Has anyone experienced this? And how do you handle it?
I got engaged in March -every time I talk to this oneperson I work with about what RH’s I looked at, Bridal shops I visited or anything wedding related- she takes over the conversation and tells me what she wants to do when she gets married. At first I was OK with it because I like to hear everyone’s Idea’s but yesterday it bothered me. I came in all excited and told her I picked out my dress and all of a sudden she wants to talk to me about her dress! Ok granted she is getting married this month and she only got engaged last month- but why can’t she just be happy for me? Plus she has been doing this since March when she wasn't engaged. I talk to this person because she always asks- but it always gets turned to her. It’s driving me nuts!!!
FutureJOC
Posted:
Member since
Re: Venting....
did I hear you say that correctly? She only got engaged last month and is getting married next month????
i haven't had this happen directly to me but i have witnessed it happening to other friends of mine that are planning or have planned their weddings and it is really annoying. I know everyone is excited about their own weddings and what they plan to do for their big days but there comes a time when you just need to listen and not be the center of attention.
It sounds like this friend of yours only wants to create siutaions where she can talk about her own wedding - hence always bringing up WR topics with you.
Not entirely sure how to handle it other than keeping your ideas and planning to yourself and choosing not share information with her. She might start to get the hint.
anszusterman
Posted:
Member since
Re: Venting....
It happened to me by a girl that I thought was a friend, but then turned out not to be. Whenever I would call her about something, it always turned to her. Like you, I tried to be understanding in the beginning, but then it just wears on you. You only get to do wedding planning like this once, and she always seemed to suck the helium out of my wedding balloon. Its was easy for me to handle it though- I live in NYC, she lives in Buffalo, so I just stopped answering her phone calls and texts. Since for you its a co-worker, that makes it a little more sticky. Personally, I would turn into a bridezilla- you tried the high road and it didn't work, now try the low road. I don't know if that makes me a bad person for telling you that....but thats my advice!
DaniandKen2010
Posted:
Member since
Re: Venting....
Let her enjoy it until she gets married. If she still continue afterwards I would just tell her you had your wedding and got to talk about it nonstop now its my turn.
FutureJOC
Posted:
Member since
Re: Venting....
Posted by nydk21
Let her enjoy it until she gets married. If she still continue afterwards I would just tell her you had your wedding and got to talk about it nonstop now its my turn.
I agree that she is just doing this because her wedding is coming first and she probably feels you have more time to discuss yours. But if she keeps it up, i fully agree and give you permission to go Bridezilla on her A!
DanielleMF
Posted:
Member since
Re: Venting....
And yes- I did say she got engaged last month and is getting married this month.
This is her 3rd marriage but she never had a real wedding so I always assumed it was for that reason- but at the same time- let me glow for a minute.
I actually caught myself about to do the same thing weekend but I realized right away and stopped myself before hand. A friend and I are getting married a year apart so I ask what she planned/booked but have to tell myself not to comment! I dont want to upset her either.
FutureJOC
Posted:
Member since
Re: Venting....
Posted by DanielleMF
I actually caught myself about to do the same thing weekend but I realized right away and stopped myself before hand. A friend and I are getting married a year apart so I ask what she planned/booked but have to tell myself not to comment! I dont want to upset her either.
I have a similiar siutaion. My FBIL is getting married next May and both FI and I are in the WP. I try not to discuss too much about our wedding plans because I want this to be their time for planning and being excited about their little steps along the way to the alter. After they are married I have an entire year to talk about my wedding plans.
