WEIRD invitation

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Posted by JIFFY

edit: What's a ponctillious? I can't believe there is a word that I have never heard of. I am so looking that up!

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Punctilious means strict adherence to formalities.

I think what bugs me is that I was going to be a nun. I understand religion. I was a strict Catholic for a long time. I always believed that Christ was present in everything we did. I never thought Christ would be offended by chit chat during mass. *sigh*

To each his own. I guess I just don't feel like this is the right service for me to attend. I mean... I have 2 children out of wedlock. I don't think that I would be welcome by such punctilious folk.

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Posted by rojerono

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Posted by JIFFY

edit: What's a ponctillious? I can't believe there is a word that I have never heard of. I am so looking that up!

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Punctilious means strict adherence to formalities.

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Yes it does!!! Thank you!!! I looked it up. I can't believe I never heard it before. I haven't even read that word in a book. It's great! Tomorrow it is going to be my word of the day!

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Posted by rojerono

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Posted by JIFFY

edit: What's a ponctillious? I can't believe there is a word that I have never heard of. I am so looking that up!

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Punctilious means strict adherence to formalities.

I think what bugs me is that I was going to be a nun. I understand religion. I was a strict Catholic for a long time. I always believed that Christ was present in everything we did. I never thought Christ would be offended by chit chat during mass. *sigh*

To each his own. I guess I just don't feel like this is the right service for me to attend. I mean... I have 2 children out of wedlock. I don't think that I would be welcome by such punctilious folk.

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If they're using words like punctilious and giving you an 8 page instruction manual on how you should behave at the ceremony, how much fun is the reception afterward going to be, honestly?

Are they born again christian's? The way it's written it seems that way. Just go the way you would normally go and if someone has the audacity to say ANYTHING to you at the actual wedding then I would leave (with the card...no j/k kinda). People are coming to the wedding to celebrate the happiness of two people getting married there shouldn't be stipulations as to what each guest wears or acts like. If they are so strict about those things then they should have a small private ceremony and reception.

i can completely respect their desire for 'their' wedding.

i am a born again christian, and that doesn't sound like a born again christian wedding invitation.

anyone who has faith in our lord and savior Jesus, would gladly open their church doors to those who don't usually 'know religion'.

i, too, would be offended by an invitation like that.

i, too, am curious as to how well you know this couple.

They are Catholics. I have never even MET them. They are friends of my FH's mother. Oh well. I hope she has a beautiful wedding day that is all that she expects and desires. I will send a gift... but I am not gonna go. If the invitation makes me feel this uncomfortable, I can't imagine how the actual service and reception will make me feel.

FH & I went to a wedding a few years ago and the couple belonged to a 'traditional' catholic church.....everything was in latin...we didn't have to wear anything on our heads, but it was interesting and odd at the same time to be listening to it in latin. We were given a program that included a translation.....and it was like being in the 1950's....it was all about how woman should serve man, bear his children and respect him.....I know this is not necessarily how the catholic church is, but this is what they decided to have in their ceremony.

Very weird!!

Yeah, doesnt sound like much fun to me either. I guess if I were the Bride, I would only invite those whom I thought were 'Punctilious'. I think it is offensive to the rest of us and our sinful behavior

Personally, I would not go. I would feel really out of place. Plus I look to good in low cut dresses to cover up

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Posted by ILUVDC


Personally, I would not go. I would feel really out of place. Plus I look to good in low cut dresses to cover up

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Good one

That is just weird-me personally, I wouldn't go.

Odd!

You know what I don't like about all that? They leave no room for people of other faiths to allow them to express their own views and traditions through dress. It's their way or the highway.

It's one thing to be respectful and not to wear jeans and sneakers. But it's quite another to be so specific about what skin can be covered, what cannot, how long your skirt has to be, etc.

If I, say, believe that my face must be covered and or wear red to the ceremony (which is considered to be 'lucky' or 'festive' in other cultures), should I be chastised for being a sinner or not going along with the church's view of how I should dress?

Are there going to be holy bouncers, checking people at the door? This sounds so ridiculous to me. I don't want to insult anyone's beliefs or faith, I'm just of the opinion that people should be free to have their own beliefs without being told what to do.

Sorry for the rant. Hearing things like this make me glad we did our ceremony the way we did. With a focus on love and committment to each other, not what the guests were wearing.

And I'm totally PMS'ing.

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Posted by JeanineP2B

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Posted by ILUVDC


Personally, I would not go. I would feel really out of place. Plus I look to good in low cut dresses to cover up

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Good one

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i'd go and dress any way i wanted. jk

i probably wouldn't go either...anyone that hung up can well....you know.


on a side note: having been a single mom and living with DH before we were married, i felt the same way about being in churches. it just felt wrong somehow.

ok, I guess I am the odd man out but...

I would go and wouldn't be offended. I think that they are expressing their wishes for their wedding which is clearly a retro-Catholic ceremony. If I was invited to a wedding where the couples religious practices were not familiar I would want it explained so that I did not ruin or taint their day in any way. It is important to know that a wedding is not meant to insult anyone and that if their belief asks you to adorn yourself a certain way and it is non-offensive (meaning they aren't asking you to do something embarrising or demeaning) then I think it is polite to spell it out for guests. Imagine how embarrassed you would be if you showed up and they asked you to leave because their was a dress code you didn't know about.

I think that you need to decide if you want to celebrate their love and marraige not if you want to go because it is going to be a 'cool' party or not.

I don't mean this to be harsh and I am sorry if it comes accross this way. I am not an incredibly religious person but I can understand how they may have been trying to be sure that all guests could attend.

On a side not, I think it is odd that you were invited to a wedding of people that you don't know because they are friends of your FMIL. I wouldn't go because I didn't know them. But I would send a note back telling them that I regretfully decline.