Time Between Family Weddings?? HELP!!!!

We got engaged in August of this year and knew that we wanted to get married in August Sept or Oct of 2002. My brother got engaged in November and asked what dates we had in mind. We told him the above. They found a place right away and set the date for Sept 2002. With this is mind, we began planning a May 2002 wedding so that they would not be so close together. But now due to financial reasons, we need to push the wedding off. We want to do it in August as originally planed. We dont want to have to wait until 2003 to get married. Do you think having the weddings one month apart is a bad idea? I have thought about family and how rough it may be on them. There are not too many people that have to travel very far so that part is okay. I guess I am thinking financially...PLEASE HELP!! I am also thinking about speaking to her. My MOH told me, dont worry about it - do what you want, you were engaged first, but I cant look at it like that. HELP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

My Opinion

This is a tough one-- my family has gone through this at 3 different times with 3 weddings each time--We have a big Italian family-- The last time being my wedding-- as far as finances go-- either way the guests that will be attending both weddings will be spending the same amount of money so in my mind timing is not an issue (when they have a year to plan for it) with our wedding it was my cousin who had problems with the whole thing-- she got engaged in July wedding was May (2 years later) we didnt get engaged till Feb and planned for the following April-- our issue was we had 4 other weddings to plan around--so we did the best we could-- my biggest piece of advice is to talk about it-- that is what helped us-- good luck Laura

My Opinion

I got engaged in April 2000 -- planned our wedding for September 2001. One of my cousins had gotten engaged before me but kept changing her wedding date. After I picked mine in Sept, she picked an October date. Then she changed it to July. Then her sister got engaged last December and picked a May wedding date. So her's was in May, my other cousins was in July and mine was in September. It was a bit crazy -- but you really can't worry about everyone else -- you're probably thinking about it more than the others. And if you don't have too many guests coming from out of town I don't think it's that big of a deal. Good Luck and don't stress over it too much!

My Opinion

This is just my opinion. You should wait until after your brother's wedding to get married. I think it might be very difficult on your families, financially speaking. To give two gifts, have two showers, etc.. all within a few weeks of each other. How about a July wedding? That would give you a bit more time, and still give the families some time too. Or else, maybe March 2003. It sounds far away but when you are saving and planning it goes by quick.

Don't over-think this...

In my opinion, you were engaged first, so you should not be stressing about this at all. Pick your date based upon what will make you the happiest. Your family will understand the timing. I disagree with Michele31 - you should not plan your wedding to everyone else's financial convenience. If that is the case, there would never be a good time for an expensive proposition, like a wedding. The idea is to celebrate a marriage, not see which family member can gather the fatest checks. Your family will be happy to get together and celebrate such happy occasions. They have a year to plan ahead...that's plenty of time to allow for any overlap. Best of luck to you!

Time Between Family Weddings?? HELP!!!!

I don't think you should change your wedding date because of your brother. As I see it, he wronged you, since he asked you when you were getting married, and then picked one of the months you chose! Anyway, lets not nit-pick. If you go ahead with August(which I think you should) you should send out Save the Date cards, this way the family knows when both weddings are, and that they will need to plan accordingly.

It was just my opinion

But they both had dates chosen and now she wants to change it. I do think it will be financial difficult, especially on close family. But I think the most important thing is that the family discuss the situation openly and honestly that way everyone understands. Maybe your family will think its great and then there will be no problems.

It was just my opinion

We still have not officially set a date as of yet. After my brother announced his Sept date, when we began looking around we kept this in mind and figured May would be a better date than August because we didnt want them to be so close. I have yet to talk to my future sis in law, but we'll she what she says. I dont think it would be a problem - so long as family knows ahead of time.... and I will send out Save The Date cards. THANKS FOR THE GREAT FEEDBACK!!!!!