vent...

long story, i'll try to shorten as much as possible.

FH and I have been talking about moving for quite sometime, actually since we met. He works for a paint company as an assistant manager, and I work as a bookkeeper for an accounting firm, and I'm kinda hating it and itching for a career change.

Fh said with his job he can transfer and try to get a higher position. He interviewed for 3 places out of state (yes, you have to re-interview), he didn't get any of them (one of them we were actually happy he didn't get once we looked into the area). he figured by taking the management training course it would up his chances. he told me the DM said that they try to look for people with knowledge in the area, and that could be a very good reason FH wasn't at the top of the list for another location.

Well, as he expected, his manager resigned, and he inquired about it, since he would not have to re-interview and it's guaranteed for him. but they want a 2-3 year commitment, and i said to him that i'd rather not do that, but if it meant a significant pay change for him, i'd bite my tongue. well, it doesn't increase as much as we hoped. and his DM said he was going to help him relocate, which was nice of him.

I'm just tired of waiting. And everyone's telling me I'm crazy to let this happen before the wedding. I wish people would mind there own business, like I don't have that figured out already? if FH had to transfer now, fine, I'll move back with my parents until the wedding, our apt. complex requires 60 days notice to terminate a lease with a job transfer anyway. I'd be so busy with this wedding planning that i wont really notice the distance so much. We're not talking crazy far, Ohio is a stretch, but honestly, I love it there and I would really love it if he could get transferred near his brother. We could live off one salary, or (because i'd go nuts) get a part time job for grocery money.

I just want a house. I don't want to live in my apartment anymore. School is almost here and all the students that attend stony brook get apartments in our complex. now that i have 4 cats (which is my own fault, i know) it's getting cramped. to get a 2 bedroom apartment is basically the same as a mortgage payment on a house NOT on long island, so why stay?

ugh. im tired of waiting for life.

First of all, congrats to your FH for getting that better job ... if it's in Ohio, even if the salary isn't that much higher, it really is good because of the cost of living there.

I don't think a 2-3 year commitment to that company is bad ... it's not ideal with the wedding coming up, but it's not so terrible either. And it'll put him in a good position to get an even better job in a few years.

if you are ok with it, and he is ok with it, i see nothing wrong with it

well honestly you have your whole life to move and get a house. and honestly a house can SUCK. I've paid out 10k easily in 6 months on repairs.


and moving before a wedding can be really stressful.

but my advice is go with your gut. if its possibly and really important to you, then go for it. just dont take too much on at once.

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Posted by lori7570

Don't listen to anyone else - Sug could have gotten a good job in GA a few years back, but I was to much of a wuss to move. I regret it now. Even if it is awful 2-3 years flies by. It sounds like this is something you want to do - I would go for it. You have some time before the wedding and don't neccessarily need to be in NY at this point

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I need to be here for the planning still, and the next 3 months I'm sure would FLY.

I want to leave my job - I HATE it. It's a mess here, unorganized, and I'm not treated as good as I was in the beginning.....they might as well chain me to the wall behind me desk. I'd rather not look for a job here, because they'd expect me to stay, and I don't want to. I'd rather wait until after the wedding to look for a new job. Would you hire me if I said to you I needed 3 weeks off for my wedding? Probably not. I mean, the chances of getting that are very very slim, most companies pick someone whose willing to start right away with no other commitments.

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Posted by allornil

well honestly you have your whole life to move and get a house. and honestly a house can SUCK. I've paid out 10k easily in 6 months on repairs.


and moving before a wedding can be really stressful.

but my advice is go with your gut. if its possibly and really important to you, then go for it. just dont take too much on at once.

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Well, I don't plan on moving, but if FH had to for this job, I'd live separate until the wedding.

Wait it out. Honestly. I just moved to Florida from Ohio (FH is from NY) and I HATE it! Seriously, it's not as easy as you think to pick up and move.

That being said, it could also be really positive move too.

I also understand what you mean about feel antsy to get out the apartment. I am going through the same thing!!!!

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Posted by elp6421

Wait it out. Honestly. I just moved to Florida from Ohio (FH is from NY) and I HATE it! Seriously, it's not as easy as you think to pick up and move.

That being said, it could also be really positive move too.

I also understand what you mean about feel antsy to get out the apartment. I am going through the same thing!!!!

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Well in my case, its not really a 'pick up and move', we cannot exit a lease that soon. we still have to pay 2 months rent here, so it'd be kinda gradual. and i'd let FH handle that part while I finish the odds and ends of the wedding planning.

I'm just really anxious to get out of NY, the expenses are killing us.