Ok, so a billion years ago, way before I had a wedding in the works; I kinda (nonchalantly)promised someone I am friends with (not close friends) that she would be part of my Bridal party. Fast forward to now and I kinda just want my 2 cousins and my sister. Do I **** it up and let her be part of it? or do I tell her I'm only having family members? I feel really bad about it, but I didn't realize we were being serious when I said yes to her.
Im getting Married
Posted:
Member since
Re: what should I do?
Maybe she doesn't remember...or if she hasn't said anything yet I might throw out there that you are having a small BP with just your 2 cousins see what she says
Sorry I'm not much help
netsirk10
Posted:
Member since
Re: what should I do?
i honestly don't think it is a problem. as long as you are just having your bridal party be family members then i think she will understand and respect that. you really can not be held to a promise that was made a long time ago.
ellie424
Posted:
Member since
Re: what should I do?
If you really only want your cousins and sister, then I would not include your friend in your bridal party. You told her a while ago that you would have her in your BP, however, that was before you were involved in the wedding planning process. If you feel as though she thinks that you are going to ask her, then it's probably best to nonchalantly mention to her that you decided to only have family in your BP (just so she doesn't expect to be asked). I think that she will be understanding because it's not like you're having a bunch of other friends and not including her, you simply only want to have family now.
eta: You can have her involved in your day in other ways besides being in the bridal party. For example, if you are getting married in a church, you can have her do a reading. Or involve her in your wedding some other way.
HTH!
sandybeaches115
Posted:
Member since
Re: what should I do?
I think you should just be honest with her and say that you decided to only have your family in the BP...i think that is understandable. If you really want her to be in it then you can keep her in it...but if you are regretting it then you should do what makes you happy. her feelings may be a little bit hurt but i think it's totally understandably if you just wanted to keep it small and just have family members. she will get over it if she is your good friend and still come and have a great time at your wedding!! i know it's a sticky position to be in but you have to do what you really want to do.
Tromsugar2b
Posted:
Member since
Re: what should I do?
i kind of had a similar situation, the way i look at it is your bridesmaids dont neeed to be involved in everything! If your thinking about some aspects you maybe dont want to deal with them in, you dont have to! you can have your fam involved in what you want and the other bridesmaids when you see fit. If you think that your friend took it seirously then you should probably have her as a bm but like i said she dosent have to be part of everything if you dont want, just the day of- involved things!
JessNicole7EM
Posted:
Member since
Re: what should I do?
Unless she brings it up to you I doubt she'll just assume she's still in it.
Otherwise it's fine to say you're just having family - unless you end up adding someone not family you're fine.
FutureJOC
Posted:
Member since
Re: what should I do?
If you are keeping it family only, I don't think there would be any hard feelings abouot not asking her to be in it. I would say not to bring it up (possibility that she may not even remember). If she brings it up to you though, just explain to her that you discussed it with your FI and that you would like to keep the BP small and family only.
