Waiting to set a date, advice....

Waiting to set a date, advice....

Hi everybody. I have been a member for sometime due the fact that my SIL encouraged me to read stories before I got engaged. I love the advice and sometimes I feel like everyone knows everyone. It is soooo great! Anyway, I finally got engaged to the most wonderful man, but he wants to take the slow road and I want to plan, plan, plan. I think the problem is that we both agreed to 'enjoy being engaged' and then put the pedal to the metal. It has been 2mths and people are asking 'Why aren't you setting the date?' and 'When are you getting married?' I am fine with it, until my mom and brother wonder why? I explain to them about what my FH and I have discussed but I tend to become persuaded to set the date quicker because justifing 'why' tends to get annoying. Did any of you go through this? It is so fustrating.

Re: Waiting to set a date, advice....

If there's no reason that the date is not yet set, other than you guys (both) want to take it slow, I wouldn't worry too much about it. It's possible your mom and brother want to make sure everything's alright between you and FH. In the end, though, it's important to do what's best for you guys and your relationship instead of placating others. JMO.

Re: Waiting to set a date, advice....

Re: Waiting to set a date, advice....

He put the ring on my finger went to his mothers house and shes congrats so did u set the date yet? I was like let me enjoy being engaged. Take your time if u arent in a rush. Just because u dont have a date doesnt mean u cant look around at different ideas.

Re: Waiting to set a date, advice....

Thank you for the replys. I guess I just wanted to see if anyone else got 'questions'. My FH and I are paying for our entire wedding and before the fun-CRAZIEST starts we just want to enjoy the moments....

Re: Waiting to set a date, advice....

I deleted what I wrote after reading you last post. It didn't apply.

Re: Waiting to set a date, advice....

It isn't only him that wants to go slow, I want to also. I have waited for this moment my entire life and I will never be able to say again that I am engaged. It's fun going to all the Expos and stuff, but sometimes people think that looking is the same as booking. Thanks again...

Re: Waiting to set a date, advice....

I guess I lucked out being in the military we had time because I kept deploying

Re: Waiting to set a date, advice....

Re: Waiting to set a date, advice....

We were engaged for a year before we set a date!! Dont rush anything especially if you want to enjoy being engaged! I was in no hurry to get married so I really LOVED getting used to the fact ..what really took so long was finding a place, we wanted a quaint place with fireplaces, it sounds easy, but let me tell you we looked EVERYWHERE, throughout NJ and PA and you would not believe some of the CRAP we saw..so it took us awhile to find the place, once we found it, we set the date and then had a year to plan it..it was fun! Set the date when you and FH are good and ready, everyone else is just excited for you and want to know when the big day is..enjoy the excitement because as soon as you set the date, everyone will start asking you when you'll start having kids!!!

Re: Waiting to set a date, advice....

tiakisses..I love that picture!!!

Re: Waiting to set a date, advice....

Like that idea...We are not having an engagement party. We did a small gathering with family which was nice. My FH and I have fun with the 'stuff' about the wedding i.e. songs, invites, ideas, favors, etc. I guess in truth, the RIGHT place hasen't popped out yet. In the mean time it's all about fun, but sometimes family will kill ya'
Ha-Ha (love em' so much though.)

Re: Waiting to set a date, advice....

Ignore them, if you can. we got engaged in june and really set the date and started planning in january. we had so much going on, between school and work, that the wedding was put on hold. tell people that you really want a beautiful wedding and want to put a lot of thought into it and that will take some time. good luck

Re: Waiting to set a date, advice....

aliciahelene-you are sooooo right. My FH is a biker who wants the relaxed atmosphere while I am a lil' bit biker and a lil' bit traditional. Love the biker mentality ( it's not the destination, it's the journey). He has asked every place we visited if we could be announced on his harley. Amazingly enough, some actual loved the idea. I love the fireplace thing too!!! Where did you end up going?

Re: Waiting to set a date, advice....

I love that Harley idea!!! that would knock everyones socks off!!! We got married at the GW manor, they even have a beautoful fireplace in teh bathroom, we were VERY happy with our decision and it was everything we wanted!!! I am still getting compliments on the service and the food! I do know that there are alot of great places in Long Island with fireplaces...we were so sick of looking, traveling to PA was exhausting because we like to stay overnight , but we kept getting so disapointed, when we saw GW manor, we both fell in love.

Re: Waiting to set a date, advice....

GW Manor I think is a bit far for me. I am in Eastern Suffolk. Our price range is 80-90 including tax/tip. Not a bad, bad price but makes it a bit limited. We have looked at alot of the halls posted on the site, but nothing wow'd me yet. However, all very nice but I think the day we book, something we would of loved more will pop up. Not sure what to do so just having 'FUN' and saving $$$$. The ideas keep flowing though......my FH has tons of them.... Any good advice to assist us during our search?

Re: Waiting to set a date, advice....

We got engaged in Sept 2002. We got so many questions: who what where when why... so annoying! We assumend we would get married in 2005. In 2003 we set the date for 2004. Now it is almost here. it went so fast. It is still a 2 year engagement and seems so long to others though. it is because they don't have to do any of the planning or paying!

Re: Waiting to set a date, advice....

You are so right.

Re: Waiting to set a date, advice....

Im in Jersey, Bergen county, so the GW manor was only 45 minutes ona good day, could take up to two hours though which I hated. having a two year engagement was great for us, we were able to save up and pay everything off. I learned so many great ideas off of this web site, the girls on here are so creative and so helpful...the beverly clark book really helped me alot, but I think this web site helped me more!

Re: Waiting to set a date, advice....

Thanks again....