Weird or not?

I was recently in a similar position. I was invited to the shower of a fiancee of one of FH's friends. There is a cluster of college friends that he has that socialize rather frequently and they always include the wives, fiancee's and girlfriends at these occasions. I had just been introduced to the group and FH had already responded to the wedding with me as his date, so I think they may have felt a sense of obligation to invite me to the shower. I wasn't able to go, but I did shop and purchase a gift online as I knew I would be seeing these people again soon thus entering a new circle of friends. I would not have been offended had I not received an invitation.

Yes, sometimes people do 'ask for gifts' at times - but showers are different. Showers are events that women(and men) often count on to furnish a new home with items that the couple does not have. IMO ENGAGEMENT PARTIES are unnecessary functions.

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Posted by Goldi1021

I was recently in a similar position. I was invited to the shower of a fiancee of one of FH's friends. There is a cluster of college friends that he has that socialize rather frequently and they always include the wives, fiancee's and girlfriends at these occasions. I had just been introduced to the group and FH had already responded to the wedding with me as his date, so I think they may have felt a sense of obligation to invite me to the shower. I wasn't able to go, but I did shop and purchase a gift online as I knew I would be seeing these people again soon thus entering a new circle of friends. I would not have been offended had I not received an invitation.

Yes, sometimes people do 'ask for gifts' at times - but showers are different. Showers are events that women(and men) often count on to furnish a new home with items that the couple does not have. IMO ENGAGEMENT PARTIES are unnecessary functions.

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But if they are counting on them to furnish a home, isn't that asking for a gift? I am not sure what the distinction is that you are trying to make. Not trying to attack you, just curious...

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Posted by dpli

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Posted by Goldi1021

I was recently in a similar position. I was invited to the shower of a fiancee of one of FH's friends. There is a cluster of college friends that he has that socialize rather frequently and they always include the wives, fiancee's and girlfriends at these occasions. I had just been introduced to the group and FH had already responded to the wedding with me as his date, so I think they may have felt a sense of obligation to invite me to the shower. I wasn't able to go, but I did shop and purchase a gift online as I knew I would be seeing these people again soon thus entering a new circle of friends. I would not have been offended had I not received an invitation.

Yes, sometimes people do 'ask for gifts' at times - but showers are different. Showers are events that women(and men) often count on to furnish a new home with items that the couple does not have. IMO ENGAGEMENT PARTIES are unnecessary functions.

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But if they are counting on them to furnish a home, isn't that asking for a gift? I am not sure what the distinction is that you are trying to make. Not trying to attack you, just curious...

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Didn't feel attacked.

I was simply speaking in terms of general tradition of showers. Showers exist for a purpose. I think people invite and do what they consider to be socially acceptable rather than running the risk of alienating people they may see in their social circles.

Sounds like someone wants as many gifts as possible....

Can I do this too?