The ironic thing is, almost every single table was easy to put together!!!
I had just one issue....my friends tables. I have so many people coming single. Then I have my work friends. My non-work friends came to 13. Obviously could not put 13 at a table.
My work friends came to 11 people. My poor friend has to come without her husband- she almost didn't come because of it! Just the fact that she told me she was considering not coming REALLY hurt me. But she finally came around.
So as you can see, I have one table of 13, one of 11.
I was not about to split my non-work friends table at 6 and 7. Just for one odd person?!
So this is what I did....I split up my work friends. There's a group of girls that I have lunch with and I kept them together (that includes the one person coming without her husband). Then I added a few of my own non-work friends. That makes a 12 person table.
The other table has the 'other' work friends - the 'younger' contingency that are really close. Then I added my non-work friends. Makes that 12.
Numbers-wise, it's a slam dunk. (Or should I say home run? OMG even in my stress I can still be cheesy )
But I worry about my one lone friend...I can see this bugging her. She'd probably resent she's at a table mixed with friends with strangers when she's alone.
Should I even care? This is the type of thing that would bother her. I love her but she is hella sensitive. I mean, the fact that she told me she might not come because of her husband really blew me away. It bothered her that much.
So...should I forewarn her? Call her, email her? UGH!
Or...should I split my non-friends to tables of 7 and 6 and have a work table of 11?
My sister says I shouldn't be worrying for ONE person! But I know you girls would understand....
Re: Ugh tell me this is nothing to stress over....
Honestly, I think splitting up your work friends is fine. As long as your friend is sitting with your 'group' from work, she should be fine. If you were putting her completely by herself then yeah, she'd probably get annoyed - but if she has a problem sitting with work people and non work people, well, then no offense, but she needs to get over herself! It's a wedding, part of the fun is mingling with new people!!
And btw, you're a good friend for even worrying about her!
GettinHutched
Posted:
Member since
Re: Ugh tell me this is nothing to stress over....
I still could see her being bothered by it!
I agree she DOES need to get over herself! I almost said that to her when she said she might not come to the wedding because she'd be alone! I jokingly said 'Well it's okay, no one will be looking at you anyway!'
I agree, the mingling would be fun! But I could just see her being bothered that her 'other' friends are at the other table. She hangs out with them too - but this separation made the most sense. UGH this stuff S U C K S.
Thanks for listening and being supportive! My family is done with this discussion!
Re: Ugh tell me this is nothing to stress over....
Hmmmm.....I had this exact problem at my batmitzvah. I had to split a few friends up, and one of them was an uber pain in the *** - she locked herself in the bathroom and cried for half an hour!! Girls!!!!! Ugh!
Ok, totally didn't mean to tell you that to freak you out! But honestly, your friend really really needs to get over herself. I know it's so much easier said than done, but come on! It's a wedding - a SOCIAL event. Part of me says that you should tell her, just to give her a heads up. But then part of me says why bother? She'll be sitting with friends, what does it matter if it's 3 of them or 6 of them? This isn't a work event - it's YOUR wedding!
And it's not stupid at all - I would feel the same way. But really, I'm sure you have 8 million more important things to do! If she can't suck it up for one night, then f^ck her!!
ETA - fixed a spelling mistake!
GettinHutched
Posted:
Member since
Re: Ugh tell me this is nothing to stress over....
You got that right!! Thanks so much!!
Ugh the ridiculous things we stress over that will mean NOTHING the very next day!
Re: Ugh tell me this is nothing to stress over....
No problem! I hope everything works out!!
VadersBride2006
Posted:
Member since
Re: Ugh tell me this is nothing to stress over....
If you see her every day anyway, maybe you can casually mention to her 'I know you are upset about your husband not being able to attend the wedding. Is there someone specific you would like to sit with to make it a little more comfortable?' If you know she is sitting with one person she requested, then you shouldn't really have to worry too much about the rest of the table.
Just an idea...
cookiemonster
Posted:
Member since
Re: Ugh tell me this is nothing to stress over....
Tara, your wedding is going to be so much fun that nobody is going to be sitting down for very long anyway!! Plus, every wedding I've ever been to where I've had friends at multiple tables, we've all kind of played musical chairs the whole night. Don't worry about your friend - she'll have a blast. A few glasses of wine makes everything better!!
tricia3381
Posted:
Member since
Re: Ugh tell me this is nothing to stress over....
i wouldn't worry about it. BTW- why isn't her hubby coming?
GettinHutched
Posted:
Member since
Re: Ugh tell me this is nothing to stress over....
Posted by tricia3381
i wouldn't worry about it. BTW- why isn't her hubby coming?
He has a golf tournament that weekend....and he's the type of guy that does NOT back down when there's something he wants to do.
Thanks everyone! Hopefully I'll get over it!
Jennifer907
Posted:
Member since
Re: Ugh tell me this is nothing to stress over....
It's nothing to stress over! Honestly, I would leave the tables the way you have them and not even mention it. The only time people sit at their assigned table anyway is to eat. Other than that, she'll be moving around talking to people and dancing.
Tobewed07
Posted:
Member since
Re: Ugh tell me this is nothing to stress over....
Posted by Jennifer907
It's nothing to stress over! Honestly, I would leave the tables the way you have them and not even mention it. The only time people sit at their assigned table anyway is to eat. Other than that, she'll be moving around talking to people and dancing.
Exactly what I was going to say!
mycrayon1
Posted:
Member since
Re: Ugh tell me this is nothing to stress over....
This is nothing to stress over at all!!! Lokk at this way, all of your friends are coming to havea good time and celebrate YOUR marriage! Not worry about who you sat them with. They won't be sitting for very long anyway. I had the same problem and it worked out and everyone had a blast. HTH
HelenZ
Posted:
Member since
Re: Ugh tell me this is nothing to stress over....
I think you're already being really considerate by splitting the groups so at least there are still people at each table that know each other. I wouldn't forewarn her, b/c honestly there's still people at her table that she'll know, so she shouldn't get too sensitive about it (of course this is me saying that without knowing her)....she's married already, she should know that sometimes you are forced to integrate certain tables. I wouldn't bother mentioning it to her now, b/c if she says she has a problem with it then that will only cause you more stress!!
JessMxPx88
Posted:
Member since
Re: Ugh tell me this is nothing to stress over....
I would email her and explain the situation just to give her a heads up since she is sensitive. But I think your plan is the best thing to do. I had to do the same thing with my work friends and my non-work friends bc I ended up with a table of 13. So I had to split each group in half and mix them up so I could get a table without 13...
Dont worry about it...this is something you REALLY should not be stressed out about. If you give your friend warning and she's still upset, oh well! Too bad! You cant make everybody happy when making up the seating chart. Just do it the way you want and dont be worried about wether or not people will be happy.
MrsQ-in2007
Posted:
Member since
Re: Ugh tell me this is nothing to stress over....
Tara, I think you set up the tables the best way - do NOT stress over this!
HamptonsBride
Posted:
Member since
Re: Ugh tell me this is nothing to stress over....
Ok this is going to sound mean, but is she 12??? She can't function w/o her husband??? OMG she has to go to a wedding alone??? Yeah, it's always nice to have a date but get over it! Jeez...I've gone to babyshowers where i only knew the Mom to be...several weddings alone when DH lived in Israel.....don't worry about one person...it's nice your concerned but she needs to learn how to be an adult...(sorry if i sound mean..it just drives me nuts when women depend on men so much and feel they can't do stuff w/o them)
erdbeere
Posted:
Member since
Re: Ugh tell me this is nothing to stress over....
noo don't stress over this! She can seriously suck it up for one evening and I am sure she'll have plenty of people to talk to. Besides, its not like she has to be glued to that tabel all night..she should be out on the dance floor or mingling with others most of the time...she just has to get through dinner.
PeteysBride
Posted:
Member since
Re: Ugh tell me this is nothing to stress over....
Tara I think you are fine honestly. The only thing I would say is make sure that the people she sits with are talkative and friendlly and will drag her into convo even if it is kicking and screaming. I had a similar situation and actually put my best friend's sister at a diff table than her with another friend of mine from work because they are easy going girls and said they didnt mind 'working the room' with folks who were quiet. So I sat them beside my quieter friends who are shy. Not like anyone will really be sitting except when eating. We're latinas lol We dance!
I think you're fine. If she is THAT sensitive, she will be no matter what you do so dont break your head over it.
Kara and Todd
Posted:
Member since
Re: Ugh tell me this is nothing to stress over....
Honestly? STOP STRESSING OVER IT!
As long as people are sitting with at least a couple people they know, they will be FINE!
They won't spend a terrible amount of time at the tables anyway, so they'll be able to spend lots of time with the people they know.
