Vent-Selfish FSIL!

UGH-FH's Sister is SO selfish.

FH & Her DO NOT get a long-when they do talk-they end up having blow out arguements.

So we originally had our date set at 11/12/11. But after some venue changes & other plans we moved it up to 4/22/11. This was discussed since LAST November! Over new years; FH finds out that his sister is getting married this year too-and has set her date as 4/22/11!!! She's only been with the guy maybe 2 years and it's her second marriage. FH laughed it off; thinking that she's always trying to compete with him.

She never even told her parents; FH; or their sister. Instead she posted it on Facebook & started inviting friends from their childhood etc. (mind you people that weren't even on our list; but i guess she figured we were going to invite them.

Just out of kindness i asked FH if he wanted to change our date (we hadn't printed invites) but he said NO; that we had been together for 7 years; engaged for 2; everyone knew we were planning our wedding for this year. And knew we had moved it up to April. That she was being selfish by not reaching out to him to see if the dates would conflict.

Long story short-FH's other sister; isn't even going to her wedding. Never planned on going even if it were a different day they don't get a long either. Fh gets a call from his father today saying he doesn't know if he can come to OUR wedding; because he doesn't want it to seem like he's choosing sides. FFIL NEVER got invited to the other daughters wedding. He's only heard of it by word of mouth. Apparently the daughter was gonna tell him in person when he went to visit her kids next month. (So an invitiation or basically first offical knowledge of your own childs wedding 2 months prior). Which FH says his father wasn't even going to her wedding anyway; because he doesn't agree with it and after the way she rushed into her 1st marriage and is doing the same thing again. basically she's marrying a low life.

I'm so MAD. Now FH is upset that his OWN father is saying he might not go to his son's wedding; so he doesn't hurt the selfish sisters feelings.

But i said if FFL wasn't gonig to the wedding regardless of what date it was (and still technically hasn't been invited) then what difference does it make if it's now on the same day????

What kind of sister knows her brother is getting married either doesn't even check to see what the date is or doesn't care and just makes her plans to compete?

Sorry this is so long-i just can't believe her! I can see why FH doesn't even talk to her-it's very sad that she coudln't just put their differences aside; be happy for her brother and let him have his day.

OMG! I thought MY FSIL was bad!

We had to postpone our wedding and she planned her wedding for one of the dates we wanted...
but THIS TAKES THE CAKE


OMG She's totally insane. Has she booked anything? What does the rest of the family say about it? I think FFIL and the rest of the family really should step up and say something. I don't understand why they are standing by and accepting this. SOMEONE needs to tell her she can't do this. It's ridiculous!

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Posted by HSsweethearts

OMG! I thought MY FSIL was bad!

We had to postpone our wedding and she planned her wedding for one of the dates we wanted...
but THIS TAKES THE CAKE


OMG She's totally insane. Has she booked anything? What does the rest of the family say about it? I think FFIL and the rest of the family really should step up and say something. I don't understand why they are standing by and accepting this. SOMEONE needs to tell her she can't do this. It's ridiculous!

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She's CRAZY!!

No one else from FH's side of the family is going to her wedding! They don't even know about it!! At least not 'officailly' everything has been overheard-news passed from one sourse to another. Instead of inviting her 45 year old sister; she e-mailed her 14 year old nephew to invite him! How is the 14 year old gonna get to the wedding if his mother doesn't know about it? The sister found out about it through her SON!!

I'm telling you she set her date very fast-everyone was already going to ours and from what FH says; weren't even planning on going to hers ANYWAY.

They're all excited to finally see us get married; her's (i'm sorry to say) just seems like a joke!

FH doesn't talk to her; so we don't know what she's got planned yet; and if it will even actually happen. He sister doesn't even know the plans because they haven't talked in a while either!

She's always been a selfish child (she's like 40 now) and FFIL always gives in to her.

I just pray that this one time FFIL finally sees just how messed up he is; and goes to his one son's first (only) wedding!

I know he's heartbroken; but he just keeps saying it is what it is. That he's still getting married with our without his father. Just sucks that his dad is gonna sit home and do what watch TV; instead of going to his sons wedding?

When do your invites go out? You should get them out ASAP!!!! Or at least send an email STD or something.

Holy crap. I am just amazed at this person. She seriously needs professional help. I am NOT kidding.

The thing is, EVERYONE knows you and FH have been together for a long time and are struggling for this wedding, so I'm sure they are going to come to your wedding and blow off hers. let her have her table scraps

ETA: I think FFIL will come around

are either of you booked for that date yet? Do you think she is doing it just to be a beotch and get you all steaming mad and ruin your engagement?

I would knock my brother out if him and his fiance did that to me... im sorry but if you are both engaged at the same time, wouldnt it make sense to ask the other when you were getting married, reguardless of how good or bad your relationship is??? im so sorry you are going through this...

I was stuffing the invites last night!! Plan on getting them out this weekend!

I also told FH that i believe his father will come around. I just coudln't imagine him missing his son's wedding to not make his selfish daughter who hasn't even told her own father she was getting married upset!

wow what a crazy psycho b*tch!!! i can't believe she would pull something off like that!

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Posted by Notwedyet08

I was stuffing the invites last night!! Plan on getting them out this weekend!

I also told FH that i believe his father will come around. I just coudln't imagine him missing his son's wedding to not make his selfish daughter who hasn't even told her own father she was getting married upset!

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Yeah, I think it's clear she's being insane. Also, I'm assuming he went to her first wedding, so you can use that angle

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Posted by HSsweethearts

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Posted by Notwedyet08

I was stuffing the invites last night!! Plan on getting them out this weekend!

I also told FH that i believe his father will come around. I just coudln't imagine him missing his son's wedding to not make his selfish daughter who hasn't even told her own father she was getting married upset!

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Yeah, I think it's clear she's being insane. Also, I'm assuming he went to her first wedding, so you can use that angle

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Nope he didn't even go to her first wedding! Although i think he may have helped her pay for some of it!

This is some crazy shlt!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I mean whoa, I was pissed that one of our groomsmen decided to plan a wedding 2 weeks before ours in another state after we already had our date set for a couple months (FH is in the wedding).

I really do believe FFIL will come around. I think getting your invites out ASAP is key and it seems you guests kind of know the deal with FSIL and would def come to your 'real' wedding over hers.

I just don't get how she doesn't feel like an idiot!!!! How she does't see that people would be like 'W T F is wrong w/ you?' Out of all the dates she had to pick that one!! Why not the day before or even after?!?!!

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Posted by fdnybride163

are either of you booked for that date yet? Do you think she is doing it just to be a beotch and get you all steaming mad and ruin your engagement?

I would knock my brother out if him and his fiance did that to me... im sorry but if you are both engaged at the same time, wouldnt it make sense to ask the other when you were getting married, reguardless of how good or bad your relationship is??? im so sorry you are going through this...

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I dont' know about her-but we're all booked-deposits paid; various contracts signed. And we have been all set with this date since last fall.

She only told people she was getting married in the winter; a while after we set our date & booked things. The problem is that they don't talk. He'll never pick up the phone to cal her or vice versa. It was news through the grapevine that she was even engaged. She never even called her family to tell them. She just makes me sick.

I feel deep down that FFIL will come around; i can understand as a father he would feel torn. But he says that he wouldn't go to hers no matter what date it was; so that's where i'm just confused. If the whole family got a long there would be no issue-dates would be far apart. She's just selfish. We weren't inviting her to our wedding-so maybe she felt the need to have her own on that day just to cause problems?

wow that's a pretty awful situation .... your FSIL is acting like a ridiculous child ... it's really disgusting.

anyway, i think you and your FH need to speak with your FFIL and explain to him why he should still attend your wedding ... that he shouldn't let your FSIL succeed in taking away from your wedding. Yours was planned first and he already gave a 'verbal' rsvp ... so he should still come to yours.

good luck with this!

I am honestly in such shock reading this!!! I have no words! This is just UNBELIEVABLE and so so wrong

thanks girls!! It's really a terrible situation!!

Hopefully FFIL will come around. We couldn't imagine him not being there!

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Posted by Notwedyet08

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Posted by fdnybride163

are either of you booked for that date yet? Do you think she is doing it just to be a beotch and get you all steaming mad and ruin your engagement?

I would knock my brother out if him and his fiance did that to me... im sorry but if you are both engaged at the same time, wouldnt it make sense to ask the other when you were getting married, reguardless of how good or bad your relationship is??? im so sorry you are going through this...

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I dont' know about her-but we're all booked-deposits paid; various contracts signed. And we have been all set with this date since last fall.

She only told people she was getting married in the winter; a while after we set our date & booked things. The problem is that they don't talk. He'll never pick up the phone to cal her or vice versa. It was news through the grapevine that she was even engaged. She never even called her family to tell them. She just makes me sick.

I feel deep down that FFIL will come around; i can understand as a father he would feel torn. But he says that he wouldn't go to hers no matter what date it was; so that's where i'm just confused. If the whole family got a long there would be no issue-dates would be far apart. She's just selfish. We weren't inviting her to our wedding-so maybe she felt the need to have her own on that day just to cause problems?

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If you were not inviting her to the wedding, i can see why she would do something like that just to spite you guys. Honestly, the only thing that I would be upset about is FFIL not wanting to go to yours, but like you said you hope that he comes around

You should pretend like this doesnt even bother you, make her feel like the fool for being so petty, When people find out that she booked on the same day they are going to look at her like the idiot that she is. It doesnt seem like you have any mutual friends, and if your family and FHs family support you and your situiation they will be there for you.

Be the bigger person and go about things as if she doesnt exsist, enjoy your engagement, and just keep reiterating to anyone who will listen how excited you are to marry the love of your life and how amazing your wedding will be knowing that you will be surround by people who support you

If not, FM me, ill take out her knee caps