Uck! xpost

So I found out last night that FH's brother (who is also a groomsman) will def be in afganistan for the wedding.

This ***** for a number of reason.

1. We want him there (main and most important reason obv)

2. I'm not sure if his wife will still come because they live in NC and she has two very small children she'd be travelling alone with.

3. His son is one of our ring bearers so we may be short if the whole family doesn't come.

4. my bridal party is now uneven.

5. It just s ucks.



Any ideas of how to incorporate him in the wedding without making it look like a memorial?

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Posted by meg922

Could you have him videotape a toast to be played at the reception?

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I'm not really close to him (I've been with FH 6 years and I can count on 1 hand how many times I've seen him because he lives in NC plus he's always in some foreign country for the army) so I'm not really sure what I would ask him to say - or even how to ask him. He doesn't really know me either.

FH has 3 brothers, and he's close with the other 2... this one he's not so close with because of the distance thing.

SIL's husband was in afghanistan at the time of our wedding last year. There really wasn't anything that could be done about it. Her two young children were still in our wedding party (RB and FG) and they came up from NC for the wedding... kinda sounds familiar.

Of course, it was SIL who was here and her parents of course came (since they're my ILs) so that was helpful. I honestly wish I'd invited her husband's mom too -- she's really awesome and I think it would've been fun to have her. But that's neither here nor there at this point.

My father gave a toast at our reception and he started out by saying 'before I talk about the happy couple, I want to recognize someone who isn't here with us today but who is currently serving our country in the army in afghanistan, and that's SIL's husband, B...' -- He said a few more things, too.

When BIL was in town recently, he got to watch the video and was actually pretty touched by my dad's speech. It was a great way to include him even though he couldn't be there.

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Posted by springsandra

SIL's husband was in afghanistan at the time of our wedding last year. There really wasn't anything that could be done about it. Her two young children were still in our wedding party (RB and FG) and they came up from NC for the wedding... kinda sounds familiar.

Of course, it was SIL who was here and her parents of course came (since they're my ILs) so that was helpful. I honestly wish I'd invited her husband's mom too -- she's really awesome and I think it would've been fun to have her. But that's neither here nor there at this point.

My father gave a toast at our reception and he started out by saying 'before I talk about the happy couple, I want to recognize someone who isn't here with us today but who is currently serving our country in the army in afghanistan, and that's SIL's husband, B...' -- He said a few more things, too.

When BIL was in town recently, he got to watch the video and was actually pretty touched by my dad's speech. It was a great way to include him even though he couldn't be there.

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so your SIL is your DH's sister? Or is the one in the army his brother?

See my FH's brother is in the army, so I'm not really sure if SIL will come by herself with two tiny kids -

I really do like the idea of including it in a speech - but I'm not really sure who would include him. I guess maybe I could ask the best man?



please keep the suggestions coming!

I'm sorry to hear that.