the problems of home ownership

we just bought our first house in february & we're both finding it totally overwhelming. our house is far from a 'fixer upper' but there is just so much to do. just the weekly maintenance (cleaning the entire house including 3 bathrooms, taking care of the lawn & backyard) is exhausting. we do not have the money to hire professionals (although we want to so badly!) after paying for the mortgage, utilities & WEDDING!

i just can't seem to keep up with the housework. we have a lot of property that needs to be taken care of. we're outside after work at least 3 days a week & one day on the weekend. tonight i spent 2 hours laying down mulch around the perimeter of the house. i am the queen of making lists, but it just keeps gettting longer & we're not crossing much off!

i hate to sound like a brat. we love this house & we do enjoy working to take care of it. i know so many people are struggling just to save the money to buy a home. we are very lucky. but its tough!! on nights like this, i wish we had seriously considered a condo...

anyone else struggling with this??

I'm not a homeowner yet but I can imagine what's involved in owning a house!

I wonder about the same thing - I find it hard enough sometimes when I take care of my apt after a full week of work!

Are you and DH splitting the work? Maybe you can just set the priorites of what's most important and focus on that first....that way, it's less overwhelming?

Hang in there - it'll be worth it in the end!

spel - I TOTALLY hear you! Add a toddler to that description, and it's enough to make you want to cry!

the OTHER thing that $uck$ about homeownership is the neighbors! We have this one guy next door that seems to think it's his job to get on my husband's back about our landscaping! We just moved in at the end of April, and we set our priorities on make the interior livable first. WE KNOW we have a lot of work to do outdoors and my poor DH is breaking his a$$ every weekend to make progress. The last thing he needs is comments from some lazy a$$ neighbor who has a teenage son that mows the lawn and trims the hedges for him!

ABSOLUTELY. I hear ya!! We've been in our house almost 3 years now and I can sit here and type and honestly say that not one room has been finished...... We're working on it, but we both work full time, and we work incredibly long hours, and add to the fact my hubby works 6 days a week, I kid you not when I say it has taken us almost 3 years of Sunday's to get where we are today!

However, as much as we always say we live in a sh!t-hole, we wouldn't trade it for anything.

I have tons of pics of our 1/2 finished rooms. Maybe one day I'll get around to posting them. Just know I am in the same boat.... And to think we wanted to fix the house before we had kids... Uh, hello, I'd be an old fart by then!

Enjoy it

OMG - I often feel such the same way. Like you my house is not really at all a fixer upper and yet there is so much that needs to be corrected, fixed and maintained. We don't have huge outdoor property but yet I feel like we are always taking care of the garden and yard. Then when you finally get one thing accomplished something else breaks and another things gets added to the list.

One thing I find that helps is keeping the list small. Figure out priorities and make a list of those things - not everything that can possibly be done. It makes it a little less overwhleming and you feel a little bit better because the list disappears quicker. (Just when you start looking at the big picture - yikes back comes the overwhelming feeling).

Oh and the cleaning - I just can't keep up. DH and I finally decided we can have someone come in 2x a month to help out and maybe just clean baths, kitchen and hall. This is something I never thought I would consider but it may help to not have to worry about that stuff so we can get other things done. But I can't find anyone who comes weekends or evenings and I feel funny leaving my door open to a stranger like everyone else seems to do. I guess my city girl in me can't have that.

Then sometimes I feel ungrateful for being fortunate top afford such a house but homeownership...but it isn't that - it is just there isn't enough time in the day!

I have only lived in my house for 2 weeks and can I just say....it is so much work!!! There is so much we want to do, but have no time or money especially since we just moved and had all those costs - our savings are pretty depleted.
I have no idea how I'm going to clean everything (mind you it's not that big of a house, 3 BR and 2 baths).
I feel like I'm losing weight though from going up all those stairs, from the basement and then upstairs!
We're so happy to be in a house though.

Ugghh!!!! You took the words right out of my mouth!!! It is sooooooooo much fun and when you have time to reflect you realize it's actually 'your's' but it is sooooooooooo much work!!!!!!!!

I have a very small house and I still dont have the time to do all the thing I want in terms of cleaning and fixing it up, etc.. I think we all have to give ourselves a break - work and life sometimes have to take precedence to having a sparkling bathroom or kitchen.

As for home improvements, my list of to-dos far outreach my budget. I live in an old house and everything is 'non standard' so its really expensive. Add that to the fact that despite having loads of guys come over, we havent found a single person we feel comfortable doing the work for us. They all seem so incompetent or outrageously expensive!

It's a lot of work ... but it is so worth it. And think positively ... 'there is a light at the end of the tunnel'. There will always be things to fix, update, and clean ... but it does get easier. Right now ... it is overwhelming, b/c we want to do so much but after a lot of the initial work and decorating is done ... it just needs to be maintained. Also priortizing is a good idea ... I know that I want everything done yesterday ... but it's just not feasible, so Rob and I priortize, i.e. the basement will be done this year but landscaping, next.

Good luck to all the homeowners that are working their butts off!!!

When we bought (3 years ago), it was kind of a quick decision. I (we unofficially) were living in an apartment, and they were going to raise the rent again. So we decided to buy. Our mortgage for our condo is the same as we were paying in our 1 bedroom apartment!!
What we didn't figure, was all the work. We now wonder what we used to do with all our time. If I could do it over again, we may have waited another year to live foot loose and fancy free for a little longer :)
It is a lot of work. It's been 3 yrs and we're just finishing all the major projects, and it's only a 2 bedroom condo. But we love it. We love having our own place, more space and gaining equity.
And I agree with the previous post, sometimes you have to say 'screw it', and leave the house a mess or a project undone to live a little
My mom used to say ' There are more important things than a clean house', and I totally agree!

No matter how long you own your house there will always be something to do in it. As I type this today there is a huge hole in the back of my house where my bathroom wall used to be!! When the house was dormered 12 years ago the guy who did the work did a lousy job of sealing the upstairs bathroom. So for 12 years water has been running down the inside of the wall to the downstairs bathroom and we never knew it!!! When I had my upstairs bath redone they found the damage and now I have to have the downstairs bath done. So yesterday they ripped the whole bathroom out and today they rip the wall (all the wood was rotted away!). On top of that I have the tree guys here to cut down 2 dead trees in the backyard! I told my husband I would rather be at work than here!!!!! It just doesn't end!

i think a condo or townhouse is perfect for many couples, especially when there are no children involved. little outdoor work can really help a couple.

but i do love owning our home. it is A LOT of work and some times unexpected things come up which usually= $$$$$. i have my best friend's 15 year old daughter come in 1-2X a month to help me with the cleaning so that is a huge help. we also decided to have a lawn service cut the lawn this summer. it is only $25 per week and worth it. I really enjoy gardening so that doesn't bother me to do, although it can be back breaking work at times. plus we pace ourselves. i couldn't garden the entire yard this year so i concetrated on the front. the spring I will do the back yard. it is always a game of comprimise in a house.

Claud- tell your neighbor to mind his own darn business. is his house perfect or something? what a jerk.....

I agree that it is very difficult. I work very late hours and travel somewhat for work. When weekends come, I have to run all my errands and then devote the rest of Saturday to cleaning my house. It can get extremely difficult at times.

Spel, yes I totally understand. We have a big yard with lots of plants. You could spend all weekend every weekend with yard work alone.

Although I envy that you have 3 bathrooms, I'm glad I don't have to clean 3 each weekend.

Every Saturday morning: I clean the bathroom, then take a long soak in my nice clean shiny tub

oh thank god i'm not the only one. its just so frustrating. the work never ends! & every week there seems to be a new problem.

& did i mention that we have a deer problem?! they eat everything & poop everywhere! ahhhh!

but this is a great house. we are very lucky & we hope to be here a long time. it rained today so i didn't have to mulch but i'll be at it again tomorrow after work! i must say, it looks very nice!! i know its all worth it. especially when i am sipping wine out on my deck sitting on my nice patio furniture looking into the woods. its nice to relax & enjoy it when i can!