What if you can't go to the wedding?

Dani00518 Posted: Apr 15, 2004 07:57 PM

What if you can't go to the wedding?

What would be an appropriate amount to send?

Kriss2c Posted: Apr 15, 2004 08:02 PM

Re: What if you can't go to the wedding?

I don't know what all the books say, but I think you give what you would have if could attend.

sarahthegreat Posted: Apr 15, 2004 08:34 PM

Re: What if you can't go to the wedding?

Posted by Dani00518

What would be an appropriate amount to send?

enough to cover your plate is the rule of thumb....but these days..almost anything goes

RedHead Posted: Apr 15, 2004 08:37 PM

Re: What if you can't go to the wedding?

I always feel the amount you spend has a lot to do with how close you are to the person getting married...So the price i would give if i didn't attend would vary.

marymoon Posted: Apr 16, 2004 11:31 AM

Re: What if you can't go to the wedding?

I agree it depends on how close you are to the person, and that's actually the etiquette rule according to Emily Post. Covering the cost of the plate is NOT the rule. People shouldn't be expected to pay for their dinnr. They're going to a party, they're giving a gift they feel is appropriate..so it depend son how close you are with the person. I'd give the same amount as if I were going.

Ang&Rich Posted: Apr 16, 2004 11:41 AM

Re: What if you can't go to the wedding?

I actually would not give the same amount as if I was going because the couple will not lose out on anything - it's two less plates they have to pay for.

If it's family or a really close friend I'd give $200. Otherwise $100 - $150. It depends on the situation - plus I would have to consider what they gave me if I already had a wedding or how they have been with other events. It may sound ridiculous to some but this is how I do it. If I don't like the person and can't figure out why they invited us they get nothing. Plain and simple.

AliKing Posted: Apr 16, 2004 11:42 AM

Re: What if you can't go to the wedding?

If its close friend/ family... same is if you were attending.

BMD'sPeanut Posted: Apr 16, 2004 11:47 AM

Re: What if you can't go to the wedding?

Posted by marymoon

I agree it depends on how close you are to the person, and that's actually the etiquette rule according to Emily Post. Covering the cost of the plate is NOT the rule. People shouldn't be expected to pay for their dinnr. They're going to a party, they're giving a gift they feel is appropriate..so it depend son how close you are with the person. I'd give the same amount as if I were going.

I agree with this 100%