(take into consideration that they live in PA and are very simple pple)
my future brother in law is getting married in 2 weeks. they have been dating for 6 years and jjustgot engaged this past xmas.....we were in shock, we expected them to skip the engagement and just go to the JOP and get married. well now they are having a small intimate immediate family only ceremony in 2 weeks. the week after they are having an 'open house party' thing as my fmil called it with 'antipasto salad and rigatoni and cake and pop'
personally i dont think they are taking us into consideration seeing as though they live 7 hrs away and to travel back and forth 2 weekends in a row for wedding stuff is alot for us especially that we are going back there for easter weekend for my shower there.
anyway my question is what should we give them as a gift? she isnt having a shower and they have a house but dont have much in it and i dont see them as 'entertaining' 'decorating' people. should we do a gift card to like bbb or target or just cash? he is our best man and she is a bridesmaid and i doubt they are gonna go overboard in giving us a gift.
i was thinking of getting them something sentimental with their wedding date and stuff on it but i just dont know.
help me decide!
kirstenjk
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Re: what should i give as a gift?
Why don't you give them a really nice engraved photo frame and a gift certificate to BBB or Target. That way they have a special wedding keepsake and can get something nice for their house.
You don't have to spend a lot of money - Things Remembered usually has some really nice engravable items.
GinaZ
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Re: what should i give as a gift?
I think a nice gift certificate will be fine. Maybe for like $50 or whatever you can afford. And I like the picture frame idea too!
alissa5517
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Re: what should i give as a gift?
Posted by kirstenjk
Why don't you give them a really nice engraved photo frame and a gift certificate to BBB or Target. That way they have a special wedding keepsake and can get something nice for their house.
You don't have to spend a lot of money - Things Remembered usually has some really nice engravable items.
I like this idea. It is the best of both.
anamaree77
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Re: what should i give as a gift?
well if they're coming to your shower and wedding, i'd take that into consideration and maybe spend a little more on them....also, remember that they are 'IN' your wedding which costs money too.
I'd say get something sentimental and do the rest in cash.
BoxOfRocks
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Re: what should i give as a gift?
I like the combination of the sentimental and the gift card or cash.
From the OP, it sounds like you are considering giving them a smaller gift because the wedding is modest. They're no less married than anyone who had a lavish wedding and the relative smallness of their wedding shouldn't be a factor in the size of the gift. Give what you can afford.
Since the traveling is going to be a hardship--yeah, three trips, two of which were unplanned--in the months before your wedding can be quite stressful. You and DH should work it out with your in-laws about what events to go to--although obviously it'd be ideal to go both weekends for his wedding. I'm a little surprised the PA wedding and party aren't on the same day.
ETA--clarification.
lwny427
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Re: what should i give as a gift?
I agree... something sentimental and then some cash. They are close relatives, so I wouldn't skimp on the gift giving because their reception is smaller.
Wifeynella
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Re: what should i give as a gift?
something small and sentimental is a great gift. a BBB or target gift card is more then enough
mRm2008
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Re: what should i give as a gift?
IMO something small to commemorate their union and then cash. I'm sure they will put it to great use.
MKEA98
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Re: what should i give as a gift?
I think something sentimental, like an engraved picture frame, and then cash, is the best way to go. Like others have said, just because they're not having a huge wedding, doesn't mean one should skimp on the gift. And like someone else said, they're both in your wedding, which will cost them more money. Basically, whatever you give them, you can probably expect back. I know you said you don't expect a lot from them in way of a gift, so I guess don't go crazy giving them a large amount of cash. But I still think you should give something decent. I think a gift certificate isn't the best gift to give for a wedding, no matter how small/modest the event is, JMO.
bears0524
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Re: what should i give as a gift?
thanks girls. i think i am going to get them an engraved picture frame and either cash or a gc to target or something. i think this will cover both ends.
Espo22
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Re: what should i give as a gift?
Posted by anamaree77
well if they're coming to your shower and wedding, i'd take that into consideration and maybe spend a little more on them....also, remember that they are 'IN' your wedding which costs money too.
I'd say get something sentimental and do the rest in cash.
very good point. The same way you will travel to her wedding and open house party, they will do the same for you and it is more expensive for them to come to ny then PA, especially if you have family there which im guessing you do since you are going there for your shower.
I wouldnt be upset that they didnt take you into consideration. Sometimes when planning these things we have to make things that make us happy, no matter what we do we cant make everyone happy and convenient for everyone. She should do what is right for her so dont be upset. I dont think anybody needs to plan anything around 2 people sorry dont mean it in a bad way. Sorry that you feel it is a burden but dont feel that way, instead of seeing it like that maybe be happy for her. And just bc theyve been together 6 years doesnt mean they have to do it at a JOP. Theres MANY brides on here that have been with their FH's for 9-10 years some less but even between the 6-10 years range and are having big weddings
I say give cash at the wedding and for the open house party a nice gift. Maybe something sentimental on her registry or glass set, plate set, something like that
I also dont think that bc a person is having a small wedding means they should get less, if youre close to them then they should get something special just for that reason. It shouldnt matter how small or lavish a wedding is.
heathermatt
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Re: what should i give as a gift?
i like the sentimential photo frame or something...
MsPotterhead
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Re: what should i give as a gift?
I would give them the same gift you would give if they were having a big wedding in a catering hall. I don't think where or how someone gets married should affect the gift. JMO.
