I am SOOOOOOOOO ANGRY I am going to scream!!!!!!!!
Okay, I had to get that off my chest.
I swear to ... if your son and his FW are struggling with cutting people from their guest list, and the lovely bride emails you and asks if you have to cut people, is there anyone you can cut? WOULD YOU RESPOND 'UH-OH.... I WAS GOING TO ADD MORE PEOPLE ACTUALLY'
WOULD YOU DO THAT WHEN YOU KNOW HOW STRESSED OUT THEY ARE OVER THIS???
AHHHHHHHHHHHHH!
Note: No, they're not contributing to the wedding, and no, these people she wants to add are NOT relatives!
UPDATE IS DOWN BELOW - I'm really bad at this lol
MikesBride2B
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Re: VENT!!!! (fmil)
Tell her there is no room for more people and if she can't cut people herself you will just randomly take people off the list until its at a more acceptable number...so if she wants control over it she better do it herself by x date.
Soon2bShea
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Re: VENT!!!! (fmil)
Posted by MikesBride2B
Tell her there is no room for more people and if she can't cut people herself you will just randomly take people off the list until its at a more acceptable number...so if she wants control over it she better do it herself by x date.
ITA....also...the one who pays has the say
Kiki1103
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Re: VENT!!!! (fmil)
Ugh thats ridiculous. Tell her she has a limit of X number of people and she has to get it down to that (unless of course she wants to start contributing to wedding costs)
Clover23
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Re: VENT!!!! (fmil)
I finally just spoke with FH and he agreed that was not an appropriate response by FMIL... at least he's on my side!!! He said he'll 'take care of it' with her...
thanks girls - i knew you'd understand!
WeddingGem
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Re: VENT!!!! (fmil)
First of all breathe!!
I agree with what´s being said. You can explain to her (even if she already knows it) that for financial reasons you are cutting down your guest list. And even though you would love to have everyone there it simply isn´t doable right now. Explain that each person has to cut xx amount of people off the list.
If she insists stress again that you simply can´t afford it but that if she really wants them there then she needs to contribute xx per person to take into account the cost of the RH + favor + invite, etc.
luvly73
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Re: VENT!!!! (fmil)
I think i;m going to be dealing with this also. The only difference is that they are paying for all the extra ppl they wanna add but sometimes its not about the money. This is my wedding not a show for people I don't know. It ***** though because if they are paying there is only so much I can say about it
Jna2010
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Re: VENT!!!! (fmil)
sorry but her response is kinda funny, like shes trying to see if she could get away with it haha
just be like listen f-m-i-l, I'm hacking off the list so which of your guests will be the first to go lol
no seriously though just totally ignore her response, kindly tell her that youre trying to cut down the list and the expenses have been adding up and need to know which people she is least closest with, dont give a hypothetical, tell her that youre doing it
hope it works out
His future Mrs
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Re: VENT!!!! (fmil)
tell her the room is at maximum capacity
Clover23
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Re: VENT!!!! (fmil)
Posted by His future Mrs
tell her the room is at maximum capacity
Actually, that's the reason we have to cut people, more so than finances. Even if we switch RH's, we're over the max. Going to a bigger RH would mean more $, which we can't do either. And certainly not to appease her ridiculous add on's. I asked you to CUT people, not ADD people! I swear she is not capable of listening! It's like she didn't even hear the conversation I had with her last night about how stressed we are over the guest list and RH issues! Does she think it's ok because we live in her house in an apartment that she could rent for more $$ than she charges us? Does that make it ok to be ridiculous?
Thanks all for your input and everything - I've definitely calmed down over the last couple of hours
sassie_320
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Re: VENT!!!! (fmil)
i would tell her the truth...
some people are sooo inconsiderate!!!!
JAAMS
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Re: VENT!!!! (fmil)
Clover23
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Re: VENT!!!! (fmil) - UPDATED***
UPDATED:
Soooo I tried to sneak out the door this morning with out her hearing me. No luck. I was almost at the front door and she swung open her door (we have a shared front entrance to the house - our apt. door is at the top of the stairs, her door is at the bottom)
FMIL: So did you get my email last night?
Me: Yes.
FMIL: So I wanted to add these people....
Me: Well, we really have to cut people...
FMIL: Well here's the thing (whips out the list from her pajamas, somehow). This person and this person may not come. And these people, well you never know. So if those people don't come, and I add the other people, it will all even out anyway!
Me: Again, we have to cut people. I cut my entire department at work, my mom cut family, and FH cut a couple of people.
FMIL: Well... you know, FH shouldn't really invite people from work - I mean you should really think how important that is to you.
Me: Maybe you should talk about this with FH. I have to get to work.
Ummmm.... MIGHT not come, so it will EVEN OUT? Sorry lady, MIGHT not come doesn't mean jack shtt when you are having capacity issues! What if they come? Can they sit on your head?
little j
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Re: VENT!!!! (fmil) - UPDATED***
why are these guests soo important? that is crazy. good luck
Its2Snappy
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Re: VENT!!!! (fmil) - UPDATED***
Let FH sort it out with her. You don't need any more headaches.
you really need to have your fh put her in her place!!!
futuremrsjc2010
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Re: VENT!!!! (fmil) - UPDATED***
I hope the guest she wants to invite are not her friends, is she willing to pay for these ppl??? People really dont understand that the more ppl they invite means more $$$$$$$$$$$$ . ITA I would let FH handle this b/c I wouldnt want to deal with the extra stress...
Soon2bShea
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Re: VENT!!!! (fmil) - UPDATED***
'might not come??' everyone loves weddings and its surprising how many people you never see respond that they will come !
...and btw...by the time you find out if the people who might not come, actually plan on coming or not, it might be too late for FMIL to invite her new additions
