Totally bummed....cancer sux

I just received an email from my best friend of 25 years that her father has lung cancer & it has already spread to one of his lymph nodes. I haven't even replied yet because I haven't got a clue as to what to say. This man was such a huge part of my life gowing up, took us to Yankee games, the beach anywhere we wanted to go. I can't even believe that this is happening..

Sorry to be a downer, but could use a little bit of advice on how to respond without upsetting her more.

my heart is breaking. this is terrible terrible news.

Omg, I'm so sorry Tara!!!!!!!!!!!!

I have no words to offer except to promise that you'll be there for whatever she needs.

I'm so sorry.

You should simply tell her that as her friend you are there for her. Whenever wherever - period. That's all she'll need to hear.

im soooo sorry. i dont knw what to say sweeite except that her dad is an awesome man and that you wil be there for her whatever she needs. sometimes just calling her and letting her chat about her dad is a good distraction.

im so sorry that you and your friend are going through this.....life ***** sometimes

Sometimes there is nothing that you can say.
Sometimes the best thing that you can offer is your time --- to listen, to be there whenever she needs it.

I'm so sorry.

I agree about listening & offering support, but it also depends on your friend, too.

When I found out my Mom had cancer I didn't want anyone's sympathy or pity or 'feeling bad' and I didn't want people asking me about her all the time. If I had something I wanted to share, I would share it, so although I liked when people asked 'How's your Mom' meaning I liked that they had her in their thoughts, I didn't want to sit there & describe what doctors she saw & what treatments she was having & all that, so if I answered “she’s doing OK…Thanks for asking” leave it, don’t ask more ?’s like “Well, what’s going on, any news…” If I wanted to tell you I would. Just my experience…

For you and your friend’s dad & family

Cancer sux...

Sorry to hear this Beanie...

All you can really do is offer your friend a shoulder to cry on and emotional support by listening and being there for her...

Oh Beanie that sux!!! I am sorry to hear that!!

My good friend's mother died of it last year (at 46)...it also spread to her lymph nodes...she went within 3 months....it was so hard to see it....she spend 1 month in the hospital and then 2 weeks at home (hospice)

Be prepared for a battle....be very strong for your friend...she will need you....

Sorry to hear this Beans. My FIL died of lung cancer 2 years ago. It is a terrible thing to witness. Just be a good friend and listen when she needs to talk or cry. That is all you can do.

Many hugs and prayers for all.

just let her know you are there. that you love her, you love her dad, and anything she needs is a done deal.

I'm so sorry to hear this sweets. He will remain in my thoughts and prayers.

I cannot say anything that hasn't already been stated - but be there for her.

I am very sorry to hear about your friends father. Coincidently, I am currently going through this right now..with my husbands gramndmother passing away three days ago of cancer. The advice I have for you is to just be there for her and her family.. listen to her, be a shoulder to cry on, be helpful in anyway you can.

Thanks everyone They all seem to be hopeful & in good spirits.

Sorry Tara. Just being there for your friend is the best thing you can do. I just went thru the same thing with my best friend of 25 yrs as well with her mom.

Maybe ask your friend what she needs?
Meaning, does she need to talk or be quiet? Does she want you to ask/check in regularly or wait for her to tell you? Hang out and be together or alone time.....etc.

And of course, letting her know that you will try to honor what she needs.

iim so sorry beans...
i hate cancer too-

we actually had a scare w/ginzos father a couple of weeks ago

Yes - my stepsister died from cancer 6 years ago - cancer is terrible - I am very sorry....