trying to decide between dates, please help

eternitybride Posted: Oct 12, 2007 09:26 PM

trying to decide between dates, please help

Hi ladies,

Here is the situation, FH and I are planning a wedding for 2010, in January. Now he is saying if we are able to push it to 2009, to do it. The hall we like is 65 per person for either year, 73 with an upgrade, I am just trying to decide wihch is better.

I am in my final year of law school, Bar in July, he is in his final year of his bachelors, then looking to start a PHD in Genetics. We can find a way to make 2009 work, it might be pushing it, but we could.

Looking for advice, stay with 2010 and save some more money, or push for 2009 and do more of it ourselves. Eitherway, budget is around 20k, somehow, hoping for around 15k.

TIA for any and all advice

oldladybride Posted: Oct 12, 2007 09:53 PM

Re: trying to decide between dates, please help

First thing I thought of when I saw the 2010 date and wanting to push it up is what will that cost you more in filing a 2009 JOINT tax return. Add that to your calcs too!
What is his reasoning for moving it early? Personally, alot of girls on here say they enjoyed the time leading up to the wedding and doing projects etc and taking time to look for the dress. . . if you move the date up you lose some of that 'luxury' time plus there is enough stress without adding more by the need to budget more and diy more and establish yourself in your careers, take Bar exam etc.
So I would vote to leave it as planned.
HTH

xBrunette Posted: Oct 12, 2007 09:59 PM

Re: trying to decide between dates, please help

i say wait it out.. and save more money... you want to be able to concentrate on school more... then little by little you can start planning your wedding... FH finished school.. and i just went back... i want to finish school before i get married... i want to get settled and save up more before i spent it all.. =)

Daisy Bride Posted: Oct 13, 2007 12:25 AM

Re: trying to decide between dates, please help

I don't know if I could wait that long but that's just me. We were only engaged for 10 months. One way I wish we had more time to save & make things myself but on the other hand, it was such a crazy time & I was relieved when it was over. I think you should stick to 09 unless your FH really wants to wiat then I guess you have to compromise. Good luck. Let us know what you decide

bensgirl Posted: Oct 13, 2007 07:05 AM

Re: trying to decide between dates, please help

hmmm...my instinct is to say do it earlier! we got engaged in march and we are getting married next may and i feel its too long. i will be honest......wedding planning is fun and exciting, but its also stressful. especially on a budget....our wedding is going to cost us about what you plan to spend. i am finding that the stress is just dragging out! i booked all my big vendors within the first two months of being engaged and now i feel like i'm just 'waiting' for our wedding. i'm glad we have the extra time to save, but sometimes i think we could've done it sooner--we would've just had to be even more strict with our money. we've found that weddings make people act in ways you can't even imagine (family, friends, etc) and this waiting time gives people more time to act out their drama.

i hope that doesn't sound negative my MOH planned her wedding in 10 months and it was lovely and amazing and she was rarely stressed out about it. i say go for 2009!!!

BunnyBears Posted: Oct 13, 2007 07:25 AM

Re: trying to decide between dates, please help

i was in my last semester of grad school when we got engaged and now studying for the state license for social worker. i cant wait till the test is over so i can focus more on the wedding. its been stressful to do both. there will always be something to do of course but the more time u have maybe the more u can enjoy it. i feel rushed. and so busy with other things that its ruining my fun.

Chanwich Posted: Oct 13, 2007 11:06 AM

Re: trying to decide between dates, please help

I was in the same boat...started with an 08 date but ended up pushing it back to 09. Honestly, if you can save money and have your dream wedding a little later, I think its worth it. You may be able to afford a lot of things you couldn't, or could save for a house at the same time, etc. But 2009 is still pretty far away, so you can see where you are next year and maybe make a decision then.

I've also almost have a Ph.D. in genetics, so if your FH needs any help, let me know.

rocketsummer17 Posted: Oct 13, 2007 11:19 AM

Re: trying to decide between dates, please help

If you both want to push it up and go for a 2009 wedding why not go towards the end of 09...that way you still have time to save more money!
FH and I had originally planned on an early 09 wedding but realized that we could do it bigger and better if we waited until 2010. I also have an ASCP and NYS licensing exams that I need to worry about so we figured to give more time, save more money and have less stress...
But, I do have to say everyone has different opinions about their weddings and what they want for it, so the decision is entirley up to you and FH....good luck deciding!! let us know what happens!!

bluegreen08 Posted: Oct 13, 2007 12:33 PM

Re: trying to decide between dates, please help

Posted by oldladybride

First thing I thought of when I saw the 2010 date and wanting to push it up is what will that cost you more in filing a 2009 JOINT tax return. Add that to your calcs too!

Never thought about that... does it always cost more to file jointly?

Summertimegal424 Posted: Oct 13, 2007 12:35 PM

Re: trying to decide between dates, please help

whats the wait got to hurt, your gonna be w/ this man for the rest of your life right???

krisa1129 Posted: Oct 14, 2007 12:18 AM

Re: trying to decide between dates, please help

It is a decision you both have to make...but I would probably want to make it earlier....but than again, I am done with school.....

Good luck with your decision!

donegal419 Posted: Oct 14, 2007 12:58 AM

Re: trying to decide between dates, please help

i would say go for it.... me, i couldn't wait to get marrried. waiting another year would have killed me....but we also weren't living together, so if you are, that might not be an issue....

i was a winter wedding as well and honestly, i think it will be MORE expensive if you wait. halls and vendors raise their prices every year, so it will end up costing more if you wait.... but then again, if you need the time to save, that may be another factor to think about.

we had a winter wedding with 170 people for under $20K... it is possible! we had it at a nice hall, had a band and i don't feel like i sacrificed anything. i had almost everything i wanted and we had a great day.

overall, a wedding is only a DAY! to me, it is not worth waiting another year or more to be married to someone you love to save money on a DAY! it is over in 8 hours....yes, was it great...did i love it, of course...but if i were in your shoes, icould not wait that long....

040508Bride Posted: Oct 14, 2007 01:06 AM

Re: trying to decide between dates, please help

I am getting married in April...I am graduating this december....my boards are in January. During this time, I am graduating, house hunting, studying, applying for jobs, getting married, passing a test, getting a job....training....it's a lot. Get married when you can do it without as much pressure as I am under lol...TRUST me...