Danielle and I were discussing this the other night. She doesnt like my last name, and I really don't either. She wants me to take her last name when we get married instead of her taking my last name. The only reason I think this sounds like a good idea is because I don't want our kids to have to go through the torture of from the children in school like I did. There were plenty of names to make up to call me because of my last name. Thanks dad lol.
So has anyone ever heard of the groom taking the brides last name when they are married? Is it just tradition that the bride takes the grooms last name or is there a law that says that this has to be done? Thanks, Scott
Happybride2005
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Re: Taking the brides last name???
I don't think there's a law. But it would be different though.
CubanBride
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Re: Taking the brides last name???
There is no law saying the bride has to take the grooms last name, it is just tradition.
I think the groom taking the brides last name is a little odd, but that is just my own thing. If you both think its a good idea, then go for it.
fallinlove04
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Re: Taking the brides last name???
you can take any name that you want to. i was trying to convince my fi to take mine, but he won't have it. his name is fine though..i am just partial to mine.
i think it is great....
LIPrincess00
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Re: Taking the brides last name???
I dont think its the 'law', but I do think you both should do what's best for you.
Monkeybride
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Re: Taking the brides last name???
If it makes both of you happy that's all that matters. Be prepared to get some flack from some people if you do it but it's about you and your wife and what makes you happy.
cluelessbride
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Re: Taking the brides last name???
You ROCK! for even considering it. GO SCOTT!!!
I tried to get my FH to think about it but he immediately said no way. I said why is it ok for me to take your name, blah, blah, blah but he wasn't hearing it.
I have heard of it, but don't know anyone who has done it.
checka
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Re: Taking the brides last name???
I have heard of both wife & hubby having herlastname-hislastname as their last name. I also remember someone on here had combined part of each last name to create a new last name. I think that you should do what's best for you.
04Bride
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Re: Taking the brides last name???
kids can be really really mean and if it means saving your kid from that kind of abuse.. i say do it!! however how diesyoufamily feel about it Scott? Are your parents upset?
MamanDaddyof2
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Re: Taking the brides last name???
one of my old bosses took his wifes last name and hyphen his too ex. smith-jones then eventually just dropped his when they had a child
Kosta's Kitty
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Re: Taking the brides last name???
One of my FH's friends changed his last name to his wife's and I don't think anyone thought twice about it.
janwinterbridejoy
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Re: Taking the brides last name???
i dont think there is any law against it but i would have a conversation with my father before you did anything. i think he may be a little hurt that your not going to carry on the family name.
mosh913
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Re: Taking the brides last name???
My FH was considering taking my last name, but then his dad passed away, and he heard the story of his grandparents' struggle in Germany during WWII. He doesn't want to be disrespectful to his Grandmother. I think I am going to hyphenate. Oh but I do know a couple where the guy took his wifes last name. It's done, just not very common.
Danielle&Scott
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Re: Taking the brides last name???
Posted by 04Bride
kids can be really really mean and if it means saving your kid from that kind of abuse.. i say do it!! however how diesyoufamily feel about it Scott? Are your parents upset?
I havent spoken to them yet, and I wouldnt even know how to. I dont know if I should even consider it, that is the problem. After me there is no other boys in the family that would be able to take the family name to the next generation. That would probably be really hard for my dad to take, and I dont know if I would want to put him through that.
I know he has always wanted me to have children, and he would love if I could have a grandson, because then his families name would still be around after im gone....My sister has two boys but she doesnt have my last name any more and my brother only has a daughter, so it would be up to me.
Danielle doesnt even know that I was thinking about this, because when we discuss it I just change the subject. I am sure she will see this post though.....
I dont know what to do...I dont want to upset my parents, and I dont want my kids to have problems in school.....im confused.
What would you do?
HearzBellz
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Re: Taking the brides last name???
I think that is really cool. I do not think there is any law....I mean anyone can change their name at anytime for $250 at the courthouse....
I would speak with parent on both sides first. I know DH did not take the hypenated name with me b/c MIL freaked about the family name not being carried on ......
(which is why I hypened my name to begin with)
I think it is very progressive & cool.
janwinterbridejoy
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Re: Taking the brides last name???
scott,
what do you care about bratty little kids are going to stay to your kids? my maiden name was hugely long and very polish and i would get made fun of all the time but i knew it was part of my heritage and knew it had a background behind it and was brought up to be proud of it.
if you teach your kids although it may be funny to some how important your name is to there heritage and there grandfather then they will grown up not resenting you but being proud that there carrying on the last name of not only there father but there grandfather before them.
i think if there is a slight chance that it will hurt your father and im sure your mom as well then i wouldnt do it.
Brandalina
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Re: Taking the brides last name???
There's no law, and I don't think it's weird at all. I've heard of people actually changing BOTH of their last names, either to a combination of the two, or to a new last name entirely.
Janine24
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Re: Taking the brides last name???
wow... I don't know what I would do...
I would feel funny having FH take my last name but I guess it's just b/c of tradition...
is your last name THAT terrible?
EvenEdan
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Re: Taking the brides last name???
I tried to convince my FI to do this at one point.. He said noway! We both agree that my last name is way nicer than his, but his family would be so hurt and he said he would feel ridiculous if he took my last name. As if that makes me the man in the relationship or something. Then I tried to convice him that we should just pick a brand new last name and both change our names, that didn't work either. But how cool would it be to get to pick your own name!!
DrmnBlnd
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Re: Taking the brides last name???
The law in NYS is that you CAN take the brides last name. There is a spot on the marriage license that asks whether the groom wants to do this or not. I've had a few grooms do this. (I work in a Towb Clerk's Office). It's been for various reasons- but most have been because the guys just don't like their names!
