St.Joseph's in babylon girls!!!! (anyone getting married in a church)

ok so im having a terible time with the church im supposed to get married in... thank goodness my FH, parents and FILs are all behind me in my feelings... if you want to know how the first too meetins went ill be more then happy to share just saving some time... so here are my ?s'

How is pre-cana/FOCUS???

Do you enjoy going???

Does it make you feel like your being JUDGED??

How often do you go??

THANK YOU!!!!!

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Posted by Soon2BMrsD

ok so im having a terible time with the church im supposed to get married in... thank goodness my FH, parents and FILs are all behind me in my feelings... if you want to know how the first too meetins went ill be more then happy to share just saving some time... so here are my ?s'

How is pre-cana/FOCUS???

Do you enjoy going???

Does it make you feel like your being JUDGED??

How often do you go??

THANK YOU!!!!!

---

I've been to 2 sessions and
Im really enjoying it! especially with the other couples (hint hint jess )

no i don't feel like im being judged at all! actually they make it comfortable for you..they don't want you to feel akward

Its every other week (at least thats how it has been) we have a total of 6 sessions!
hth meg..and don't worry it will be fine!! trust me! im a worry wart and was scared shi t less before we started! lol its not a big deal at all!!!!!

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Posted by Bride 2 Be

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Posted by Soon2BMrsD

ok so im having a terible time with the church im supposed to get married in... thank goodness my FH, parents and FILs are all behind me in my feelings... if you want to know how the first too meetins went ill be more then happy to share just saving some time... so here are my ?s'

How is pre-cana/FOCUS???

Do you enjoy going???

Does it make you feel like your being JUDGED??

How often do you go??

THANK YOU!!!!!

---

I've been to 2 sessions and
Im really enjoying it! especially with the other couples (hint hint jess )

no i don't feel like im being judged at all! actually they make it comfortable for you..they don't want you to feel akward

Its every other week (at least thats how it has been) we have a total of 6 sessions!
hth meg..and don't worry it will be fine!! trust me! im a worry wart and was scared shi t less before we started! lol its not a big deal at all!!!!!

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thanks so much kristen... i just have been hearing nothing but great feed back from girls doing pre-cana/FOCUS and im having a miserable time with my so called pre-marital counsling... its horible the pastor is doing nothing but juding me he's got that male macho thing going on tells me my answers arent good enough, next session we HAVE to speak about SEX which is fine and all but im a VERY private person and i dont feel comfy doing that and then he tells me that my marriage wont work if school is this imporatnt to me and to STOP hiding my ture feelsing about how upset that it makes me (PS IT DOESNT!!!)

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Posted by Soon2BMrsD

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Posted by Bride 2 Be

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Posted by Soon2BMrsD

ok so im having a terible time with the church im supposed to get married in... thank goodness my FH, parents and FILs are all behind me in my feelings... if you want to know how the first too meetins went ill be more then happy to share just saving some time... so here are my ?s'

How is pre-cana/FOCUS???

Do you enjoy going???

Does it make you feel like your being JUDGED??

How often do you go??

THANK YOU!!!!!

---

I've been to 2 sessions and
Im really enjoying it! especially with the other couples (hint hint jess )

no i don't feel like im being judged at all! actually they make it comfortable for you..they don't want you to feel akward

Its every other week (at least thats how it has been) we have a total of 6 sessions!
hth meg..and don't worry it will be fine!! trust me! im a worry wart and was scared shi t less before we started! lol its not a big deal at all!!!!!

---

thanks so much kristen... i just have been hearing nothing but great feed back from girls doing pre-cana/FOCUS and im having a miserable time with my so called pre-marital counsling... its horible the pastor is doing nothing but juding me he's got that male macho thing going on tells me my answers arent good enough, next session we HAVE to speak about SEX which is fine and all but im a VERY private person and i dont feel comfy doing that and then he tells me that my marriage wont work if school is this imporatnt to me and to STOP hiding my ture feelsing about how upset that it makes me (PS IT DOESNT!!!)

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wow! thats horrible! I've never felt that way once in precana.. and we are doing it with an actual married couple..not a pastor..i think it would be much different.

I actually enjoyed pre-cana...I know it sounds strange, but our host couple was wonderful and it was not intrusive or personal AT ALL! i expected it to be and we were both pleasantly surprised. As far as FOCUS, we did not have to go, so I cannot answer that. However, I have heard it is a bit too intrusive. Again, just hearsay. We only had to attend pre-cana for one weekend at St John the Baptist Church in Babylon....any other questions, feel free to ask

wel i agree.. i would feel more comfy if there was more people there but its just one on one and he doesnt like anything i have to say and he said we HAVE to be at church EVERY week and sometimes i just cant get there ya know??? plus when you make me so uncomfortable i dont want to be involved.. and at first ir eally wasnt open to going and enjoying this process but now that im really into wanting to go and then i get this in return it makes me not want to go again (if that makes any sense)

thanks for listening.. i just wanted to know if theres a better solution out there... cuz i think ill be calling MY church tomorrow to see if they are still available for my day so that we can switch churches!

We haven't start ours yet but I am looking forward to it. I have only heard good things.

We do ours with a married couple too for 6 weeks.

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Posted by bella1028

I actually enjoyed pre-cana...I know it sounds strange, but our host couple was wonderful and it was not intrusive or personal AT ALL! i expected it to be and we were both pleasantly surprised. As far as FOCUS, we did not have to go, so I cannot answer that. However, I have heard it is a bit too intrusive. Again, just hearsay. We only had to attend pre-cana for one weekend at St John the Baptist Church in Babylon....any other questions, feel free to ask

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Thank you so much i was really expecting to enjoy it but like it you said its SO INTRUSIVE its making me not want to go and im DEF not enjoying it i come home crying everytime we go... theres obviously something wrong with this !

thanks alot girls.. see i was not very religious growning up we never went to church so i was aprehensive about going to begin with and i feel like this is everthing i was hoping it NOT to be... but i also feel like you go to church to be ACCEPTED NOT JUDGED? and all im having done is being judged.. and the pastor IGNORES NICK as if hes not there never askes him to answer and ?'s only me!

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Posted by Soon2BMrsD

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Posted by bella1028

I actually enjoyed pre-cana...I know it sounds strange, but our host couple was wonderful and it was not intrusive or personal AT ALL! i expected it to be and we were both pleasantly surprised. As far as FOCUS, we did not have to go, so I cannot answer that. However, I have heard it is a bit too intrusive. Again, just hearsay. We only had to attend pre-cana for one weekend at St John the Baptist Church in Babylon....any other questions, feel free to ask

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Thank you so much i was really expecting to enjoy it but like it you said its SO INTRUSIVE its making me not want to go and im DEF not enjoying it i come home crying everytime we go... theres obviously something wrong with this !

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No problem at all...I do agree that there is something wrong when you come home upset...that should never happen. Maybe you can check out other churches and explain your situation. Do you and FH share the same church? if not, maybe you can check his out...or vice versa...I am sorry this is happening...it just really should not be like that

I have to agree with Kristen, pre cana has been a really good experience and its fun having her and her fh in it with us. I think that is horrible how the deacon is making you feel.

My good friend got married at St. Joes last year and her pre cana was at a married couples house with a few other engaged couples and they loved it

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Posted by jteach711

I have to agree with Kristen, pre cana has been a really good experience and its fun having her and her fh in it with us. I think that is horrible how the deacon is making you feel.

My good friend got married at St. Joes last year and her pre cana was at a married couples house with a few other engaged couples and they loved it

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THANK YOU!!! so much! im def calling st.joes tomorrow.. i havent gone there yet were at FHs church now and i need out! haha

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Posted by Soon2BMrsD

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Posted by jteach711

I have to agree with Kristen, pre cana has been a really good experience and its fun having her and her fh in it with us. I think that is horrible how the deacon is making you feel.

My good friend got married at St. Joes last year and her pre cana was at a married couples house with a few other engaged couples and they loved it

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THANK YOU!!! so much! im def calling st.joes tomorrow.. i havent gone there yet were at FHs church now and i need out! haha

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The only thing is that I think if you do not live in their little district that they won't marry you unless your family is a member there. We called there at first and they didn't even want to talk to me b/c we lived in West Babylon and no one in our family belonged.

If you are interested. The church Kristen and I go to in West Ilsip is soooooo down to earth and easy going and they will let like anyone get married there I think. Let me know if you would like the info on that church

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Posted by jteach711

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Posted by Soon2BMrsD

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Posted by jteach711

I have to agree with Kristen, pre cana has been a really good experience and its fun having her and her fh in it with us. I think that is horrible how the deacon is making you feel.

My good friend got married at St. Joes last year and her pre cana was at a married couples house with a few other engaged couples and they loved it

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THANK YOU!!! so much! im def calling st.joes tomorrow.. i havent gone there yet were at FHs church now and i need out! haha

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The only thing is that I think if you do not live in their little district that they won't marry you unless your family is a member there. We called there at first and they didn't even want to talk to me b/c we lived in West Babylon and no one in our family belonged.

If you are interested. The church Kristen and I go to in West Ilsip is soooooo down to earth and easy going and they will let like anyone get married there I think. Let me know if you would like the info on that church

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yes our church is great!! definately easy going and i was surprised being that its a catholic church!

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Posted by jteach711

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Posted by Soon2BMrsD

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Posted by jteach711

I have to agree with Kristen, pre cana has been a really good experience and its fun having her and her fh in it with us. I think that is horrible how the deacon is making you feel.

My good friend got married at St. Joes last year and her pre cana was at a married couples house with a few other engaged couples and they loved it

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THANK YOU!!! so much! im def calling st.joes tomorrow.. i havent gone there yet were at FHs church now and i need out! haha

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The only thing is that I think if you do not live in their little district that they won't marry you unless your family is a member there. We called there at first and they didn't even want to talk to me b/c we lived in West Babylon and no one in our family belonged.

If you are interested. The church Kristen and I go to in West Ilsip is soooooo down to earth and easy going and they will let like anyone get married there I think. Let me know if you would like the info on that church

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thank you but that is my church.. i made my confirmation there and my family belongs there as well the onyl one that doesnt is nick

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Posted by Soon2BMrsD

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Posted by jteach711

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Posted by Soon2BMrsD

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Posted by jteach711

I have to agree with Kristen, pre cana has been a really good experience and its fun having her and her fh in it with us. I think that is horrible how the deacon is making you feel.

My good friend got married at St. Joes last year and her pre cana was at a married couples house with a few other engaged couples and they loved it

---

THANK YOU!!! so much! im def calling st.joes tomorrow.. i havent gone there yet were at FHs church now and i need out! haha

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The only thing is that I think if you do not live in their little district that they won't marry you unless your family is a member there. We called there at first and they didn't even want to talk to me b/c we lived in West Babylon and no one in our family belonged.

If you are interested. The church Kristen and I go to in West Ilsip is soooooo down to earth and easy going and they will let like anyone get married there I think. Let me know if you would like the info on that church

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thank you but that is my church.. i made my confirmation there and my family belongs there as well the onyl one that doesnt is nick

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Oh, okay, then that shouldn't be a problem, I would definetly call ASAP
Good Luck, keep us posted