THIS is the reason why you should all splurge the extra $30 & order 2 sets of RSVP cards with different dates if you think you're having an A & a B list. People on the B list do not need to KNOW they are on the B list.
I got this email today & its hard not to be offended. I understand where she is coming from but save yourselves the embarrassment of having to write an email like this to someone.
(And yes, they attended our wedding a few weeks ago.) ______________________________ Hello My Dearest Lady Caroline! First - I really hope you do not perceive me as being a tacky friend that you hardly get to see - UGH. I know we are at different phases in our life but that does not mean that I don't think the world of you. I know you've got a new baby, a new hubby, a new neighborhood and a horrid commute - so you've got a lot going on and I understand....I'm also wondering how my summer became so swamped with commitment after commitment. I feel a little disconnected from my friends this summer. Anyway, getting on to what I REALLY want to say - I promise you with all my mushy heart that you are not 2nd tier BUT Todd has a huge F-ing family that hogged up our invite list. So needless to say, please just ignore 'Respond by July 1'when you get our invite and pretend you didn't notice the RSVP date. More importantly, please do not be offended - you're not the only one we had to wait on. I hope you and Rob understand and I hope you two can make our Big Humongous Stress Fest on 9/22 ( just kidding - it's all good - nostress) though I truly understand if you have a ton of stuff going on !! Luv, me
WilliesBride
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WOW
Nina_m74
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That is some good advice, thanks
tricia3381
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gpurple
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wow!!!!!!! thanks
LB and DC
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thank you! this is exactly why FH and i don't have a B list. we invited well over our minimum, and if we don't make it, i would rather cough up the extra $$ than embarass myself like that!!
amytee
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i'm speachless
diva7531
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So true, anothetr reason I am so glad I made my own invites!
Lools
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yikes, she must feel really bad and embarassed about having to write that at least I'd think she would. How bizarre.
tbone66
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Yes, we did order some rsvp's with a later date when we figured out we needed a 'B' list. however, everyone that invited us to their wedding was put on the 'A' list.
Noogiefan
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Wowza!
For me - I'm a pretty emotional type and that would definitely upset me. I probably would've cut her off and when the invite comes in the mail just chuck it into the trash with the rest of the half-assed friendship.
I'm sure this is not the action of a reasonable person - but I tend to react on current emotions as opposed to logic.
I'm really sorry that happened to you babe.
Think of it this way - it's $$ in your pocket, since you won't need to get a gift for them.
Lools
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Posted by tbone66
Yes, we did order some rsvp's with a later date when we figured out we needed a 'B' list. however, everyone that invited us to their wedding was put on the 'A' list.
That's a really good point.
MrsQ-in2007
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I think your friend definitely tried to word the email as nicely as she could, but I can definitely still see how you would be offended - I would too.
carolinebr
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Posted by MrsQ-in2007
I think your friend definitely tried to word the email as nicely as she could, but I can definitely still see how you would be offended - I would too.
I just feel stupid now. And so does she, obviously. Its so awkward.
fallinlove91407
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Isn't July 1 a really early response date for a 9/22 wedding??
We just mailed out our invites for our 9/14 wedding with a response of 8/14
carolinebr
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Posted by fallinlove91407
Isn't July 1 a really early response date for a 9/22 wedding??
We just mailed out our invites for our 9/14 wedding with a response of 8/14
I thought that was odd too. Maybe they did that intentionally so they would have time to invite the B list? Not sure...
Sept07Bride
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Ugh!
leafgirl
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If she is a close friend of yours I don't think you should be offended. Weddings are hard to fit everyone you want in. Especially when big families are involved. It seems like she is feeling so ackward about it herself so what's the point of feeling offended... Simply think that you could have just saved yourself some moolah...
portjeffbride
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I know there are definite practical reasons for an A and B list, but no matter how you execute it, it will end up with tacky situations like that. Guests could also discuss the RSVP date, and discover they have different dates....
I dunno.... I would avoid that whole situation and just send out all of them at once....
Summer07Bride
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Posted by fallinlove91407
Isn't July 1 a really early response date for a 9/22 wedding??
We just mailed out our invites for our 9/14 wedding with a response of 8/14
That is definitely early. One of FH's friends mailed his April 1 with an RSVP date of May 1 for hie Sept 1 wedding. At that point, I had not even ordered my invites for my July 21 wedding
I do agree with the B-list needing separate invites with a different date. Luckily we combined that two lists and just sent them all out at once. If we did hsve to send out a few more, I was planning on doing some DIY Invites with a new RSVP Date, there was no way I was writing an email like that.
