Totally Distraught

Try to relax, give him a little time to cool down.

Think about what's important here, you are getting married, making a profound life long commitment to eachother, that is the most important part of the day not the hall, flowers, favors...

This is all JMHO, but do you really want to start your married life in a place that was the source of such anxiety and disagreement? It is HIS wedding too and if he doesn't like EW I think you should agree to keep looking.

I can also understand why he'd be so upset, although I'm sure it was NEVER the intention, he probably feels like you and your Mom ganged up on him.

I hope it all works out and that you feel better. I'm so sorry you are going through this. We've had so much fun with the planning, maybe you guys should re-address your priorities and try to compromise and work together on it all rather than let it be a battle.

I have not heard a word from him all day and I am afraid to call.....

well I would personally call him up and just say 'honey, are we really going to let everything go for a meaningless argument, let's start over and do everything together and agree together'...you know stuff like that so at least you can get over this hump.

What do you think?

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Posted by QueensBride

well I would personally call him up and just say 'honey, are we really going to let everything go for a meaningless argument, let's start over and do everything together and agree together'...you know stuff like that so at least you can get over this hump.

What do you think?

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I agree. It would worry me that he even threatened to call it off after a relatively minor argument. It should be about love--go elope if you want! But I don't consider calling it off anything to joke about--and he shouldn't play with your emotions like that unless he means it. And if he does than you need to call him and talk! Good luck!

FI and I have not totally agreed on the halls that we have seen but it has not escalated to an argument....although I was PISSED when he said he liked Fox Hollow better than Milleridge Cottage. LOL LOL It was based on the video presentation and I told him he could not possibly think he liked it based on just the video and w/o seeing the place in person. LOL

We ended up going back to Fox Hollow that same night to see it in person and it was nice and more modern than Milleridge.

If you really did throw a tantrum 'like a 4 year old' you should apologize though. It is important that we include the guys in the process although many of my friends personally say that 'FI does not get it - he has no choices.' That is totally not true though. He already picked the centerpieces and the invitations he wants. And we are both deciding on the hall.

This whole process is just very stressful. FI and I have NEVER had an argument but this process has made me come close. Not sure if you called him or not but this will blow over.

Any updates on the situation now that its 7ish?


sorry for your situation

Well we never went to look at the Carltun. We are going tonight to look at East Wind.

I'll keep you all in the loop. Thanks, you girls are so much fun and helpful.

Good Luck and keep us posted. We have all had our share of fights. Just keep your cool. I should listen to my own advice. I am a scorpio and i can get CRAZY on his ***.. LOL

Try to enjoy your night sweetie.......

We went through a similar thing with moms getting involved when we were hall shopping too. Although it only sparked a brief argument between FH and I, we decided that from now on we would limit any conversations between him and his mother (the emotional party) to 10 minutes when they concern wedding subjects that they don't agree on. Then they have to agree to disagree. No fights allowed during what is supposed to be a really fun experience!

Before you continue the process though, you really should sit down and discuss what is most important to you. I think he has a good point about being considerate to oot guests. That was a major criterion for us...we didn't even look at places further than Western Suffolk. We also nixed out-of-the-way places on the north shore for that reason. Still, for us it was about unpredictable February weather...you won't have that situation in September. Set your list of priorities, then agree to do EVERYTHING together! Good luck!!!!

I think you should go with him to see all of the places he wants to see as well. - You may find something you like better, someplace that will give you a better deal etc.
I was dead set on the Milleridge Cottage and FH dragged me kicking and screaming the Watermill and as soon as I walked in I was like 'ok this is it' .......
You have to compromise with him too.....I know it's hard b/c in the back of your head you're thinking GOD you're not supposed to CARE !!!

He was BLOWN away with the Estate at East Wind...... YAY.

Tuesday we go back with mom to make the fianl decision. NO MORE FIGHTING!

ANA, so glad to hear things worked out. I knew if you gave him a little time to cool off, he'd realize you were just stressed out, as is he, and would come around.

It's funny how when men fight, the first thing they want to do is break up. Like you can't just fight and make up. :)

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Posted by ANA6178

He was BLOWN away with the Estate at East Wind...... YAY.

Tuesday we go back with mom to make the fianl decision. NO MORE FIGHTING!

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Alright!!!!!!

Don't you love it when they finally agree???