I noticed some people mentioning wearing evening gowns to afternoon weddings. Here's a question: Would you wear an 'evening gown' to a night wedding if the invitation did not state 'black tie or white tie'? I know I wouldn't. I consider an 'evening gown' to be something really, really fancy- and if the woman is wearing an evening gown, then the man should be wearing a tuxedo. To me, an evening gown is for an ultra-formal affair. I am thinking about something long and maybe satin with beading or sequins of somesort. Like a bridesmaid or prom dress sort of thing.
I think any wedding is a formal affair, even in the afternoon. If the invitation was black or white tie, then thats ultra-formal, and needs ultra formal (eve. gown and tux) attire. In my whole life, I do not think I have EVER worn an evening gown, to any affair. My wedding dress will be my first ultra formal dress.
Sorry so long. As a daytime bride, I am a little offened by the people who say that it is not a formal affair. Just because I choose to have the wedding in the afternoon (no matter what the reason), I still think I deserve the only formal party I will probably ever have in my life. I would be upset if the men showed up in pants and a shirt, no jacket or tie, and women were wearing more casual dresses. Would I cry over it and let it ruin my day? No. But I would be a little upset.
eroxgirl
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Re: Spinoff to Afternoon Wedding Attire
Posted by Goldi1021 I just wanted to make sure that no men showed up in Timberland boots with their shirts hanging out of their pants. THIS DOES HAPPEN!!!!
This scenario happened EXACTLY AS POSTED at my DH's cousin's wedding. Evening affair, Leonards of Great Neck.
Mrs. dleeny
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Re: Spinoff to Afternoon Wedding Attire
No one will 'win' this argument because the bottom line is, no 2 people are alike. If we were all alike, the world would be an awfully boring place.
Some people prefer gowns, some don’t. Some people hate their legs and wear pantsuits to a wedding, some would never wear a pantsuit to a wedding.
It’s a personal preference.
Goldi1021
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Re: Spinoff to Afternoon Wedding Attire
Posted by dleeny
No one will 'win' this argument because the bottom line is, no 2 people are alike. If we were all alike, the world would be an awfully boring place.
Some people prefer gowns, some don’t. Some people hate their legs and wear pantsuits to a wedding, some would never wear a pantsuit to a wedding.
It’s a personal preference.
You are right with the above statement. I think we should remember one thing though. Many wedding invitations start with:
'....requests the honour of your presence...'
I think if it is an honor to be invited to a celebration of love, then the guest should honor the couple with enough respect to dress appropriately. JMO.
Mrs. dleeny
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Re: Spinoff to Afternoon Wedding Attire
Posted by Goldi1021
Posted by dleeny
No one will 'win' this argument because the bottom line is, no 2 people are alike. If we were all alike, the world would be an awfully boring place.
Some people prefer gowns, some don’t. Some people hate their legs and wear pantsuits to a wedding, some would never wear a pantsuit to a wedding.
It’s a personal preference.
You are right with the above statement. I think we should remember one thing though. Many wedding invitations start with:
'....requests the honour of your presence...'
I think if it is an honor to be invited to a celebration of love, then the guest should honor the couple with enough respect to dress appropriately. JMO.
I agree.
My sister got married in CA on a Sat. night in an Opera House (very fancy) and all her co-workers showed up in micro mini skirts or super casual flowered short dresses. That definitely annoyed me.
Blu-ize
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Re: Spinoff to Afternoon Wedding Attire
I would wear a gown to almost anything! I feel very glam!
Probably not to a daytime wedding, but I love being glam!
BHW
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Re: Spinoff to Afternoon Wedding Attire
Posted by Goldi1021
Posted by dleeny
No one will 'win' this argument because the bottom line is, no 2 people are alike. If we were all alike, the world would be an awfully boring place.
Some people prefer gowns, some don’t. Some people hate their legs and wear pantsuits to a wedding, some would never wear a pantsuit to a wedding.
It’s a personal preference.
You are right with the above statement. I think we should remember one thing though. Many wedding invitations start with:
'....requests the honour of your presence...'
I think if it is an honor to be invited to a celebration of love, then the guest should honor the couple with enough respect to dress appropriately. JMO.
What's appropriate for some people may not be appropriate for others. I think there's a wide range of opinion on what is acceptable to wear to a wedding. Most, if not all, people agree that jeans and work attire are not appropriate for a wedding. Some people would wear sundresses and sport coats while others prefer to dress more formally. People from out-of-state may dress more causally for a wedding b/c weddings may not be as formal where they are from. Unless you state black tie or black tie optional, you really have no control over what guests wear. It's unfortunate that some people wear outfits to weddings that others would wear to a bbq, but hopefully you'll be having too much fun on your wedding day to really notice.
stephanielyse
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Mrs. dleeny
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Re: Spinoff to Afternoon Wedding Attire
Posted by stephanielyse
People all have their own ideas about what to wear to weddings and the more I read these posts the more I want to specify the formality on my invitations, just to prevent something bad from happening. A few months ago two friends of ours got married. They had a small daytime reception, but the bride was still wearing a ball gown and the groom wore a tux. I wore a pretty cocktail dress, as did my friend. FH wore a suit and tie. My friend's Fi wore jeans with an untucked button down shirt and a tie. I was appaled that anyone would wear that to a wedding. I understand that it wasn't an especially formal location, but it was still their special day and I think it's important for guests to dress appropriately!
I can't believe that ANYONE would think that jeans are ever appropriate at a wedding. especially around here!
lrs2005
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Re: Spinoff to Afternoon Wedding Attire
In September, DH and I attended a Thursday night wedding at the Crest Hollow and I wore a sun dress as did almost every other female guest. Well the bride and her BP were dressed to the nines, and she was upset that her guests worse sundresses. I think if someone has a preference, then please express the level of formality on the invite.
I usually use this as my rule of thumb
Monday-Thursday night wedding = sundress or coctail dress depending on the season
Friday night, Saturday day, Sunday day, Sunday night = cocktail or tea length dress
Saturday night or Sunday twilight (4pm-10pm) (or Sunday night on a holiday weekend) = gown or floor length formal dress
If a bride wants something else I like it when they specify it on the invite.
lorimari
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Re: Spinoff to Afternoon Wedding Attire
A wedding is a WEDDING!!!! Its a fancy affair whether its day or night, Friday or Saturday or even Thursday.
Unfortunately some people just don't know how to dress. Some of the outfits that people wore to my wedding still amaze me.
Pmpkn087
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Re: Spinoff to Afternoon Wedding Attire
I have two simple black dresses. One cocktail length and one long. I wear them to every wedding, with different shoes and accessories. BUT, I don't go to that many weddings
suebart112
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Re: Spinoff to Afternoon Wedding Attire
Posted by Goldi1021
IMO the location of a wedding shouldnt decide what dictates formality, rather the couple or the invitation. If I were invited to a black tie wedding in the backyard of a family's home under a tent (which happens more than you think in LI) and the invite said 'black tie', I'd wear a gown. If that same invitation said 'casual attire', I would me more inclined to wear something else. I wouldnt judge the hosts nor would I begrudge their preference. It is not my place.
Many people asked me if they have to wear a tux or a gown when they found out my wedding was black tie. I said no. I just wanted to make sure that no men showed up in Timberland boots with their shirts hanging out of their pants. THIS DOES HAPPEN!!!! Perhaps the only people who may not be in a suit would be a child as they grow so fast, it is not worth the investment for a family to buy a suit. THAT isnt practical, but for a male adult it is.
I'm getting married this Saturday afternoon at Flowerfield (a very expensive classy place). What matters to me is that the people who love us will celebrate this day with us. I dont care what people wear!! 50 years from now, thats not what I will remember! Dont sweat the small stuff!
Goldi1021
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Re: Spinoff to Afternoon Wedding Attire
Sorry. I care. Im entitled.
suebart112
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Re: Spinoff to Afternoon Wedding Attire
I didnt say you werent entitled. I'm just trying to give you some perspective.
What matters most are the people, not their outfits.
I'd give my right arm to have my nana at my wedding, but she passed away. I wouldnt care if she showed up in her bra and pantyhose!
Goldi1021
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Re: Spinoff to Afternoon Wedding Attire
I appreciate that and I am sorry for your loss. I just told my mother that I would give up every dime in deposits for a weenie roast wedding in the backyard if I could bring my father back - we lost him in July. But ya know what? He owned a tux and he would have worn it!
suebart112
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Re: Spinoff to Afternoon Wedding Attire
I'm sorry about your dad.
PrincessRose
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Re: Spinoff to Afternoon Wedding Attire
Posted by bethsiar
Honestly, people just don't get dressed up anymore. I was shocked about what some people were wearing at my SILs wedding recently. Shortsleeve dress shirts with no tie or anything (would a tie even make that better? I dont even know if it would! lol) but people (including brides) just have to learn to accept that.
I always try to wear floor length gowns to evening weddings, its the only time I get to! (except for New Years) and I think most LIW girls agree - here are a whole bunch of LIW girls at ChristineandRobs wedding
She had an evening Saturday night wedding so we all wore floorlength dresses (and I stood out b/c I wasnt wearing black! lol) ETA: none of us discussed it or anything beforehand
Oi, I look so bad in that picture! You're all so tall and gorgeous, and I'm short with bad hair.
(Beth, I'm not really pained to see that picture, just very surprised! )
