Vent fil and Bm ruined tasting

So listen to this ish! My fmil has been completely uncooperative through this entire process. Every time I tried to involve her and my ffil it blew up in my face. First it was going dress shopping she was coming then she wasn't then she was but she was upset others were too and she wasn't given enough notice. Then it was my confirmation, which I made because we're getting married in a Catholic Church. She was coming then she wasn't because she didn't get a formal invite from me. I invite her and my mother decided that since she was coming she'd cook and do something after all because my future in-laws were coming but fmil decided last minute that she had 'too much to do to come back for food', which is something she's done numerous times to my parents (backed out of the invite before) she REFUSES TO HELP WITH ANY PART OF THE WEDDING because supposedly they're strapped but threw a catered affair for FH's nephew. And have 'gone away' on numerous weekend trips AND remodeled their deck.

So when the tasting came up it was originally for 6 people. But since the sets of parents weren't getting along fh and I decided to make it my mother his mother and the best man and maid of honor so it could be drama free and enjoyable. Well my mother had major dental surgery and can't eat so my father was going to go. Fmil refused to go without her husband. Because fh and I had already made a decision about who was invited and who wasn't and yet again she was being difficult we said were just going to go by ourselves. We ended up bringing my father, sister, brother, and friend of the groom to try and salvage the night and enjoy ourselves. WELL THAT DIDNT WORK!

Our banquet manager knows fh parents from church and earlier in the week fmil called and asked that the reservation was only for two. Our Bm told her it was for six AND THEN CALLED FMIL LAST NIGHT TO TELL HER WHO WAS THERE!!!!!!!! Wait it gets better!

Right before we were to try our cake our Bm asked to speak to fh. The b**** pulled him away from the table and chastised him for not bringing his parents! I walked away from the table and found him standing in the hallway talking to this woman! I lost it!!!! WE signed the contract!!! WE are the ones paying you!!!! WE are the bride and groom!!! Who do you think you are?!?

She kept saying his mother is her friend. I told her it was a family matter and she should stay out of it!! I also said that no matter how close you think you are you're not even invited! Seriously ruined the evening for fh who was upset to begin with. I can't believe some people and they're nosy ways!!!! Stay out of it and do your job where's your professionalism?!?!? B****!!!!!

End rant.

Vent fil and Bm ruined tasting - Long Island Weddings

where are you getting married? this is crazy!

.

Vent fil and Bm ruined tasting

I don't want to name names bc I'm working with the gm who has been very professional. I'm livid. And when I went over to tell her to stay out of it, she wouldn't stop, fh had to break it up. I've dealt with weddings and fh works with events at a prestigious hotel and I've never seen such an outright showing of a complete lack of professionalism.

Re: Vent fil and Bm ruined tasting

You did the right thing telling the BM off. I hope you contacted the GM today and told him what happened. This is very unprofessionally and a breach of your privacy.

Vent fil and Bm ruined tasting

I sat down with him last night immediately after it happened

Vent fil and Bm ruined tasting - Long Island Weddings

That's insane! That is very unprofessional of the BM. She should be ashamed of herself and spoken to by the general manager.

Vent fil and Bm ruined tasting - Long Island Weddings

Wow I am SOO Sorry this happened. I would speak with the owner or someone higher on the chain to get her taken care of. This is SOOOO unprofessional and RUDE!!!

Sorry your FMIL is causing drama. I know that way too well...

Vent fil and Bm ruined tasting

Yanno the worst part was that it upset my fh. It's been difficult to deal with them to begin with and I've tried to make it an enjoyable process anyway but I feel like it just ruined what should have been a fun part of this process. I'm prepared for drama because of these boards and being a woman I realize that anytime you involve this many people and emotions dramas gonna happen but he's not. He's so frustrated with the way everything turns into an issue

Vent fil and Bm ruined tasting - Long Island Weddings

WHY do FIL's always do s*it like this?!! I'm so sorry you're dealing with this.

Re: Vent fil and Bm ruined tasting

The BM was total out of line and unprofessional. It doesn't matter if she is your future in-laws friend. She is being paid to do a job. Unbelievable!!!

Vent fil and Bm ruined tasting - Long Island Weddings

I'm so sorry this happened to you. I also have an insane FMIL, so I can sympathize.

That BM sounds like a piece of work. I would outright refuse to work with her going forward. We had a super nasty BM when we booked (she's no longer there) and when we discovered some, discrepancies in things she told us, we asked to be switched and it's been smooth sailing ever since-our new BM is fabulous.

What an unprofessional dingbat!

Re: Vent fil and Bm ruined tasting

---

Posted by vppjzv

Wow. That's so unprofessional. I'd be flipping out.

Sorry you didn't have a good time :( love how dramatic weddings become...

---

This

Vent fil and Bm ruined tasting

Thanks guys, this made me so livid. I really needed to vent.

Vent fil and Bm ruined tasting

That really is ridiculous. When you talked to the general manager what did they say about it. I think if I was in this situation I would want something done to make up for the stress/irritation that she put you guys through.

Vent fil and Bm ruined tasting - Long Island Weddings

Yes so sorry this is happening to you.. I thought I had it back with things.. But glad you spoke up and didn't let her walk all over you. I would too ask for a new BM or someone different to work with. Obviously there is a conflict of interest and she is letting her opinions get in the way of a wedding she has no right being a part of. Good luck with everything!

Vent fil and Bm ruined tasting

The gm has been great and I documented what happened with a letter to him. He said he'll take care of us. I reiterated that I want her to have no access to our wedding our information. She wasn't even invited

Vent fil and Bm ruined tasting - Long Island Weddings

I would go right to management and I would never accept to have that woman as my BM after that. I'm livid just reading this!!

on a side note my FMIL does the same thing, she's demanding that we have her families children at our wedding (sorry WE decided a year ago no kids) and she backed out of our tasting like 2 hours before because she drank too much the night before. way to be an adult and cherish the important moments in life! SMH