week or two, do some investigations and see what you can work out! MY FH and I will not be able to take the HM until after the wedding b/c I am a teacher and can't take the time off! It will all work out! Don't worry!
eternityawaits
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Re: soooo depressed (long)
The new class is definitely in January. He won't find out if he's in until December, but he needs to have college done by then.
The wedding is August 31st - college classes already started by then, and it's the Sunday of Labor Day weekend. I won't be able to take off any weekends around then either, just getting that week was a stretch. I would take the HM early, but now since it is so soon, I can't get off from work any other time (inventory time and busy season - I was lucky to get that week!!) and we don't have the $$$$$ yet either.
prncssrachel
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Re: soooo depressed (long)
I am so sorry to hear this, but you have to look at it this way, your FH is doing whatever it takes to make sure that he has a good future and that he can provide for the family that the two of you are going to start. Would it be better if he said, oh well, I need more college credits, better luck next time? No, it wouldn't be, and I know you know this. It really does $uck, I know, but everything honestly happens for a reason, and I have every ounce of faith that the two of you can work something out. Not only that, but I am sure if he were to explain to his professors he would be able to get out of that weeks classes. Where is taking classes?
jenny2penny
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Re: soooo depressed (long)
This is definetly a good thing your what your FH wants and both your futures. But look at it this way,,just because he takes the exam, this nov, does not guarentee he will be accepted. If he is, he'll still need to go through background investigations, physical and psych exams. So maybe it won't be the Jan class.
Be stronge and it will work out!
eternityawaits
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Re: soooo depressed (long)
They let him know in Dec. if he passed the tests, then they start physical/psych exams.. He is getting overly excited about this and is going to be very depressed and disappointed if he does not get the financial aid or does not get considered for the academy when that comes up.
I wouldn't be so mad, except he just decided TODAY that he is going to do this, and doesn't warn me or discuss it with me at all... he is only thinking of himself right now does not care about the HM or anything else that is going on except for this.. I know he hates his job and is miserable with that but I am also going to be his WIFE and I think he should have at least talked to me about it tooo... That really hurt my feelings and trying to talk to him right now is impossible.
jenny2penny
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Re: soooo depressed (long)
I can sympathise 100% FH decided to go into Coast Guard really without me. It hurt, and I made it clear that if we are to be married, he needs to start thinking for 2 and consulting with me about life events that effect BOTH of us.
Hang in there!
prncssrachel
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Re: soooo depressed (long)
Wait, he did not even discuss this with you? This is a MAJOR decision, and I think he needs to realize that there are no more one ended major decisions. It sounds like he's not doing what's best for the BOTH of you afterall. I mean, in the end, his intentions are right, but I think you need to sit him down ASAP and explain how these are not solo decisions anymore. He might not get it. Some guys are like that. JT gets like that with some things, but major decisions that cost money, change wedding plans, and change life in general are always weighed with pros and cons and well thought out. Try talking to him and let him know how you feel.
allure
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Re: soooo depressed (long)
Tina i hope he gets it
eternityawaits
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Thank you all girls
FH just came in and we are going to try to work something out.. have to see exactly what date the fall classes start.. The only other problem is that he has been having problems at his job and they may not let him take off either We're working on it.
