Spinoff to Christine's Spinoff- does who's paying for your wedding

JessicaM. Posted: Aug 16, 2005 01:47 PM

Spinoff to Christine's Spinoff- does who's paying for your wedding

factor in to how much you are spending on your BP?

I an say that if I was not paying for everything, I would definitely be more generous with their gifts. Luckily our BP knows the financial burden paying for this wedding is for us, so whatever we give them will be fine.

glinda_goodwitch Posted: Aug 16, 2005 01:50 PM

Re: Spinoff to Christine's Spinoff- does who's paying for your wedding

Definitely. I can afford to buy my girls a gift and pay for their hair because my parents and future inlaws are paying for almost everything else between them, except for things like OOT bags, and any crafts that I decide to do. If we were paying for it ourselves, I would absolutley have to spend less on BP gifts.

Beth1210 Posted: Aug 16, 2005 01:50 PM

Re: Spinoff to Christine's Spinoff- does who's paying for your wedding

for me yes- since I am not paying for much- I am spending more

if I was on a budget- I would expect them to understand

mfrsfeb Posted: Aug 16, 2005 01:51 PM

Re: Spinoff to Christine's Spinoff- does who's paying for your wedding

We are paying for it ourselves. How i am not sure but we'll see.//

cindyandkevin Posted: Aug 16, 2005 01:52 PM

Re: Spinoff to Christine's Spinoff- does who's paying for your wedding

Absolutely! If we were getting a lot more help financially then I'd certainly go ahead and spend more on our attendants. But they know we're doing this on our own, so I don't think they're expecting anything grand.

Soon2BeMrs2006 Posted: Aug 16, 2005 01:53 PM

Re: Spinoff to Christine's Spinoff- does who's paying for your wedding

FH's parents are paying for half of the reception(he has a lot more guests than i do).

I'm paying for my guests. My parents and FH are splitting all vendor costs. and my parents are paying for my dress.

My dad wanted to pay for my guests too, but I know he cant afford to do that without taking out a loan and didnt want to put that on him, and even though hes still insisting on it, FH and I wont let him.

but yes if i wasnt paying for my part of the reception i would definitely be more generous with BM gifts

CaMacho Posted: Aug 16, 2005 01:54 PM

Re: Spinoff to Christine's Spinoff- does who's paying for your wedding

Posted by Beth1210

for me yes- since I am not paying for much- I am spending more

if I was on a budget- I would expect them to understand

Same here... we are lucky that our parents are giving us our wedding so we can spend a little more on BP gifts, favors and the honeymoon. That is def a factor!

hmpena Posted: Aug 16, 2005 01:55 PM

Re: Spinoff to Christine's Spinoff- does who's paying for your wedding

If we weren't paying for the wedding ourselves, then I would definitely be more generous with my gifts.

ChrissynRicky Posted: Aug 16, 2005 01:59 PM

Re: Spinoff to Christine's Spinoff- does who's paying for your wedding

My parent's and FI's parents are splitting the Reception Hall (Fox Hollow)

FI & I are paying for everything else.

italia6973 Posted: Aug 16, 2005 02:05 PM

Re: Spinoff to Christine's Spinoff- does who's paying for your wedding

My dad is paying for the reception and we are paying evrything else. On top of everything else, I lost my job 4 months ago, so I probably won't be spending as much as I would have liked on my BP.

JessicaM. Posted: Aug 16, 2005 02:12 PM

Re: Spinoff to Christine's Spinoff- does who's paying for your wedding

Posted by ChristineAE

My parent's and FI's parents are splitting the Reception Hall (Fox Hollow)

fh & I are paying for everything else.

CAE I didn't think I could admire your quest for the deal even more...but now I do. Most people when they are not paying for things may TRY to find a GOOD deal, but they won't do it with the gusto that you do. you are just as careful with your parents money as you are with yours- that says a lot. kudos.

ChrissynRicky Posted: Aug 16, 2005 02:19 PM

Re: Spinoff to Christine's Spinoff- does who's paying for your wedding

Posted by JessicaM.

Posted by ChristineAE

My parent's and FI's parents are splitting the Reception Hall (Fox Hollow)

fh & I are paying for everything else.

CAE I didn't think I could admire your quest for the deal even more...but now I do. Most people when they are not paying for things may TRY to find a GOOD deal, but they won't do it with the gusto that you do. you are just as careful with your parents money as you are with yours- that says a lot. kudos.

AWWW...Thanks so much.

I'm First Generation, so the whole money value was instilled in me growing up. I appreciate everything my parents have ever given me and my brother's. I just couldn't fathom having them pay a lot for anything, most especially b/c I'd rather them spend on my brothers (one of which is still a 'baby' - 10) and they have plenty of paying for them to do.

marymoon Posted: Aug 16, 2005 02:24 PM

Re: Spinoff to Christine's Spinoff- does who's paying for your wedding

I think the total budget and the total amount you have to spend will alwyas be a factor. if BP gifts were the only thing I had to pay for, I'd be able to specd a lot on them. As it is, if we stick to a small BP, I hope we won't have to skimp too much. I was thinking the iPod shuffle is a great gift!

hsacks23r Posted: Aug 16, 2005 02:29 PM

Re: Spinoff to Christine's Spinoff- does who's paying for your wedding

Posted by cindyandkevin

Absolutely! If we were getting a lot more help financially then I'd certainly go ahead and spend more on our attendants. But they know we're doing this on our own, so I don't think they're expecting anything grand.

I am right along side w/you

CalJoe0124 Posted: Aug 16, 2005 02:33 PM

Re: Spinoff to Christine's Spinoff- does who's paying for your wedding

yes for us also, pretty much everything is paid for by parents so we can spend $ on those other things.

DUCKS2001 Posted: Aug 16, 2005 06:01 PM

Re: Spinoff to Christine's Spinoff- does who's paying for your wedding

remember the gifts are a TOKEN we dont have to spend alot like they are getting a bday gift a token of apprectation.

MissingTheBGene Posted: Aug 16, 2005 06:18 PM

Re: Spinoff to Christine's Spinoff- does who's paying for your wedding

I know everyone's going to look at me crazy, because both my parents and FI's parents are helping us out, but no, whether we were paying for our wedding on our own or receiving help as we are, I would still be generous with our attendant gifts and scrimp elsewhere if need be. If they are purchasing attire, paying for shower/bachelorette or bachelor parties etc., I feel that it's only right (again, this is IMO) that I should purchase them a gift that shows our appreciation of what we asked them to be a part of.

Of course I'm not saying you need to reimburse them for their costs or anything like that, but I take the bridal party gifts very to heart, and I'm putting a lot of thought and preparation into them, probably moreso than even my invites!

Again, this is just my stance on it, I know it's not always possible for others.

Goldi1021 Posted: Aug 16, 2005 06:59 PM

Re: Spinoff to Christine's Spinoff- does who's paying for your wedding

I'd like to be as generous as possible and as practical as possible. I personally do not see the point in buying a gift that will be used on the day of the wedding like jewelry or hair. IMO, it becomes more of a gift for the bride to show uniformity in her pictures and not a gift of appreciation/friendship.

I'd like to meet the BM or MOH who accepts the honor just for the gift. I have yet to receive a BM gift I liked or used after the wedding. Did I care? Not really. I was a BM for people who I loved***. If I didn't want the responsibilty (financial or time wise) I would never have accepted the offer to be in a BP.

*** (LIE- I never loved my brother's ex wife - I was only 16 so I had to do it because my mom said so.)

BKtoLI Posted: Aug 16, 2005 08:20 PM

Re: Spinoff to Christine's Spinoff- does who's paying for your wedding

I would like to be as generous as I can because I know they're spending a lot.

I was contemplating paying for the hair to be done because I know that they're all getting their hair done anyway, and they're all coming from far away, so it might be easier if I just pay for it and they just come straight to the hotel.

But I guess Leslie has a point. However, if they decide to do their own hair and makeup, I'll have to find someone else to do mine (because it's a 3 person minimum for them to come out and take care of me.)

I would like to give them each something individual to suit their personality, instead of jewelry since I'm not a big fan of the Stepford Wives look anyway!!

MissingTheBGene Posted: Aug 16, 2005 08:51 PM

Re: Spinoff to Christine's Spinoff- does who's paying for your wedding

Posted by Goldi1021

I'd like to be as generous as possible and as practical as possible. I personally do not see the point in buying a gift that will be used on the day of the wedding like jewelry or hair. IMO, it becomes more of a gift for the bride to show uniformity in her pictures and not a gift of appreciation/friendship.

I'd like to meet the BM or MOH who accepts the honor just for the gift. I have yet to receive a BM gift I liked or used after the wedding. Did I care? Not really. I was a BM for people who I loved***. If I didn't want the responsibilty (financial or time wise) I would never have accepted the offer to be in a BP.

*** (LIE- I never loved my brother's ex wife - I was only 16 so I had to do it because my mom said so.)

Very well said, Leslie.