VERY IMPORTANT--i really need your help..

the future mrs m Posted: Nov 09, 2007 10:22 AM

VERY IMPORTANT--i really need your help..

So, tomorrow night is my engagemnet party at the Chateau Briand. We are having about 65 people. The manager that I dealt with last night when I went to pay my final bill gave me 2 envelopes. He said one was for the 'bridal attendant' and the suggested tip was $125 and for the maitre'd the tip was $200-400. what do you think? I don't think I am going to need teh bridal attendant which i didn't even know about til last night. Do you think this is all too much??

MJDoc12 Posted: Nov 09, 2007 10:25 AM

Re: VERY IMPORTANT--i really need your help..

i do think that is a bit much--i mean its an e-party not a wedding. i don't quite understand having to give so much considering that its just a party and you are not going to require the type of attention that would be necessary as a wedding.

i don't think i would tip that much--but then again i didn't have an e-party... so i don't know if that's the norm..but it seems a bit much.

rocketsummer17 Posted: Nov 09, 2007 10:27 AM

Re: VERY IMPORTANT--i really need your help..

wait, you get a bridal attendant for an engagement party?? I have never heard of that before...are you sure the guy knows it an engagement party and not a wedding? I understand the tip for the maitre d but not a bridal attendant...i also think that for an engagement party a tip of $400 dollars for a maite d' is a bit excessive....

Good luck with the tipping situation and have a blast at your party!!!

the future mrs m Posted: Nov 09, 2007 10:28 AM

Re: VERY IMPORTANT--i really need your help..

Thank you rocket and mjdoc.. I am freaking out. I was blown away by the fact that he even gave me the envelopes. I already have to tip the dj, singer, limo driver, etc... and now a bridal attendant? What else will I really need? The party is only 4 hours. thanks for your help. what would YOU give?

MJDoc12 Posted: Nov 09, 2007 10:35 AM

Re: VERY IMPORTANT--i really need your help..

Posted by the future mrs m

Thank you rocket and mjdoc.. I am freaking out. I was blown away by the fact that he even gave me the envelopes. I already have to tip the dj, singer, limo driver, etc... and now a bridal attendant? What else will I really need? The party is only 4 hours. thanks for your help. what would YOU give?

i honestly am not sure what i'd give! lol i mean it seems like so much--i know it sounds bad but i would cut the maitre d' tip in half probably--i mean like i said, they are not having to do the same as they would for a wedding. i think they might be trying to take advantage a little bit

as for the bridal attendant--i would ask the hall if that is truly necessary for you to have one. cause that would imply that you would be in a bridal suite--with the attendant at your beck and call. that's just odd. in reality the maitre d' or Captain would handle your drink and food orders--you don't need a BA!

bluegreen08 Posted: Nov 09, 2007 11:05 AM

Re: VERY IMPORTANT--i really need your help..

Posted by the future mrs m

Thank you rocket and mjdoc.. I am freaking out. I was blown away by the fact that he even gave me the envelopes. I already have to tip the dj, singer, limo driver, etc... and now a bridal attendant? What else will I really need? The party is only 4 hours. thanks for your help. what would YOU give?

I don't think you need a bridal attendant for an engagment party -- what would she do? I understand her services might be included 'free' but if you have to tip her $100+ it's not really 'free' anymore!

You have a DJ *and* a singer, limos, etc? Maybe your e-party IS like a mini wedding and you will need the bridal attendant to help keep everything under control?

I had an e-party but it was a luncheon at an italian restaurant for ~ 90 people, no band, no DJ, no limos, no bridal attendant, etc...

dancinmyazoff Posted: Nov 09, 2007 11:06 AM

Re: VERY IMPORTANT--i really need your help..

There's no need for a bridal attendant for an engagement party, and while I would tip the maitre'd it would definitely NOT be no $200-$400. Again it's not a wedding just a 4 hr e-party. I would call up the person you originally dealt with and speak with them.

Dr Meg Posted: Nov 09, 2007 11:11 AM

Re: VERY IMPORTANT--i really need your help..

Maybe he didn't realize it was for an eparty and not a wedding. I'd call to clarify and if he was right, tell them you don't need the bridal attendant, cause you aren't a bride yet.

TrueLoveIn2008 Posted: Nov 09, 2007 11:16 AM

Re: VERY IMPORTANT--i really need your help..

I would tip the maitre d $50 and tell them NO bridal attendant. BRIDAL attendant means you are a BRIDE - and while you are a soon to be bride, you aren't one yet and don't need an attendant. Wow. The lengths some halls will go to to get more money out of us ....

Kara and Todd Posted: Nov 09, 2007 11:45 AM

Re: VERY IMPORTANT--i really need your help..

1. Bridal attendant at an engagement party??

2. Maitre'd tip of $200 - 400 for 65 people at an engagement party?

Both of those are ridiculous.

I'd give $50 to the bridal attendant and $125 to the maitre'd ($2 per person).

It's not a wedding... And tips are optional anyway. I'm not cheap, but those suggestions are insane to me.

Kara and Todd Posted: Nov 09, 2007 11:45 AM

Re: VERY IMPORTANT--i really need your help..

Posted by jboothin2008

I would tip the maitre d $50 and tell them NO bridal attendant. BRIDAL attendant means you are a BRIDE - and while you are a soon to be bride, you aren't one yet and don't need an attendant. Wow. The lengths some halls will go to to get more money out of us ....

Actually, I think this suggestion is far better than mine...

jenn122397 Posted: Nov 09, 2007 12:32 PM

Re: VERY IMPORTANT--i really need your help..

i dont get why they are giving you a bridal attendant - you shouldnt have to pay for something you dont need or didnt request

as for teh maitre'd i would say $250 is generous - $400 is a bit much
usually you tip $3-4 per person

Tori9299 Posted: Nov 09, 2007 12:35 PM

Re: VERY IMPORTANT--i really need your help..

I don't think you are going to need to tip anyone.

kabo0831 Posted: Nov 09, 2007 12:43 PM

Re: VERY IMPORTANT--i really need your help..

i would do like 100 and 100 that is it , it is not a wedding and they shouldnt be getting that much

beachbum05 Posted: Nov 09, 2007 01:33 PM

Re: VERY IMPORTANT--i really need your help..

That is the most ridiculous thing I've ever heard of.

Wow.

I'd tip $100 to the maitre d and be done with it. NO need for a bridal attendant. Wow.

rocketsummer17 Posted: Nov 09, 2007 02:03 PM

Re: VERY IMPORTANT--i really need your help..

I wouldnt not give the BA anything, and would request not to have one, like I said before this is not a wedding!!!! I would give the maitre d 50-100 dollars....figuring 1 or 2 dollars per guest (some places say it is $1 pp for a wedding so $2 pp for an e-party is generous)

Just make sure to clarify with the place that they know it is an eparty...it seems like they are trying to milk you for all your money for this!!

beram63 Posted: Nov 09, 2007 05:15 PM

Re: VERY IMPORTANT--i really need your help..

i heard a tip for the maitre d FOR A WEDDING is usually $2-4 per guest, which means a $250 tip is on the upper end of generous for your guest list. it sounds like he' s taking advantage.

mrsjpc3 Posted: Nov 09, 2007 06:23 PM

Re: VERY IMPORTANT--i really need your help..

I would call there and tell them to nix the bridal attendant. Why would you need that? I think the tips they are suggesting are very pricey. If you must have them, tip $100 each. It's a small get together, it seems excessive to me.