The Dreaded P word!

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Posted by drivwal

I wouldn't sign it but that is just me. Talk it over with him and see if he really wants you to sign it or if it is just a suggestion made by his partners. I wouldn't be hurt that it came up either, just make sure that your personal views are known.

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not a suggestion...its mandatory for all the partners...

apparently one of the partners was screwed in a previous situation and the wife almost took down his business

and i wouldnt technically being signing a prenup- its more like id be signing a form stating I can't touch the business if a divorce were to happen

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Posted by ooxrosaliexoo

what i dont like about a prenup is that its talking about divorce before you're even married. the P-word reminds me of the D-word and they both TOTALLY ****. Thank god FH and I are both broke lol

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and yessssssssssss!

I cannot stand discussing this...its like why the hell are we discussing divorce when we are just getting married???!!!!

UGH!


ETA:
sorry for so many posts. i was away from the computer and wanted to address so many of yoru comments!

i knew this thread would get heated...but wanted some thoughts!

Well if its just the business itself then I dont think it a big deal. but as far as prenups I dont like them either. Just the idea of a one document controlling some aspects of my future doesnt sit well with me.

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Posted by LoveyDovey

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Posted by drivwal

I wouldn't sign it but that is just me. Talk it over with him and see if he really wants you to sign it or if it is just a suggestion made by his partners. I wouldn't be hurt that it came up either, just make sure that your personal views are known.

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not a suggestion...its mandatory for all the partners...

apparently one of the partners was screwed in a previous situation and the wife almost took down his business

and i wouldnt technically being signing a prenup- its more like id be signing a form stating I can't touch the business if a divorce were to happen

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Posted by krystalle

WOW, I think I am the only person who thinks it is ok to sign a P. I have a house, etc. and I want my FH to sign one. I am sorry, in todays world, you could never be too certain and it is always best to protect yourself first and your loved ones second. Our agreement is he will go on the deed of my house when we have kids. We have been together for 10 years but you just never know.

Call me selfish or maybe I have seen too many women/men get the loose end.

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No, i think it's good to hear everyone's opinions. FH and I bought our house together so both our names are on the deed. If I had my own house or a large inheritance, I may feel different.

If you sign something like that, that also forecloses you from getting ANY money from the business in the event that God forbid your FH dies at ANY point during the duration of the business unless the partnership agreement they sign expressly has contingencies for spouses in the event of death.

Just be very careful - you might want to see a lawyer about it. I'm just a law student

How does your FH feel about this?

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Posted by leesah85

If you sign something like that, that also forecloses you from getting ANY money from the business in the event that God forbid your FH dies at ANY point during the duration of the business unless the partnership agreement they sign expressly has contingencies for spouses in the event of death.

Just be very careful - you might want to see a lawyer about it. I'm just a law student

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leesah brings up a VERY good point.

If that were the case and you decide to sign it I would make sure there's a clause in there that - god forbid- if anything were to happen to your FH you get his share.

And honestly, I think in your case I would really go to a lawyer and ask them what the implications are. With your FH of course.

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Posted by Gerbera

How does your FH feel about this?

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Posted by leesah85

If you sign something like that, that also forecloses you from getting ANY money from the business in the event that God forbid your FH dies at ANY point during the duration of the business unless the partnership agreement they sign expressly has contingencies for spouses in the event of death.

Just be very careful - you might want to see a lawyer about it. I'm just a law student

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leesah brings up a VERY good point.

If that were the case and you decide to sign it I would make sure there's a clause in there that - god forbid- if anything were to happen to your FH you get his share.

And honestly, I think in your case I would really go to a lawyer and ask them what the implications are. With your FH of course.

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yes you girls do have a very good point!

my understanding is that the document will be directly related to divorce and the business profits

i will def talk to a lawyer...but i reallllly do not want the the meeting with the lawyer to turn into a prenup session which i have a feeling will happen

FH doesnt think its that big of a deal and I do slightly understand that this partner is fearful of losing his hard earned business to a money hungry divorcee- BUTTTT

I do feel that because it is my husband and i will be the one supporting him through this, that the business is partly mine too...even if I didnt personally write a check for X amount of dollars...once youre married you are ONE ENTITY in my opinion

it never came up with us cause we have no money and dont think we would argue in court over who gets the shot glass collection

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Posted by gina409

dont think we would argue in court over who gets the shot glass collection

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Posted by krystalle

WOW, I think I am the only person who thinks it is ok to sign a P. I have a house, etc. and I want my FH to sign one. I am sorry, in todays world, you could never be too certain and it is always best to protect yourself first and your loved ones second. Our agreement is he will go on the deed of my house when we have kids. We have been together for 10 years but you just never know.

Call me selfish or maybe I have seen too many women/men get the loose end.

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ITA. Also, I think marriage isn't *just* a romantic commitment. It IS a business deal because otherwise why would the IRS treat married people filing jointly differently than single people just living together ?
Theres a reason why some folks call marriage an 'institution'.

i don't think it's bad to talk about. i don't feel guilty talking about it, or like it's a jynx. i definately do not see myself ever getting divorced (if i did then i wouldn't be getting married lol) However, (unfortunately) reality is that unpredictable circumstances do occur. people change and divorce is extremely common and occurs more often than we'd like. you don't want to one day look back and say 'shoulda coulda woula'. you need to protect yourself and loved ones (including FH). My advice is to seek out legal advice and explore your options. marriage, along with being a romantic and spiritual connection is also a legal one.
OK I'll get off of my soap box now. haha

You should go to a lawyer with a copy of the proposed agreement. You have to go without your FH, because if you go together, you would both be the lawyer's clients. A lawyer can't give advice to one client that would be detrimental to the other, so might not be able to give you proper advice if you go with your FH.

You need to understand exactly what you are giving up before you really know whether its right for you. You also should remember that it could help you too, because it would protect you and your husband in the event one of the other business partners get divorced.