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What do I do or is there anything I can do?

civic24ex Posted:

What do I do or is there anything I can do?

lilacwine Posted:

Re: What do I do or is there anything I can do?



ugh.

Did she ask to wear a different dress?

Maybe there are things you can do to help her feel better about the dress -- something to bring attention to her face, like a shawl or big jewlery or having her hair and makeup done?

FutureAJ8505 Posted:

Re: What do I do or is there anything I can do?

That it not your fault! She told you in the beginning that she loved the dress.
Besides, its your wedding, if thats the dress that you want, then thats the dress that they wear. Do you know how many BM dresses that I have and that I hate, but thats what you do for the bride.
Its not your fault that she does not like the dress anymore. Don't beat yourself up about it. Just tell her that you are sorry, but its too late to change now. Besides, if its weight that she is upset about, then she can do something about it.
I wish you luck.
boobobunny Posted:

Re: What do I do or is there anything I can do?

in all fairness she did say that she like the dress prior to ordering it. I wouldn't get her a different dress.

When we were looking for dresses for my sister's wedding...I didn't like anything....but in all fairness I was pregnant and not feeling very sexy in a room filled with skinny girls. So before you get ready to order another dress....make sure that its the dress she doesn't like and not that she is feeling uncomfortable about her weight. (but of course be carefull about her feelings...the last thing you want is to upset her more.)

Also A -Line or Empire Waist usually do look best for all bridal party of mixed boby types....so if she doesn't like this style....she may not like anything.
civic24ex Posted:

Re: What do I do or is there anything I can do?

Darcy Posted:

Re: What do I do or is there anything I can do?

Is it possible for her to have the dress altered to be an empire dress? That way it won't look too different.

boobobunny Posted:

Re: What do I do or is there anything I can do?

I wouldn't change the dress....this seems to more of her personal issue with herself....then it really is about the dress.

civic24ex Posted:

Re: What do I do or is there anything I can do?

Posted by Darcy

Is it possible for her to have the dress altered to be an empire dress? That way it won't look too different.


Can that really be done? I dont even know what empire looks like. I'll google it and see if it is feasable. On the plus side the lady said it had to be taken in so much she could make another dress out of it. With that said I just dont see how it can look that bad. I dont want to sound harsh but I dont need the added stress with less than 3 weeks to go.
Laura1976 Posted:

Re: What do I do or is there anything I can do?

Posted by FutureAJ8505

That it not your fault! She told you in the beginning that she loved the dress.
Besides, its your wedding, if thats the dress that you want, then thats the dress that they wear. Do you know how many BM dresses that I have and that I hate, but thats what you do for the bride.
Its not your fault that she does not like the dress anymore. Don't beat yourself up about it. Just tell her that you are sorry, but its too late to change now. Besides, if its weight that she is upset about, then she can do something about it.
I wish you luck.


very well said.
Its your day, its not possible to have everyone happy, what is important is that your happy.
CPAPPAS Posted:

Re: What do I do or is there anything I can do?

I had the same problem, but with my sister. I don't think you can really be upset at her. She probably feels really self conscious in the dress..come on girls, we all have been there when something fits horribly and we feel like a feedbag tied in two! ( : Anyway, not sure what the dress looks like, but see if they can order more material to alter the dress to be less form fitting (not sure what it is now) or if any of the other girls have extra material. Seamstresses can do wonders....mine helped my sister alot. (oh, and my sister starved herself for like 2 weeks!). Hope this helps. but remember, i don't think she's trying to make you upset, she probably just feels really bad about herself! Good luck!

civic24ex Posted:

Re: What do I do or is there anything I can do?

As far as extra material there should be plenty as it is being taken in. She lost 50lbs since ordering the dress. This is what the dress looks like. Maybe I am just dumb, but the lady told me A-line is flattering on all figures so I believed her as did my BM.


http://www.barijay.com/720.htm
Darcy Posted:

Re: What do I do or is there anything I can do?

I went through alot of this myself, just trying on a bunch of dresses. I chose and empire for the girls because although none of them are 'overweight' I still had a range and when I put on the A line dresses I even felt like it showed off bellly too much and I am smaller than one of the bridesmaide.

From what i can see, and believe, the dress is form fitting around the belly area and does not flair until the thigh hip area. For an empire, I would just have them take it out at the tummy so that it flowed from just underneith the breasts. Check with the seamstress to make sure this would work for her though before you do it.
civic24ex Posted:

Re: What do I do or is there anything I can do?

Ok i will have her call the seamstress and see if they can do that or not. Hopefully they can. Thanks for all the input girls!

Mrs. dleeny Posted:

Re: What do I do or is there anything I can do?

Posted by civic24ex

As far as extra material there should be plenty as it is being taken in. She lost 50lbs since ordering the dress. This is what the dress looks like. Maybe I am just dumb, but the lady told me A-line is flattering on all figures so I believed her as did my BM.


http://www.barijay.com/720.htm


if she lost 50 pounds, she might just have an image issue. She is clearly very hard on herself. Maybe you should offer to go with her to the store so you can see for yourself what it looks like. Maybe it's really not so bad and she is just having image issues.

Just a thought
Darcy Posted:

Re: What do I do or is there anything I can do?

I agree it may be an image issue. But I don't know what her size is or what she looks like. I would also say, if you believe it, that she looks great but if it is a really big issue, that you can try to alter the dress.

civic24ex Posted:

Re: What do I do or is there anything I can do?

Thanks everyone. I am going to call the bridal store and see if it can be made into a empire waist. Can't hurt to try.

LO13LO13 Posted:

Re: What do I do or is there anything I can do?

Posted by boobobunny

I wouldn't change the dress....this seems to more of her personal issue with herself....then it really is about the dress.


i agree!!
CPAPPAS Posted:

Re: What do I do or is there anything I can do?

i had the same issue...a-line doesn't necessarily mean loose fitting...I agree with the empire waiste....best way to go for larger sizes...see what they can do. Isn't this fun?


good luck...let us know what happens!
civic24ex Posted:

Re: What do I do or is there anything I can do?

Posted by CPAPPAS

i had the same issue...a-line doesn't necessarily mean loose fitting...I agree with the empire waiste....best way to go for larger sizes...see what they can do. Isn't this fun?


good luck...let us know what happens!


Loads of fun! I can't wait for the plannign part to be over!

Also I just mentioned to her (my BM) about trying to make it an empire waist and she says she doesnt think its possible. A call is worth a shot I think.
boobobunny Posted:

Re: What do I do or is there anything I can do?

I picked an empire dress...because 2 of my were bridemaids are trying to get pregnant....they bothed ordered extra length....so that if they are showing the seamstress can bring the waist line up and give their growing bellies more room....but I would not have picked this dress if my bridesmaids did not communciate their intentions with me.

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