FH and I getting close to our wedding date, and we are starting to have some doubts. It's not that we don't want to marry each other, but we've had a very rocky engagement. We've had some very serious issues with his family. They have not expressed joy for us really, and don't care too much for me. The story behind that could take up four pages, but the short bit is that they think we've said and done some terrible things that we didn't say or do at all.
On top of that, FH and I have been so busy with work, school, and life in general that we haven't had time to sit back and enjoy each other as much as we would have liked. Our intimate relationship suffered.
So our engagement has not been what we wanted it to be. We wanted to be excited, we wanted to be early anticipating our wedding, but instead we felt guilty being happy about it, and supressed our emotions. It seems like every time we tried to do something for ourselves or our wedding, someone felt we were out to hurt them.
Most recently FH had his BP and the turn of events at that party were less than ideal. I guess this was the last straw, the last thing to go wrong for our wedding.
FH seriously wants to postpone the wedding, start all over again and do it 'right'. Have our enagement all over again, this time giving it all the attention it warrants. He wants to change a lot about the wedding itself too.
Any thoughts?
spel
Posted:
Member since
Re: starting all over again ? (sorry, long)
have you considered any type of counseling? i'm a big proponent of pre-marriage & marriage counseling to bring couples closer together & work out issues. it might seem extreme, but it has helped many people deal with issues similar to yours. best of luck, let us know how you are doing.
The Original 2nd-time-around
Posted:
Member since
Re: starting all over again ? (sorry, long)
My FI and I go to pre-marital counseling, mainly because we have both been married once before and want to make sure we work out some issues BEFORE we do it again.
I'd highly recommend it, and if you live in Suffolk, I would Highly recommend our counselor.
