I finally decided to invite all twenty something of my co-workers and their significant others. one by one they are asking me where I am registered and I don't know the right way to say don't bring boxes to my wedding. I told them I regitered for my shower and typically you don't register for a wedding and they looked really confused. I am not a rude or greedy person so I hope thats not how I am coming off but I really don't want to have to set up a gift table besides I've never even see this before not Italians weddings anyway. I really don't want to lugging boxes home after my wedding. How do I answer them what do I say ?
Kimbalina
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Re: This may sound rude but .........
Where are these people from? or where are you that they think they are wrapping presents?
snwb08
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Re: This may sound rude but .........
they won't bring them to your wedding. I invited about 10 co-workers and dates and only 2 gave me money. the others were all very generous and bought whatever was left off my registry (like china and flatware, and one bought ALL my champagne glasses) and just shipped them right to the address on your registry.
there really isn't a nice way to say 'i want money' and we might be used to it but it's a very NY thing; a lot of my OOT friends had a hard time giving me money; they thought it was impersonal.
ant n tilde
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Re: This may sound rude but .........
Just tell them where you are registered. Every hall has a gift table somewhere so they will know how to handle it - don't worry and put someone ELSE in charge of getting them at the end of the night. You shouldn't have to lug a single thing after your wedding besides your husband
I understand what you are saying but there is no nice way to say it to them.
Nicky0503
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Re: This may sound rude but .........
In know it's a tough topic but There is literally nothing left on my registry, I didn't register much to begin with cause I live on my own for about 15 years so what dod I possibly need. Also I don't want them to be embarrassed when they see they are the only one walking in with boxes.
zoe282
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Re: This may sound rude but .........
This is what i did....i actually had to remove most of the items off my registry b/c so many people wanted to buy gifts. And when people asked I told them not to be tacky but to be honest we got everything we need and more from our shower and engagment party and there isn't anything left on the registry. I think they will get the hint.
kslmbuggie
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Re: This may sound rude but .........
your better off telling them where you are registered, because at least then you will get something you want, otherwise they will get you what they like & you probably wont be able to return it.
do you have a close co-worker that can spread the word that you would like monetary gifts?
Nicky0503
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Re: This may sound rude but .........
Posted by Kimbalina
Where are these people from? or where are you that they think they are wrapping presents?
Mostly russians
Nicky0503
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Re: This may sound rude but .........
Posted by zoe282
This is what i did....i actually had to remove most of the items off my registry b/c so many people wanted to buy gifts. And when people asked I told them not to be tacky but to be honest we got everything we need and more from our shower and engagment party and there isn't anything left on the registry. I think they will get the hint.
You would think they would get the hint I said that and they said so we don't bring gifts ?
Nicky0503
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Re: This may sound rude but .........
Posted by kslmbuggie
your better off telling them where you are registered, because at least then you will get something you want, otherwise they will get you what they like & you probably wont be able to return it.
do you have a close co-worker that can spread the word that you would like monetary gifts?
I feel bad saying this but I might have too.
Kerin2804
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Re: This may sound rude but .........
FH & I attended a wedding on Saturday and yes, people gave wrapped gifts to the couple. Why would it matter if a person gave you money or a gift that you registered for ? There are attendants to take care of items and at the end of the evening have someone that will collect all of your belongings from the rh. In my family it has become a tradition to give a gift to a family member or close friends - china, crystal.
ant090608
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Re: This may sound rude but .........
I would register for more gifts that way you can return them and get credit. Doesn't BBB allow you to refund money back? If you don't register and they give you gifts on their own your stuck with unwanted gifts and you won't be able to return them.
Snick n Nick
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Re: This may sound rude but .........
Honestly we got wrapped gifts at the wedding and I had no idea until I saw them later on! The staff must have grabbed them and stowed them no problem! My parents went back the next morning to pick up all our stuff, and so we got them that day. It really wasn't bad at all! (granted we still got mostly envelopes...)
Nicky0503
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Re: This may sound rude but .........
It wouldn't really matter but I don't need anything every item came off my registry I even had to put thing s on there that I really didn't ned cause my mother told me to add things. When you live on your own for 15 years you really don't need much.
Nicky0503
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Re: This may sound rude but .........
Posted by ant090608
I would register for more gifts that way you can return them and get credit. Doesn't BBB allow you to refund money back? If you don't register and they give you gifts on their own your stuck with unwanted gifts and you won't be able to return them.
I already have $800 in gift cards from BBB and don't need anything else. I guess its not up to me.
Nicky0503
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Re: This may sound rude but .........
Posted by Kerin2804
FH & I attended a wedding on Saturday and yes, people gave wrapped gifts to the couple. Why would it matter if a person gave you money or a gift that you registered for ? There are attendants to take care of items and at the end of the evening have someone that will collect all of your belongings from the rh. In my family it has become a tradition to give a gift to a family member or close friends - china, crystal.
It is a nice idea but I guess it's just foreign to me cause I've never seen it.
kat124
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Re: This may sound rude but .........
it's not technically rude. I see your point, however itys a cultural thing and even though you don't mean to offend people you might.
In many Latin American countries a shower is unheard off. People dont register anywhere, you just bring the present to the wedding. This thing of bring Money to the wedding and presents to the shower is an American/European thing.
When I told my mother about the shower she was confused she had no idea what the hell I was talking about (she's old school Latina). Perhaps if you put someone in charge at the reception of collecting any presents people bring and then put them in your bridal suite until its time to leave.
My brother in law married a girl from El Salvador and I had to convince her that it was ok to have a shower and still expect people to bring money to the wedding.
Nicky0503
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Re: This may sound rude but .........
Posted by kat124
it's not technically rude. I see your point, however itys a cultural thing and even though you don't mean to offend people you might.
In many Latin American countries a shower is unheard off. People dont register anywhere, you just bring the present to the wedding. This thing of bring Money to the wedding and presents to the shower is an American/European thing.
When I told my mother about the shower she was confused she had no idea what the hell I was talking about (she's old school Latina). Perhaps if you put someone in charge at the reception of collecting any presents people bring and then put them in your bridal suite until its time to leave.
My brother in law married a girl from El Salvador and I had to convince her that it was ok to have a shower and still expect people to bring money to the wedding.
You are too funny but your right, I 'll just have to deal with it. It is my culture not theirs.
TrueLoveIn2008
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Re: This may sound rude but .........
Can you register for new items - like, things you would LOVE but thought they were too extravagant to register for? Maybe if you registered for a few big things, they would see that the registry's almost empty and go in on a few things together. I wouldn't worry about gifts at the wedding - your bridal attendant will take care of it. Worse comes to worst, the bridal attendant can make arrangements with a family member to put the gifts in a car at some point during the night.
KK Holiday
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Re: This may sound rude but .........
this may be a little sneaky but why not register at Bed Bath and Beyond? you get CASH back on all returns off your registry. this way if you dont want to keep something you can return it and get the money they spent on it.
