1. Women are not equipped to be mothers to infants by themselves and fathers are inept. No matter what your financial situation, emotional state or competence... mooch off your parents and insists they raise your children.
2. Comic books cause fear of commitment, pre-marital-sex and vehicular manslaughter.
3. Knowing and loving someone for decades still does not permit you to have sex if you are unmarried. If you're 19 and you meet and marry someone in an hour that's totally fine. Even though you're basically having sex with a stranger.
4. Church will save you. Especially if your parents don't go but force you into going because they can't be bothered to raise you themselves. Redemption is the same thing as emotional blackmail and incompetence.
5. People with massive eyebrows should not dance. It throws your eyebrows askew. Martin, I'm looking at you.
6. You can breastfeed a baby with your shoulder.
7. Teenage girls are road-whores with only sex on their minds. They will do anything to get it, including lying, sneaking around and threats.
8. It's perfectly acceptable to leave your young (and possibly developmentally-disabled) children unsupervised for long periods of time. Especially if you're ignoring them so that you can meddle, pry and snoop in the lives of your adult children and their spouses. Also, the young children you negelct should always be approached with nervous twitchiness and never disciplined.
9. Always welcome strangers into your house, especially if there is a new, uninnoculated infant there.
10. Nothing says 'I love you' like becoming a screechy, domineering tyrant of a matriarch who refuses to cut the apron strings and rules her family with fear and an iron fist.
P.S. When Vincent's parents showed up I totally thought they wanted him to go to church because he was gay and wanted to turn him straight.
P.P.S. Lucy isn't a bad mother... at least she hasn't eaten her young. Yet.
sarahthegreat
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Re: What the Camdens teach me every week...
Posted by MonkeyLuv
You are going to regret it!
Vincent, the plot contrivance of the week and Ruthie's next gay boyfriend, doesn't go to church because his parents never took him (a hallmark of horrible parents in the Cam-verse). He luuuuuuuurves comic books and superheroes and won't give them up for God!
RevCam explains that Simon had a comic book habit that led to running someone over with a car and *gasp* pre-marital sex!!!
I would like to point out comic books have a stronger moral compass than this travesty of a show. They are far more subtle than RevCam and his lectures, have better role models for girls than Annie/Lucy/Mary and are less morally ambiguous than any of its plot lines. Good usually triumphs over evil, salvation is possible but a difficult journey, and when evil wins it's a dark day.
Thank you!
you were just ITCHING to explain that, weren't you?? comic books will just lead you down the road to hell, thats the moral, huh? interesting. so reading is worse then anything in the cam-verse....
MonkeyLuv
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Re: What the Camdens teach me every week...
Posted by usuk2004
It seems to me when you have seven children of your own, your hands should be pretty full, and you should therefore leave everyone else's alone...
It's like Charles and Caroline Ingalls trapped in some sort of hyper-religious cult commune!
WORD!
Run while you still have a chance Devil-Stripper-Baby! Ruuuuuuun!
DebsNY
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Re: What the Camdens teach me every week...
Posted by MonkeyLuv
Another sinister, blonde teenage girl out to deflower the Faux Camden Children.
Okay - that one wins as my favorite quote of the week!
I love these recaps - i might cry when the show ends and thus ends these
Aga
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Re: What the Camdens teach me every week...
honestly, I almost threw my remote control at the tv watching last night's episode I thought it couldnt get any worse and yet it did
usuk2004
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Re: What the Camdens teach me every week...
Posted by MonkeyLuv
Run while you still have a chance Devil-Stripper-Baby! Ruuuuuuun!
Yep, and if he keeps sucking on that shoulder, before you know, he WILL be running. Yum, all those Camden nutrients will help him grow big and strong! Drink em up!
MonkeyLuv
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Re: What the Camdens teach me every week...
ew! Camden nutrients!!!
MrsTC
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Re: What the Camdens teach me every week...
OMG LOL.
I was cheering when Robo-Hubby finally stood up to the Hag and told her she (basically) better get off her *** and start doing stuff around the house....'most new mothers are busy cleaning and cooking AND taking care of a baby!' Go Robo-Hubby!
MrsTC
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Re: What the Camdens teach me every week...
Posted by shoppie
Lest we forget rev Cam's half-wit sister :)
she's definately good for providing some chuckles when she's on.
anyone seen or heard from HAPPY?
LOL I was wondering last night where Happy was too!
MonkeyLuv
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Re: What the Camdens teach me every week...
Posted by MrsTC
Posted by shoppie
Lest we forget rev Cam's half-wit sister :)
she's definately good for providing some chuckles when she's on.
anyone seen or heard from HAPPY?
LOL I was wondering last night where Happy was too!
Happy was with SamVid when they were opening the baby shower gifts! Probably preventing them from eating anymore paper... or waiting for them to turn the other way so she could lock her bitter, bitter jaws around their jugulars!
MrsTC
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Re: What the Camdens teach me every week...
You would have thought the Cams had taught SamVid manners....opening other people's presents
MonkeyLuv
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Re: What the Camdens teach me every week...
Posted by MrsTC
You would have thought the Cams had taught SamVid manners....opening other people's presents
Please! They would have to pay attention to them first to teach them manners! SamVid are like feral children!
marymoon
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Re: What the Camdens teach me every week...
OMG!
Janice
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Re: What the Camdens teach me every week...
those kids are prisoners to their room, and then last week those church ladies took their room away
MonkeyLuv
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Re: What the Camdens teach me every week...
Posted by Janice
those kids are prisoners to their room, and then last week those church ladies took their room away
See! See!! Feral children I tell you! And now, they are savage feral children without a room of their own! Next week they'll probably be peeing all over the CamPound in an attempt to mark their territory for the new baby!
Janice
Posted:
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Re: What the Camdens teach me every week...
Posted by MonkeyLuv
Posted by Janice
those kids are prisoners to their room, and then last week those church ladies took their room away
See! See!! Feral children I tell you! And now, they are savage feral children without a room of their own! Next week they'll probably be peeing all over the CamPound in an attempt to mark their territory for the new baby!
OMG the CamPound!! you are too much. I am surprised uncle ben has not stopped by yet.
