My mom is the only woman in the world i know who LOVES cleaning. I mean some days cleaning certain things relaxes me but she LOVES cleaning. She actually cleans houses for people every now and then because it relaxes her plus its extra money that she calls her secret money to use as she pleases. My dad doesn´t want her cleaning houses because it can take a toll on your body and he wants her to not work so hard. (She also works at a school and takes some college classes - alhtough not this semester)
So when she does it she doesn´t want him to know. Sometimes she makes up stuff like she has a baby shower to go to or something like that when its on a day that he´s home. We (my sisters and I) always say she acts like she´s cheating on him. But her excuse is that why would she cause unnecesary arguments.
So all that is to bring me to my question . . .
Is there anything that you prefer not to tell FH inorder to avoid arguments? Or do you believe that 'honesty is always the best policy'?
JennandAnthony
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I cant keep anything from fh, I try but Im not good at it and he always finds out and causes an argument, so I have been going with honesty, unless im shopping for him
MrsSx2
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My secret from FH is.....besides the 2 credit cards we have together...I still have 2 emergency credit cards...'just in case'. :) This is a major secret because as a banker, he is like a hawk over our money. I came into out relationship with some debt that he helped clear up. I don't use them, but they're there...just in case
Other than that.....'filtered' honesty is the best policy..for us anyway!
MrsC2010
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i pretty much tell him everything....i think its better that way
AdriandSteve
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That's awesome imo that your mom does all that!
I think there are always small things that you can keep from FH and DH that are fine. Buying things for yourself here and there and not telling the EXACT amount (as long as it's not financially killing you two) and other little things are ok.
I couldn't do this though. I tell FH everything even if I don't want to. I'm horrible at keeping a secret.
halfbaked
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Hmph, I was just thinking about this the other day and thinking it would be a good QOTD! LOL!
The only time I could ever remember lying to FH was when this attorney at work was harassing me. I'm a receptionist and I used to work the late shift 12-8 PM so I'd be by myself from 5-8. Well this attorney from Chicago made a habit of visiting and not showing up until about 4 o'clock. He's very high maintenance- when he comes into the office it's like a whirlwind of demands. Since everyone else in my dept. is either dumb as rocks or doesn't care enough about their job to make an effort, he grew accustomed to working with me and me alone. Then he'd start to hang out by my desk at night, invite me to dinner, leave me his hotel room number despite the fact that I'd always decline. And it just got worse and worse to the point where I had to go to my boss. So when they switched my hours, I didn't tell FH at first because he's very hotheaded. I was worried he'd do something stupid or just react very badly. I told him a few months later and he was upset but he understood why I didn't tell him in the first place.
flibbertigibbet
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this situation with your mom could be different. does your dad feel like her working too much makes her cranky? does she work so much shes not at home with him enough?
on the surface, i'm like... *** she likes doing it and she is making money. awesome. good for her.
but i can see how some couples would fight about this. for the reasons explained below.
like sometimes i work on the side right now to make extra money for the wedding.
sometimes FH does too. but if he was working extra someplace on top of the regular work week and the insane amount of time he spends doing school work at home.... and i found out he was pocketing the money for play money - i'd be sort of annoyed. especially now because we NEED the money.
but i'm pretty old school. i sort of feel like if something you're doing would upset your spouse - you maybe shouldn't do it. and if you WANT to do it... you should figure out why it would upset the other person and talk it out until it doesn't upset them anymore?
RGEC47
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I really don't keep things from FH. If I try, I end up getting caught, because I will forget what I told him and he catches it. So to avoid arguing and embarrasement, I just tell him.
StaceyWill
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I pretty much tell him everything.
jackieee
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No. I like to keep it real with him. I'm a horrible liar and I feel guilty lying, so I tell him everything. He feels the same.
Sometimes it might cause a little fight, but I prefer telling him the truth always. I want us to both always be real with each other and straight up, even if the other doesn't like the truth.
FutureCap
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we tell each other everything!
Its2Snappy
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I tell him pretty much everything that has to do with me, however, if one of my friends tells me something in confidence, I don't share it. So, that's pretty much the only time I'd keep something from in, or if I was surprising him. LOL.
kris_gets_hitched
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I pretty much tell him everything, unless a) I'm planning a surprise for him or b) a friend swore me to secrecy about something and telling FH would not affect the situation at all.
cateydee
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i pretty much tell him everything except that i got a parking ticket today on his car.
Nina1010
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I don't tell him everything about my family to avoid sarcastic commentary that can leave to a fight. Not to keep secrets though. Otherwise, honesty all the way.
christine2010
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i can not keep anything from FH. he knows me like a book.
the one time i kept something from him was the actual time my class started. we both had class at school but for the entire semester i told him that my class started 10 minutes before his so we would get to school early. i like to be early & he likes to be just on time. it was the last day of class & i was running late & i slipped up & said don't worry class doesn't start until 10 after 4. he gave me such an evil stare.
