vent (kind of long)- bm dresses

Original post by Mrs. V 2008

Oct 05, 2007 03:07 PM

Sometimes I can't take picking out a bm dress..now all of my bm's are diferent sizes and honestly they have given me no problem what so ever ...they'll pretty much wear anything in any color and i've been trying to find a style that looks right on all of them..its my moh thats making the biggest deal..she won't compromise for anything..The dress has to have a certain neckline, no sash, not too fitted, she hates half of the colors i'm picking out and hates tea length dresses..its irritating because I've been pretty fair trying to accomodate her..but she won't bend at all..its to the point that my mother is telling me that i have to get a DIFFERENT dress for her in a different color, mind you i want all my bm's in the same dress. I love sashes..she won't do it..and honestly, i think because she feels self conscious is everything (she is a little heavy and i mean alittle!!! she's a little big boned thats all..she thinks shes overweight and she totally isn't) Do you think im wrong here? or should she compromise more with me too? everytime i complain that i want all of the dresses to match..i hear that i am being a 'bridezilla'..im sick of it...just needed to vent and want an honest opinion..thanks for listening girls!

mrspalomino148 Posted: Oct 05, 2007 03:22 PM

Re: vent (kind of long)- bm dresses

I really agree with you, and I don't think your being 'bridezilla'

You've been more than accomodating, and she isn't the only one who needs to wear the dress. Maybe just talk to her about it, and go from there, because its not fair that you would have to change what YOU want because she doesn't like sashes etc.

Mrs. V 2008 Posted: Oct 05, 2007 03:22 PM

Re: vent (kind of long)- bm dresses

Posted by snwb08

Posted by yelley77

I don't understand people, sometimes. If I was honored enough to be asked to be in a BP I would not open my mouth about ANYTHING!!!!

i agree. these posts about BMs make me so glad i'm not doing a traditional bridal party. I told my sister (MOH) she can wear whatever she wants and people think I'm crazy

thing is its not my bridal party at all! they're all really easy and don't care! its the moh

Mrs. V 2008 Posted: Oct 05, 2007 03:23 PM

Re: vent (kind of long)- bm dresses

Posted by cbcf

Posted by Bride 2 Be

Posted by yelley77

It's your wedding and you shouldn't be the one making the sacrifices. I would pick like three dresses and tell her to pick from those (this way she feels like she is choosing the dress) and then tell the rest of the BM's that is the dress. Ask her of all her restrictions, which is most important to her? find a dress that accomadtes her in that area and then get a dress AND color you like. It's your wedding. You will regret letting her tell you what dresses to pick. Also, if you like the sash, go for it... It is your wedding.

I don't understand people, sometimes. If I was honored enough to be asked to be in a BP I would not open my mouth about ANYTHING!!!!

i know! its my sister too! she keeps threatening me that she'll drop out if she doesn't like the dress..is that ridiculous or what?

oh no i cant believe its your sister. but i already told my sisters because htey are the ones i can be most honest with...that i want them all in the same dress, color, length and style. They agreed just because we kinda have the same style. but i think my sisters would be the easiest to tell NO to because htey are my family. Now if it was my cousin or best friend I know it would be a little bit harder...I am sorry I hope it all works out kristen

thanks catie! i appreciate it..i feel better..they were all making me feel like i was being the 'bad one'

kkss1419 Posted: Oct 05, 2007 03:24 PM

Re: vent (kind of long)- bm dresses

I had calling me bridezilla for wanting all of my BP in the same dress as well. I have a very diverse group and was having issues finding something that would work on all. I don't think you are wrong in this. Your MOH should be willing to work with you. I can understand her asking that you consider what she wants, but she shouldn't be dictating such things as color and such. Maybe sit down and talk to her about what you want and explain nicely that you understand how she feels, but it is your wedding. At her wedding she can wear whatever she likes. JMO.

Mrs. V 2008 Posted: Oct 05, 2007 03:26 PM

Re: vent (kind of long)- bm dresses

Posted by kkss1419

I had calling me bridezilla for wanting all of my BP in the same dress as well. I have a very diverse group and was having issues finding something that would work on all. I don't think you are wrong in this. Your MOH should be willing to work with you. I can understand her asking that you consider what she wants, but she shouldn't be dictating such things as color and such. Maybe sit down and talk to her about what you want and explain nicely that you understand how she feels, but it is your wedding. At her wedding she can wear whatever she likes. JMO.

thanks! ill try that..and i feel the same way..she likes teal dresses..and if she wants that for her wedding..i would never argue!

yelley77 Posted: Oct 05, 2007 03:28 PM

Re: vent (kind of long)- bm dresses

Posted by Bride 2 Be

Posted by yelley77

It's your wedding and you shouldn't be the one making the sacrifices. I would pick like three dresses and tell her to pick from those (this way she feels like she is choosing the dress) and then tell the rest of the BM's that is the dress. Ask her of all her restrictions, which is most important to her? find a dress that accomadtes her in that area and then get a dress AND color you like. It's your wedding. You will regret letting her tell you what dresses to pick. Also, if you like the sash, go for it... It is your wedding.

I don't understand people, sometimes. If I was honored enough to be asked to be in a BP I would not open my mouth about ANYTHING!!!!

i know! its my sister too! she keeps threatening me that she'll drop out if she doesn't like the dress..is that ridiculous or what?

It is so ridiculous and it is b/c she is your sister that she is giving SUCH a hard time, b/c she knows you aren't going to say, 'fine, don't be in it'

minibride08 Posted: Oct 05, 2007 03:29 PM

Re: vent (kind of long)- bm dresses

All of my girls are wearing a different Belosie dress (6 girls) but very similar. They are in my album. All girls vary in size ... so this worked out great! And, my MOH dress is very similar, but no straps and has a sash...All same color

Mrs. V 2008 Posted: Oct 05, 2007 03:35 PM

Re: vent (kind of long)- bm dresses

Posted by minibride08

All of my girls are wearing a different Belosie dress (6 girls) but very similar. They are in my album. All girls vary in size ... so this worked out great! And, my MOH dress is very similar, but no straps and has a sash...All same color

very pretty choices!

Mizzdimple Posted: Oct 05, 2007 03:59 PM

Re: vent (kind of long)- bm dresses

ur not a bridezilla......u know what pick out the BM's dress., and then give her the designer, fabric and color and tell her to go pick somethign on her own!

Mrs. V 2008 Posted: Oct 05, 2007 04:05 PM

Re: vent (kind of long)- bm dresses

Posted by Mizzdimple

ur not a bridezilla......u know what pick out the BM's dress., and then give her the designer, fabric and color and tell her to go pick somethign on her own!

thanks lisa!! thats probably what ill have to do!

MrsD71208 Posted: Oct 05, 2007 04:06 PM

Re: vent (kind of long)- bm dresses

Posted by Bride 2 Be

Sometimes I can't take picking out a bm dress..now all of my bm's are diferent sizes and honestly they have given me no problem what so ever ...they'll pretty much wear anything in any color and i've been trying to find a style that looks right on all of them..its my moh thats making the biggest deal..she won't compromise for anything..The dress has to have a certain neckline, no sash, not too fitted, she hates half of the colors i'm picking out and hates tea length dresses..its irritating because I've been pretty fair trying to accomodate her..but she won't bend at all..its to the point that my mother is telling me that i have to get a DIFFERENT dress for her in a different color, mind you i want all my bm's in the same dress. I love sashes..she won't do it..and honestly, i think because she feels self conscious is everything (she is a little heavy and i mean alittle!!! she's a little big boned thats all..she thinks shes overweight and she totally isn't) Do you think im wrong here? or should she compromise more with me too? everytime i complain that i want all of the dresses to match..i hear that i am being a 'bridezilla'..im sick of it...just needed to vent and want an honest opinion..thanks for listening girls!

I think you need to remember it's your wedding...you pick the dress. I'd pick a dress and tell them this is the dress...go get sized and that's it. I'm bring one of my BM's to try them on and I am choosing one then...I'll let the rest of my BP know what they have to buy and that's it.

Princess Cut Bride Posted: Oct 05, 2007 06:08 PM

Re: vent (kind of long)- bm dresses

Kristin....you are NOT being a bridezilla....your moh is being very uncooperative! She is forgetting that it is YOUR wedding. If you want a dress with a sash why would you not pick that?!?!?! You can not please everyone...just remember it's your day and you should pick whatever dress you want as long as it flatters everyone's body type.

Good luck...try not to stress.

Teamhurldon Posted: Oct 05, 2007 06:52 PM

Re: vent (kind of long)- bm dresses

you can pick what you want.....

I Love my bear Posted: Oct 05, 2007 08:11 PM

Re: vent (kind of long)- bm dresses

I'm surprised she doesn't want a sash! They can be really flattering especially if you're self-conscious. Anyway my MOH threw me a curveball too. My bm's have been so easy but my MOH told me she doesn't want strapless flat out sooo I had the dresses all picked out and now I'm thrown into complete confusion b/c I have to re-think my whole scheme. Anyway I thought she would be the most easy-going one!! She doesn't like light colors...or long dresses...Boy I was wrong!

bluegreen08 Posted: Oct 05, 2007 10:28 PM

Re: vent (kind of long)- bm dresses

It's your wedding, not hers. Luckily she's the MOH so it's normal for her to wear a diff dress (although my MOH is wearing the same dress w/ diff flowers)

try to accommodate her but in the end it's your call

Mrs. V 2008 Posted: Oct 06, 2007 02:17 PM

Re: vent (kind of long)- bm dresses

thanks for the support and all of the advice girls! i really appreciate it!!!

novia26 Posted: Oct 06, 2007 02:23 PM

Re: vent (kind of long)- bm dresses

Honestly...I'm picking the bridesmaid dresses, its not even up for debate...I am taking into consideration bodytypes and such...but honestly the bm dresses do affect the overall look of the wedding and thats something that should be entirely up to you...not her. If I were you, I'd pick the dress for the other girls, once she sees them in the dress maybe she'll come around or I'd tell the other bridesmaids to speak to her...maybe if they do it, it won't look like your being a 'bridezilla' which I don't think you are being anyway. If she still wants to have a different dress, meet her half way...tell her she can pick a dress as long as you approve of the style and color....good luck.

zoe282 Posted: Oct 07, 2007 02:54 PM

Re: vent (kind of long)- bm dresses

I agree, i think the term Bridezilla is being used way too frequently. Everyone will have their own turn to plan their own wedding someday so they should let you plans yours how you want it. My sister is my MOH and i am choosing pink for my BM colors....She hates pink! and keeps suggesting other things.....In reality I appreciate the fact that she is comfortable enough to tell me how she really feels...but I tell her that as much as I appreciate her suggestions...they are VETOED! lol

If she is your sister tell her to respect your decision. I think if you go with an A line dress you'll be fine....I did Jim Hjelm 5678 and i think it will look great on heavier people...it has a dropped waist with rouching at the top and that hides alot!

Stink to your guns!!!

Cheryl28 Posted: Oct 07, 2007 02:58 PM

Re: vent (kind of long)- bm dresses

Posted by Bride 2 Be

Posted by yelley77

It's your wedding and you shouldn't be the one making the sacrifices. I would pick like three dresses and tell her to pick from those (this way she feels like she is choosing the dress) and then tell the rest of the BM's that is the dress. Ask her of all her restrictions, which is most important to her? find a dress that accomadtes her in that area and then get a dress AND color you like. It's your wedding. You will regret letting her tell you what dresses to pick. Also, if you like the sash, go for it... It is your wedding.

I don't understand people, sometimes. If I was honored enough to be asked to be in a BP I would not open my mouth about ANYTHING!!!!

i know! its my sister too! she keeps threatening me that she'll drop out if she doesn't like the dress..is that ridiculous or what?

My sisters made me so upset, that I took my BF and picked out 3 or 4 dresses, then went back with all of them and picked one from those. I didn't care anymore.