This is disturbing....

This is disturbing....

Yesterday, I went out to happy hour with a bunch of people that I work with. They are almost all married, or engaged, or seeing people, and they are all over each other! They havew no concept of the fact that they have significant others at home waiting forthem, and they are so cynical about their relationships. It is so sad. Last year, two of them were having this horrible affair- bot were married, and the guy had a one year old and his wife was 8 months pregnant! While he was out getting drunk, and fooling around, she was home hugely pregnant and running around after a baby! Whenever, I comment about their disgusting behavior, everyone is like, 'You'll see what it is like when you get married, you will be doing the same thing! ' I MOST CERTAINLY WILL NOT! Is it just me, or this really insane? They all act like it is normal.

Re: This is disturbing....

it is insane. i have this guy at work, that goes to the copa a few times a week without his wife. no one says u can't go out without your wife, but he loves to dance with all the single girls

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not thats insane....that will most likelu not happen to me or anyone i know. yes things happen, but as far it being 'normal' to cheat on our spouses....no, its not

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i feel bad for them....thats all i have to say. (meaning, i think is horrible!)

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thats absolutely horrible and yes.. very disturbing

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those are people that should not be married.

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i hate cheaters and homewreckers!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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That is beyond insane! If that's their definition of marriage, then they shouldn't be married.

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I started a new job four weeks ago and a bunch of people (married and in relationships mostly) are sleeping with other people in the office. It is so bad and out of control, no one is allowed to bring their spouses for the Christmas party this year for fear of a fight breaking out (this is the first year they are instituting this rule). The head bosses all know about these 'affairs' and I think some of them are even involved with people in the office. I feel like I work in the middle of a big ORGY. I love my job otherwise, but everyday there is constant drama. Its so disgusting and scary to see how many married people completely ignore thier vows and cheat. Its horrendous and terrifying to me and constantly makes me wonder if that could ever happen to my 'healthy relationship' with my FH. Do people really begin to hate each other after they get married??? Its very scary to even think about...

Re: This is disturbing....

Re: This is disturbing....

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Posted by Tracy&Brian

I started a new job four weeks ago and a bunch of people (married and in relationships mostly) are sleeping with other people in the office. It is so bad and out of control, no one is allowed to bring their spouses for the Christmas party this year for fear of a fight breaking out (this is the first year they are instituting this rule). The head bosses all know about these 'affairs' and I think some of them are even involved with people in the office. I feel like I work in the middle of a big ORGY. I love my job otherwise, but everyday there is constant drama. Its so disgusting and scary to see how many married people completely ignore thier vows and cheat. Its horrendous and terrifying to me and constantly makes me wonder if that could ever happen to my 'healthy relationship' with my FH. Do people really begin to hate each other after they get married??? Its very scary to even think about...

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No, most people do not hate each other after they get married.

I think most office affairs happen when the people work in close proximity and for extended periods without seeing their spouse. I know of many office hook ups between married or involved people. One woman (married) was caught having sex in a rarely used area of the building with her side guy.

As for the no spouses or dates at the office holiday party - been there done that and have seen many a hook up from that too

One office hook up that I know of has resulted in a child and the woman quickly married her boyfriend and not the side guy - who himself is married with twins. It's just a mess and the new husband has no idea that the child is most likely NOT his. I only know since guys do gossip and FH was told about all the details.

Last but not least, a friends ex (an NYPD lieutenant) had an office hook up and now he has a child with a woman from work (someone in narcotics). My friend dumped him since he can't even be trusted to go to work without sleeping around (and she caught him doing it before with a different woman from work)

ETA - I still thik these are isolated cases and that not everyone cheats.

Re: This is disturbing....

That is terrible! And yes, VERY disturbing!! I have never seen that going on and I'm surprised that the people doing it are so open about it!

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That IS horrible! And insane...if you are SO unhappy in your marriage then try to work it out, or get out of the marriage..and for GOD SAKE...STOP MAKING BABIES if you are that unhappy ni your marriage. I feel bad for the prego wife at home! There is a guy at my job who hits on the woman all the time but nobody entertains him. I couldnt even image!

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To me, it's disturbing, but I'm surprised by it. I work in Finance, and I can't tell you how many times I've seen the rings slip off into pockets at happy hour, parties, etc....

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that's so troubling to me... makes me wonder how it gets that bad, or what their relationships were like when they were good and got married... do things really deteriorate like that? :( sad thought....

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I find this behavior revolting!

I have seen people do this, a LOT! now that I am married (and even before) I wouldn't DREAM of doing something like that.

clearly these people are not in love. a person in love would never behave this way IMO

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I hate to hear this stuff!!! There is so much of this going on today, and it's just horrible to hear. I don't agree with it either way, but when there's kids involved, I hate it even more! So many people can't have kids and can't seem to find the right person, and then you have the people that take advantage of it all!

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That is.. i was in a situation like that at a work function..and it was such a turn off. i swear i couldn't look at that co-worker for a long time..it really made me loose all respect for them.

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IMHO, if you find the 'right' person, you will do whatever it takes to make it work, always. However, when in a relationship with the 'wrong' person, stepping outside the relationship doesn't seem all that bad (or wrong). There are a few friends I stopped speaking to because they stepped outside their marriage, and I thought it was completely wrong, dishonest and disgusting. Then I decided I had no idea what was going on in their relationship, and I was being too judgmental. (one girl in particular had a HUGE fear of being alone, and despite being in a psychologically abusive relationship couldn't leave until she found someone else to 'take care of her' - did that make cheating right? No, but after I heard all the facts and circumstances I understood what she did and why [although I thought counseling to build her self-esteem to leave was a much better option]) Do I think you're insane? No. Do I think cheating is wrong? Yes. Do I think cheating is normal? In certain circles, there are those that think it is.