wedding is OFF!!!- long

Hi girls! I've been away for a while trying to come to grips with my new situation...the wedding is off.
I caught my FH cheating on me.
Here's the scenario: My gal pals wanted to take me away from planning and out to dinner & drinks, my FH was more than happy for me to go out (little did I know at the time why,) so I went. We had a nice time eating, laughing, drinking, discussing the big day... I decided to call my FH and give him a heads-up about how things were going, but when I called he didn't pick-up and the machine answered. I left a message saying I was just checking in and I'd talk to him later, blah, blah... BUT just as I was about to hang up SHE picked up the phone. SHE said, 'who is this?' I calmly said back, 'who is this?' SHE said, 'It's Josh's girlfriend.' I almost fell off my chair. I calmy said to her, ' Really, well this is Josh's fiance.' SHE said 'He told me all about you and your obsession with him. Honey you have to face it, he broke up with you, it's over. Move on with your life.' I was trying not to throw up and said to her, 'What are you talking about? We're getting married in November.' SHE said, 'I feel bad for you, it seems like you're not living in the real world, you're not engaged to him anymore, and you really need to let go and stop having delusions that you are getting back together with Josh, He's mine and that's it!' Since my eyes were swelled up w/ tears and the lump in my throat prevented me from saying anything else I hung up and balled like a baby to my gals. (thank God for them...) Anyway, I talked to him the next day he said sorry that I had to find out this way, that he realized he wasn't ready to settle down yet and that he didn't think he loved me, that he didn't think he was ever in love with me (ouch!) Anyway, I went to Florida w/ my cousin and have been just trying to relax and focus on something else, it's been really really hard though. I know it's going to take some time. My family/friends have been great and totally supporting of me and ready to kill him. I just wanted to say to each and every one of you out there: good luck with the rest of your planning. I wish you all nothing but the best in life love & happiness. I know this was all for the best, it'll just take a while for me to really believe it... Hopefully one day in the future when I do meet the real Mr. Right, I'll come back to chat here and do this all over again. It's been fun and very helpful. My best to you guys, Jenna

Re: wedding is OFF!!!- long

I am soo sorry that this happened to you Jenna. It seems as though you are dealing with the whole situtation very well. I wish you nothig but health and happiness with your life and in time you will realize that it was better that this happened now rather than later. Feel free to email me if you ever need anything.

Re: wedding is OFF!!!- long

a similar thing happened to a friend at work recently, they were 8 weeks away from their wedding - he told her he wasn't feeling well and made her go to an engagement party alone, after the party she went to his apt. let herself in, and about 10 minutes later he walked in with his 'girlfriend' who he had been at the Jewel concert with! These stories are crazy, men can be so terrible, I'm glad you're moving on, good luck to you!

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Sweetie in time you will heal and you will feel better. It is way better you found out now than when you 2 went as far as marriage. I know someone it happened to, some of these men are such wimps instead of telling a woman that he does not want marriage and let you move on with your life, they go as far as proposing and buying a ring and live a whole other life. All the best to you sweetie. You will definitely find someone who will be the one. When you do we will be here to help you plan the wedding of your dreams

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WOW! I am so sorry! I am actually mad that he could do this to you! I'm so glad you found out now than to go through with a marrage and find out then. He is not a man for keeping this from you. What was he waiting for? You are so much better off with out him (I do know you know this, but I just had to say it). I'm glad you are taking this time for yourself. The next time you are engaged will be the one that leads you to a life time of happiness. We are always here for you.

Best of luck!
Kelly

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I am so sorry to hear this. It really ***** that he did this to you, but sometimes things happen for the better, as cliche as this might sound. He really should have been mature and expressed his feelings to you alot sooner instead of having to hear it from some girl who you don't even know. Stories like this really make me angry because there is no reason for people to hurt people like this, granted sometimes feelings change, but come on discuss it before your a couple of months away from being married. Just think if you wouldn't have called that night would he have ever told? Well all I have to say is that you'll get through it and one day the right person will come along and be a real man.

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I am so very sorry to hear this happened to you. Like the other girls said, it is better that this happened now than after the wedding. (I hope he paid all the deposits on the vendors! ) I wish you all the best in moving on and getting everything with him settled. There is a wonderful man out there who will treat you like you deserve to be treated. I know you will find him!

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What a spineless a-hole!!!!!! Oooh, I just wanna pounce on the guy!


I'm so sorry, but like the other girls said, better to find out now than after the wedding. You deserve so much better and I have no doubt that you will find him! (something similar happened to me) One day you'll be able to look back and say 'Thank god!!!!'

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You are one amazing woman. You are dealing with this so well!!!! I think I would make flyers with his picture just to let everyone know he's a cheater. You are good!

Keep you r head up and know that you always have support here!!

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My ex fiancee from a few years ago was cheating on me thru the internet and the personals in the paper because after my best friend started to answer ads becuase she was looking for Mr.Right we found out what a !@#$$%^ kind of person he was. I dumped him so fast, and got on with my life. I then meet Mr.Right not too far after that when I was not looking for him. I was upset when all this was going on, but so happy I did not end up in a bad situation. (Divorced with a kid or two) He got married this past year and I found out he is miserable! Good things will come to you, all the best!

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THere is nothing to say. You will come out of this in time. Know that you are a wonderful girl and in time this will all make sense.

Who wants to marry a no good &^&^$((((( anyway.

JERK OFF

We'll see you back on this board with somebody who deserves your beautiful self.

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Hun I know you dont believe this right now but it sounds as if you are better off, better now than later when you have wasted years of your life.

Things happen for reasons and I am sure you will see that in time, keep your chin up, now its time to focus on you, forget about sharing your life with someone, its your life and do with it what youve always wanted to.

Good Luck Sweetie

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I know you have gotten a lot of responses, but I just wanted to add my support to the mix. What a horrible thing to have happen. I can't imagine how you are feeling. But I hope things begin to look better and you start to feel like yourself again. Good luck in everything you do.

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I got nauseous after reading this. Just know my heart goes out to you. I'm sure it's hard right now, just stay positive and close to your family and friends, and of course come back and chat here when you feel the need. All the best.

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you are definitely a strong woman...good for you for dealing so well!! it IS for the best and you're right, it will take some time to heal...best of luck to you and hang in there!!! we're all here if you need to talk....and never forget that was goes around comes aorund....

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Wow. When I logged on this evening, I did not expect to see something as completely shocking and upseting as this. Honey, my heart goes out to you. There's nothing any of us can say to take away the hurt. Gosh, NO ONE deserves to be treated this way. What a **insert choice words here**

I can, from experience, say that yes...you will go on. Only recently have I been able to see that the terrible, terrible breakup I went through years ago was just leading me on to bigger and better things. If my ex and I didn't break up, I'd never have found the wonderful man I'm in love with now, the one who truly cherishes me, my best friend and soulmate.

They say that God has a bigger plan for all of us. It may not be clear now, but it will be soon. Til then, surround yourself with those who love you and keep up with the great, positive attitude you seem to have. I admire it!

Keep your chin up and be strong. Talk if you need to talk, cry if you need to cry. Be honest and true with your feelings. There will be tough days and then a couple will pass that aren't so bad. Then some days will actually be good.

I'd be so happy to come back to give advice as an old married lady and to see you here!

Best wishes to you

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I am so sorry to hear about this. Try to stay strong, keep your chin up and be positive. Life sometimes throws a curve ball at us and it's just best to take it and roll with the punches.

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I am really sorry this happened to you, but WOW, by your post you seem like a strong woman! Keep that attitude and you will be fine. It is better that you found out now rather than later. Don't worry, prince charming will come along!

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The Story of Two Bags

About 9 years ago I had a new, strong bag that looked fantastic, I could take it anywhere with me an people always commented on it. One girlfriend even 'jokingly' commented on can she 'borrow' it from me some time. But I did not know that on Fridays my bag could be nowhere to be found. I started looking at the bag a little differently.

I went travelling and decided to leave that bag at home, it had lost some of it's shine.

Just before I was due to come back I received a call...my bag had run away from home. Well I cried for just a bit and realized that that bag had more problems than I realised. It was not durable, the inside was very tatty, the zipper refused to shut properly, and to be honest it was getting a little old.

About 5 years ago I left the country and on my arrival into the other country a new bag appeared infront of me. It was not my usual type of bag but it was cute. Well I could not put this bag down. It came with me whereever I went. I kept looking for faults but there were none. I eventually got used to this bag. I started to find gifts within this bag. I finally got the message to keep this bag.

I now sleep with this bag and will never let it go because it has character and class.

I hope you find a really good durable bag.

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Wow I am so sorry, for you and for the other girl because she sounds pitiful. Obviously if he did it to you, he'll do it to her too. I personally would never be with a guy who cheats, because they only do it again & again! Lucky you..you found out before not after and you aren't wasting your life with sc&m!
All the best. I know we will see you on here again!