**Update: I just spent the last two hours (im pmsing majorly) crying to my mom and fh.. Its the rest of the family... if we have it in NY and DONT invite them i think it will cause MORE of a war than having it in Disney!!!!!! My uncle is manager of MGM and said he can get us a deal there as well for 50 guests...(I must have chewed his ear off tonight...
fmil says 'If you have a wedding in NY your going to go broke' my mom says'Its your wedding do what you want, all that matters is the bride and groom' and fh says 'I want the fireworks at disney'
But, I am THEE most sensitive person so all I keep saying to fh is 'But your family will be so upset'
He doesnt care. He said its all about us, no one else....
And I know everyone is saying 'Okay so do it' But those of you who are as sensitive as me know in my head I will keep thinking about those 'others' lol....
Thank you though girlies.... The vote stands for DISNEY<3
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So, more confusion (and I hoped 08 would bring me LESS drama)
Yesterday both families made it clear that getting married in florida makes it impossible for those who do not fly to go....
so my answer was, 1. get over your fear or 2. take the train.... of course I didnt say it tothem, but I said it to one of my bms...
They agree...however...both sides, although still not admitting that were engaged until they see the ring... are putting their noses in now saying that florida is not a good idea. That our 40 person wedding is rediculous and a waste of money. That we should just get married in NY so we can invite THE WHOLE family...
fhs sil and brother had a 330 person wedding. I almost died. $78,000!!!!!!!!!!!!!! They waited 8 years to get married and his brother is now 33... I cant do that. I mentally can not stay in my house that long to afford a wedding that is THAT big when I hate peoplelooking at me as it is!!!
So, the outcome is:
Keep the 09 wedding in Disney or Chang to 2010 and spend triple....
i want number one... but whats going to happen with family...i dont know if i can handle as much as a hole in my bank
babieblueeyez96
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Re: change my dream wedding to please everyone else?
i say keep the 09 wedding if that is what you want, however, i have dealt with family issues as well, so i know that is easier said then done...good luck with your decision!
little34
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F the people who are scared to fly....get over it. It is understandable that not everyone will be able to make it...my cousin is getting married in California and I am just not spending the money to get there and that is my choice....the people who don't want to go usually aren't that important so let them send you a gift!
You do what you want to do and what makes you happy. Unless they want to shovel out the $80,000 so you can get married in NY and invite everyone and their mothers they have no say. DO IT IN DISNEY!
Summertimegal424
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Re: change my dream wedding to please everyone else?
why can't you just have an 09 wedding in NY?
Ann 52409
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Is there anyway that you can have your dream wedding at Disney and have a nice dinner/ small reception in NY for the people that wont fly.
I def. dont suggest spending triple and waiting until 2010 to please other people. I think that is stupid... It's YOUR wedding
beram63
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IMO, there comes a point when you have to put your foot down with people who are not contributing. i can be the most easy going gal around when i'm not paying for it, but a wedding is never a good reason to put yourselves in debt. do what you can afford and what's going to make you happy.
AugustBridein09
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hmmmm this is hard......I used to want a Disney wedding too but then I decided NY would be most convenient for all plus I wanted a much bigger wedding than 40 ppl.......but $78,000!?!?!?!?!!? for 330ppl!!!!
Why don't you do a NY wedding w/ abt 200 ppl for a lot less!!!!!! Maybe like $35,000-$40,000????
Hope this is a little helpful
little34
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Posted by UKsunshine
hmmmm this is hard......I used to want a Disney wedding too but then I decided NY would be most convenient for all plus I wanted a much bigger wedding than 40 ppl.......but $78,000!?!?!?!?!!? for 330ppl!!!!
Why don't you do a NY wedding w/ abt 200 ppl for a lot less!!!!!! Maybe like $35,000-$40,000????
Hope this is a little helpful
but could you even do a NY wedding with only 200 pp?? It seems like if you do have it here the family will be telling who to invite and then you have the issue of the guest list...I think your best option is to do it in Disney. If they can go they go and it will be cheaper and what you want. Then if the family wants to do a brunch thing to celebrate do that. You are not going to do a cheap wedding in NY....not for that many people! JMO
PoppedInASnap
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Posted by COwens424
why can't you just have an 09 wedding in NY?
Oh boyyyy here goes... lolol
a wedding in NY would mean all of fh's family...
his mother is one of 6, his father is one of 6
All his aunts/uncles have 3 children MINIMUM (four of them have 5) All those children have their own children now as well...
His father has 42 cousins (including spouse not children) his mother about the same
On his side alone, IMMEDIATE family (as considered by them) would be 187(we made a list one day). Thats not including my side...which...if i invited all my cousins, would be way over the 250 mark....
Were renovating his moms house and they want us to buy it off of them, which means the money we have saved would be put to the wedding instead...
xBrunette
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Re: change my dream wedding to please everyone else?
honestly... it's up to you.. i would still get married in disney if that's what you want to do... what did FH have to say about this?
and honestly.. what i would do is get married there with who ever wants to come... then just rent a VFW hall or something like that... and have a party there for everyone else... either have it catered or you cook... that's what i would do...
NO MATTER WHAT you do you can NEVER please everyone... so what's the point of trying... that's my new attitude for 2008, cuz obviously as much as i try to please everyone it just doesn't work.....
PoppedInASnap
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Posted by little34
Posted by UKsunshine
hmmmm this is hard......I used to want a Disney wedding too but then I decided NY would be most convenient for all plus I wanted a much bigger wedding than 40 ppl.......but $78,000!?!?!?!?!!? for 330ppl!!!!
Why don't you do a NY wedding w/ abt 200 ppl for a lot less!!!!!! Maybe like $35,000-$40,000????
Hope this is a little helpful
but could you even do a NY wedding with only 200 pp?? It seems like if you do have it here the family will be telling who to invite and then you have the issue of the guest list...I think your best option is to do it in Disney. If they can go they go and it will be cheaper and what you want. Then if the family wants to do a brunch thing to celebrate do that. You are not going to do a cheap wedding in NY....not for that many people! JMO
Exactly my point.... See, if we do a wedding in NY we HAVE to invite the 'immediate' family. And like he and I both said, If were going to do a wedding in NY, were not going to do something cheap and dumb, its goingto be spectacular...but... there goes a house....
little34
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DISNEY!!!!
xBrunette
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Posted by little34
DISNEY!!!!
yea definitely!!!! i would save up for the house too! you have to live with the debt that comes with the big a$$ wedding, not your family!
AugustBridein09
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if its house vs. wedding....I say go for the HOUSE
meli722
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i say ...do what you and FH WANT!!! not what the FAMILY wants!!!
iam having a problem too, i want NO kids at my wedding besides those in the BP, and they will only be my daughter and FH's niece (2 flowegirls)...im already hearing peoples mouths about their 7 year old coming...or their 10 year old coming etc etc etc...i really dont care to be honest, if it was me i would find a babysitter for my daughter and respect peoples wishes of no children at THEIR wedding, not go and complain!!!! lol sorry i had to vent there...but yeah do what YOU want, its your wedding, not your FAMILY'S.
edited: read the whole thing right now, i say go with disney!!!!
SparklingBride10
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IMO I'd say go for the House.
LnF0405
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I will say DIsney... I have a lot of family and FH as well we decide to do a small wedding (50 guests) because we dont have the money to invite everyone a lot of people are talking but know one had say 'look some money for the weddding' except for my mom and she said do what you want with that money. Dont let people change your plan because when you need those people to make a down payment or to pay for your loan they are not going to give you the money for it
longislandlibrarian
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If it's you and FH's DREAM wedding.. that's what it should be!!!!
Alexandra1028
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I would do what makes you and FH happy!
Alexandra1028
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Posted by UKsunshine
if its house vs. wedding....I say go for the HOUSE
