It doesn't look like we'll be able to afford day care.... I really don't know what in the world we are going to do -- I HAVE to work. I'm curious what everyone else is doing and if you can, PLEASE share how much you are paying for child care.
God if I had the money -- I'd hire a nanny in SECOND!!
Matt'sbride
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Re: What are you doing about child care?
I too am going to keep working - although I am going to try to get a 4 day work week once I get back to work....I think we'll hire a nanny although I don't really know how we are going to find one (would love to get a referral) or how much they cost yet.....I only have 3 months left until the little one arrives but I get 3 months maternity leave to try to figure this all out. It is overwhelming so I know how you feel!!!! What about looking into a local day care that's run out of someone's home? There is a woman that does it around here and from what i hear, it costs less than an 'official' day care....
JimmysBride
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Re: What are you doing about child care?
Posted by Matt'sbride
I too am going to keep working - although I am going to try to get a 4 day work week once I get back to work....I think we'll hire a nanny although I don't really know how we are going to find one (would love to get a referral) or how much they cost yet.....I only have 3 months left until the little one arrives but I get 3 months maternity leave to try to figure this all out. It is overwhelming so I know how you feel!!!! What about looking into a local day care that's run out of someone's home? There is a woman that does it around here and from what i hear, it costs less than an 'official' day care....
We did!! We found someone 2 houses down from us and I thought I was saved...until I found out she costs just as much as daycare!!!
Monkeybride
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Re: What are you doing about child care?
I know that you want to keep working but if you can't afford day care does it make sense for you to keep working or does you not working put you in the same financial position?
We aren't in NY anymore and luckily my mom is moving here and I plan to work PT after the baby arrives otherwise I am not sure what I would do because I personally refused to use daycare of any kind until my child was old enough to talk (again just my personal feelings) so thank goodness with DH's schedule, me working PT and my mom it should all work out.
Hang in there. I am sure something will work out. Do either of your jobs offer discounts anywhere? I know some employers have discounts at daycares.
JimmysBride
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Re: What are you doing about child care?
No.... we need my salary...even paying for daycare my paycheck helps. It's just that our lifestyle will have to scaled back so much with the cost of daycare. Technically we can afford the day care, and pay all of our bills comfortably, and eat, and that's it. We'd be just about breaking even with maybe a few bucks left to spare. I can't live like that. Just the thought of it is so depressing.
I really wish I had one of our moms around to help out, but that's just not the case since they both live out of state.
The only other option we have is my Dad & his girlfriend. Unfortunately, I feel about them taking care of my child probably the way you feel about day care. But it looks like that's going to be our only choice.
btrflygrl
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Re: What are you doing about child care?
You say that only having a few bucks left isn't good enough? Unfortunately, living and raising a child in NY costs an arm and a leg. You should try taking the money you are going to spend on daycare (as if the child were already here) and see if you can live without that money in your budget. That will give you your answer. That is what being a parent is all about...that everything you do, earn, say is for that child or affects your child. Your life will forever be different...and your lifestyle has to reflect that for most of us. There are the 'lucky few' that don't have to change their lifestyle when a child comes.
We refuse to do daycare when the time comes. I work in a church preschool and I don't know if they take little ones...I know the youngest we have is a year old. I cannot accept someone else raising my child. I'd rather eat cereal all the time than someone raise my child.
We ALREADY live with only a few bucks to spare and we've learned to appreciate such little and simple things that our lives have become so much more enriched.
amy&anthony
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Re: What are you doing about child care?
Well I need someone full time from 8 am - 4 pm. (Im a teacher) First I went with someone private - a neighbor with one child and I paid her $1,000/month.
Then I found out preschool was only $700/month and they work with a kinde4rgarten curriculum, playground is huge, theres only 7 in his class, he loves the kids and teachers! I am so happy! I finally dont feel guilty anymore.
If you have to stay home because you cant afford daycare you can watch a few children yourself for some $$ and your child would have someone to play with.
Or, I know the government has something that has to do with free childcare.. I almost did it but then my situation improved.
Let me know if I can be of any help :) BTW - I stayed home for the first year and at mustard sandwiches. I was poor but theyre only young once!
Hazeleyes33
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Re: What are you doing about child care?
Maybe you can look into home daycares. My daughter used to go to a sitter last year when she had half day kindergarten and it was much cheaper than a regular daycare. I am lucky because my company contributes 25% to my daycare, otherwise we could not afford it. I have to say though, after having my daughter in daycare for 5 years and my son for a year now, it is not as bad as everyone thinks. I think people hear one-sided stories and make assumptions of what daycare is like. Maybe I am lucky because my son has very good teachers and I have not had a problem. I have never felt like 'the daycare' was raising my children. My husband and I raise them. We give them the proper values and morals and the daycare continues with that while they are with them. I have never felt like I missed any of their firsts. Any first I see, IS their first. Just because someone stays at home with their children does not mean they are 'better' children. My daughter is exactly like the other children in her class whose moms stayed home with them. Sorry, just my 2 cents!
antoinette
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Re: What are you doing about child care?
this is why Im not planning on working-- I literally would be working to pay the daycare and why would I do that?
soon2bMrs
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Re: What are you doing about child care?
Have you considered an Au pair. Everyone in Ireland uses them and loves them. We had dinner at a couple's home who works with DH and they had an au pair from Germany. The other couple also had an au pair. I think they are cheaper than a nanny. In Ireland I think they are paying them something like 60 Euro a week, plus the room and board. I am not sure if you would want someone living with you, but it might be something you are interested in. Here is a website they recommended
both sites can help you find affordable day care, and give you advice on how to find a reputable day care.
StepherG
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Re: What are you doing about child care?
I know where you are coming from. I'm surprised at one of the responses....it really irked me. Going from having some $$ to NO $$ is really tough! I've been checking into daycare as well and its REALLY expensive and like you - I need to work. Recently my husband refinanced somethings...moved stuff into our HELOC and basically 'shifted' money around so that it frees up some of our monthly expenses. That way, when the baby comes we are financially hurting as much as we thought we would be. We were in your EXACT situation. Rasining a child on Long Island is tough. We're not sure if we'll EVER be able to have a second child....where will that $$ come from?
ANyway, good luck to you...if I can help at all let me know. We are going to be using Tutor Time in Middle Island, They are $220 per week or $930 per month.
Stephanie
Monkeybride
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Re: What are you doing about child care?
Posted by soon2bMrs
Have you considered an Au pair. Everyone in Ireland uses them and loves them. We had dinner at a couple's home who works with DH and they had an au pair from Germany. The other couple also had an au pair. I think they are cheaper than a nanny. In Ireland I think they are paying them something like 60 Euro a week, plus the room and board. I am not sure if you would want someone living with you, but it might be something you are interested in. Here is a website they recommended
I considered looking into this as well if for some reason I have to go back to work FT. I think I might be more comfortable with someone watching a child in my home and it also might help out some with meals and light housework which I believe some will do.
It's hard when you realize how much your life will change with a child. This is starting to hit me now. I don't think you have to give up everything to be home with a child. Plenty of children go to daycare and are fine and if it comes down to us having a comfortable life vs. penny pinching and being broke I will go back FT. I am just fortunate that now I will have my mom here if that happens. Financial stress is the worst and work FT doesn't make you less of a parent, maybe in some ways it makes you wiser because you will have a financial ground to stand on. There are so many things to save for when you have children...field trips, college, weddings, etc. How can you ever get ahead if you don't have enought money.
OK sorry for the rant, we are just all in different situations and one can't say what is better for the other.
It will all work out. You have a lot of time to explore different things and you will find what's right for you. I think most important is you and DH have to be comfortable with the final decision.
antoinette
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Re: What are you doing about child care?
Posted by antoinette
this is why Im not planning on working-- I literally would be working to pay the daycare and why would I do that?
Im sorry I hope nobody took offense to this statement it wasnt meant to be offensive. Its just my opinion that it doesnt make sense for me to use daycare becuase I dont make that much money to begin with and it would be actually costing me more money to go to work.- BUT we are going to be really struggling that is an understatement. -
Hazeleyes33
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Re: What are you doing about child care?
I totally understand where you are coming from. I don't know how we would have been able to afford daycare if my job didn't contribute. It IS expensive and sometimes it just doesn't equal out to what you are getting paid.
