I dont know if anyone is up and posting but how would this make you feel and would you put up with it??
My mom and brother had a big fight. Basic teenage things nothing all that important just silly things said and stuff like that. But being my mom still isnt in the best of ways, she goes off easily now. So, they fight, and they are here at my house.
She goes to leave and tells me hes staying here tonight. She says she cant deal with him coming home. Hes staying here tonight.
Does anyone else see the wrongness in this? Or is this ok? Shouldnt have I been asked? I mean it is her house and I guess she figures he can stay downstairs where we dont live but she knows that he hates staying down there alone and I usually wind up down there with him..I just feel like I am always being told what is going to happen in my life
Again, im 27, married..I dont want this to effect my marriage.
Kathy116
Posted:
Member since
Re: Venting..anyone out there still??
Absolutely your mother should've asked you!
Have you spoken with her about this? I'm sorry
IrishTracy
Posted:
Member since
Re: Venting..anyone out there still??
That's a hard one especially since you all live in the same house. BUT.......I don't think that you should be expected to keep your brother for the night. Who knows what you & your husband had planned.
nycchic_24
Posted:
Member since
Re: Venting..anyone out there still??
Thats the thing...we dont live in the same house.
We rent an apartment in a house my mom owns..my mom lives 3 blocks away with my sister and brother.
I just think its wrong!
prncssrachel
Posted:
Member since
Re: Venting..anyone out there still??
I really think it's time to draw the line with your family on this. I think it's hard to set boundaries for family, but it's a must.
Julybaby
Posted:
Member since
Re: Venting..anyone out there still??
When your mother calms down, you need to talk to you about this situation. It's not just you that she is affecting, but your husband as well.
Stacey1403
Posted:
Member since
Re: Venting..anyone out there still??
Noreen is there anyway you guys could find another place to rent? It might be something to consider and then you wouldn't have these problems. If not I would definitely talk to her. I know with the state of mind and all your mom has been through it will be really hard. Good luck
kelly4
Posted:
Member since
Re: Venting..anyone out there still??
I would not put up with that! That was out of bounds. I'm sure your mother is a great person who just was pushed passed her limits by your brother. He is not your responsibility and should not have to stay with you.
I know you wrote this last night... how did things work out?
kmcwed
Posted:
Member since
Re: Venting..anyone out there still??
Oh no Noreen. Not more to deal with??
I agree that some boundaries have to be set now. It's one thing if your mom is having a hard time, but you have been more than patient and understanding. There has to be a nice way to tell her how you feel. Although even when I'm writing this, I can imagine how she will react.... You're in such a difficult situation.
I think Stacey has a point. Maybe moving to a different apartment, maybe even several towns away, would be a good option. Just the distance alone would set up a boundary. But on the other hand, that's kind of like running from the problem....
I wish I had good advice for you! I'm not sure what I would do in your situation. You must be SO angry and frustrated by now.
mishandgerard
Posted:
Member since
Re: Venting..anyone out there still??
i do not think that is right. this is between your mom and him. it seems like she is using you to not deal with your brother. i am sorry about this, it puts yo uin the middle and it's not fair by any means.
