The BMs will be paying for their dress and the shoes. Haven't thought about the hotel though. 4 of my 5 girls are from out of town - so I am not sure what I am going to do about the hotel situation - plus they are all married or have serious bf's so therefore I know they will all want their separate hotel rooms (they all don't know each other...well, not really. I have a pretty diverse bridal party). I might pay for their rooms the night before, but they will definitely be paying for their rooms afterwards. I will definitely be paying for their hair and makeup (I am including it as one of their presents) and I will also be very generous with the bridal party gifts. I am still up in the air about everything though...
Lsorrent
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Re: What should a BM pay?
Posted by debzy
In my opinion, that is A LOT to ask of the BMs. Why are you requiring them to stay at the hotel? If they have to stay at the hotel, the you should be paying for it. Same with hair and make up. If you don't want them to do it themselves, then you should pay for it. They should pay for their dresses, though.
The OP did say she was paying for them to stay in the hotel IF they stay in one of the two rooms she booked. I think it's reasonable to expect that if they want a separate room, they pay themselves. As for hair and makeup, anytime I've been a BM I've assumed I'd pay for it myself.
drivwal
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Re: What should a BM pay?
my girls are paying for their own dresses and hair and makeup. Three of the girls live on the island so they will be going home after the wedding most likely. One bridesmaid lives in OH and she's coming in for the wedding, she can get a hotel room or she can stay at my house or my sisters house if she likes...her choice. I think your gift of giving them a place to stay is very generous. I would get them their doj and call it a day for you....if you want to be extra generous, you can pay for their mani/pedi's.
mf2009
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Re: What should a BM pay?
I don't think it's unreasonable. I had a long conversation with my girls..all 11 of them... about what they should expect. I can not afford to pay for all their expenses but I was very generous with their gifts considering I had to buy 11 of them and I am also paying for their DOJ. They are also paying for the hotel rooms because the bridal party is too large for everyone to hopefully meet up the morning of. They are responsible for hair and makeup if they want it done professionally. But I made sure all of this was discussed BEFORE they made any commitment.
As the other girls said its a known thing to pay for your own expenses as a bridemaids. I would never expect a bride to pay for everything but I guess everyone is different.
AdriandSteve
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Re: What should a BM pay?
I think you're being very generous with what you are already doing.
Its2Snappy
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Re: What should a BM pay?
Thanks for all of your opinions. I wanted to make sure that I was being fair to my girls. I don't want to put unreasonable expectations on them. Now, on to BM dress shopping!
