This Poll Goes With The Previous 4th Marriage Etiquette Post
I am a past bride. My older sister was my MOH and she did a wonderful job! Right after my wedding she announces to me that she is engaged to her bf of just 8 months and she would like me to be her MOH. This would all be fine except for the fact that my sister is 35 years old ,with 3 children and 3 failed marriages behind her. This wedding will be her fourth. I know that she wanted me to immediately be excited for her and to gush about how I could not wait to be her MOH, but I just couldn't do it because of her history of failed marriages, which she drags my niece and nephews through with her. It has been a merry-go-round of men in their lives and she can't understand why I am not so happy about this. I don't see why she needs to ever get married again. She already has her children and frankly, she just isn't good at marriage (obviously). This is made worse by the fact that she only knew the guy for 8 months before getting engaged.
Not only does she want be to be her MOH but she wants to pretend that this is her first marriage and she wants the whole big white wedding. She wants a shower, a bacherlorette party, has registered at 2 different stores for a china pattern and crystal among other things and has purchased a white wedding gown.
I am furious! I think this is completely inappropriate and embarrassing for my family. In my opinion, she should just go to the justice of the peace and be done with it with no big hoopla. The whole problem is that although she is my older sister by 7 years, she is vastly immature and I have pretty much taken on the big sister role by leading by example. She eloped for all 3 of her prior marriages, but after she saw my big white wedding and saw that you get wedding gifts and shower gifts and everyone makes a fuss, she wanted it.
When I tell her that a shower, bachelorette party and making me and others purchase bridesmaids gowns is just not done for a 4th marriage of a middle-aged woman with 3 children she gets mad and basically tells me that she deserves it because she didn't get any of that for her first 3 weddings. I know that she also feels that I 'owe her' because she was just MOH for me. So do I 'owe her' or is she really being just crazy? I have looked everywhere but really can't find much in the way of etiquette advice for 4th marriages so I am now going by opinions.
Not only does she want be to be her MOH but she wants to pretend that this is her first marriage and she wants the whole big white wedding. She wants a shower, a bacherlorette party, has registered at 2 different stores for a china pattern and crystal among other things and has purchased a white wedding gown.
I am furious! I think this is completely inappropriate and embarrassing for my family. In my opinion, she should just go to the justice of the peace and be done with it with no big hoopla. The whole problem is that although she is my older sister by 7 years, she is vastly immature and I have pretty much taken on the big sister role by leading by example. She eloped for all 3 of her prior marriages, but after she saw my big white wedding and saw that you get wedding gifts and shower gifts and everyone makes a fuss, she wanted it.
When I tell her that a shower, bachelorette party and making me and others purchase bridesmaids gowns is just not done for a 4th marriage of a middle-aged woman with 3 children she gets mad and basically tells me that she deserves it because she didn't get any of that for her first 3 weddings. I know that she also feels that I 'owe her' because she was just MOH for me. So do I 'owe her' or is she really being just crazy? I have looked everywhere but really can't find much in the way of etiquette advice for 4th marriages so I am now going by opinions.
