What turns you off when vendor shopping?

I've had vendors tell me that they're 'the best on Long Island', then they proceed to put down other successful vendors because they see them as competition! I'm not talking insults about their professional lives...I'm talking insults about how the person looks, where they live, their religious habits, etc. I was floored! Dude, it doesn't make you too appealing. I wonder what you say about brides that don't use you, and post about you on LIW?!?

I also can't stand when they try to sell me something I neither WANT, nor NEED. Contrary to what you may believe, Mr. Vendor, I don't have an extra $500 to give you just because you want the sale, so stop pushing!!! My FH actually walked out of a vendor meeting once because the vendor was so pushy.

And do they think we, as brides, enjoy it when a vendor (not even a LIW vendor!) tells us, 'Oh, I was expecting your call. I saw that you posted about [insert flowers/limos/photos here] on the 07 board.'?!?! IMO, this was the worst one! I know its a public forum and anyone can read the boards, but to TELL a bride that you were expecting her call? Weird!


Oh, AND- since when do vendors make an appt with you, confirm it the night before, then no-show for the appt?!? Yup, I've had that too.


Anyone have any similar experiences? This wedding biz is cutthroat!

Have any to add?

PUSHY vendors! Can't stand them at all!!!!

Especially bridal stores!!!! UGH!

gosh!!! I can't stand the pushiness... or the pretending that their not pushy...like saying, I don't have to push the sale.. this sells it self.. but book now because...blah blah blah!!!!!

The bridal salon girls are really the absolute worst. They really wear me out. I've just decided to not even listen when they're talking anymore.

The thing is these vendors see brides everyday. they know that few people want to make a decision on the spot.. so just let me sleep on it. every vendor choice is a couple thousand or more.. so why would i just walk in the door and plop that down? I mean.. they know this... its just so annoying... its like used car shopping!!

Dear Vendors:
We would trust you and your product more if you just told us why your product was the best and showed that you loved what you did and left the decision to us. If you have a great product, fair price and a passion for working with people, you will never be short of happy clients.
If you're pushy, people will always hesitate to book you or they'll book you w/out thinking and regret it later... either way you lose, because you will have an unhappy client in the end who does not appreciate your work!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I've only found 2 non pushy vendors and they are the ones i am going to book.. even though, as it turns out they might be a little more pricey than the rest.

Also, phyllis at gownfind is the queen of laid back- LOVE HER.

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Posted by billandme

PUSHY vendors! Can't stand them at all!!!!

Especially bridal stores!!!! UGH!

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I HATE the 'We'll give you this offer for today ONLY.' Listen pal (or bridal gown consultant, whatever you want to call yourself)...I'm an obsessive lunatic...the last thing you need on your hands is me second guessing my decision b/c I will drive you up the ******** wall. So shut up, stand by your offer and let me make a decision.

I also do not like vendors who think their product is just so far superior than all the others they turn their nose up and could just about keel over even thinking about you considering another vendor who does the same thing!

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Posted by billandme

PUSHY vendors! Can't stand them at all!!!!

Especially bridal stores!!!! UGH!

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Have to agree! If they are trying to get me to add something I don't want I'm outta there! Plus you have to have that vibe about them.

Thanks ladies for your advice, since I'm just starting to look at all my vendors now. I don't like pushy people either and it's my money afterall, so I need to spend it wisely. It doesn't grow on trees.

I find if I feel comfortable with someone, I'm more likely to choose them.

Happy planning ladies!!!

Vendors that bad mouth other vendors is the biggest turn off EVER. I also can't stand vendors that don't listen. Look buddy, I am the one with the money. If you don't give me what I want I am going to go elsewhere. So just sit down and LISTEN to me!

Wow! That felt good!!!

In the past year vendors have said to me 'oh you have so much time' or 'oh you're wedding is so far away' I HATE that. FH and I are having a long engagement mostly for monetary reasons, so if we feel at that time that we can book that vendor, then I dont want to hear it!!! It seriously erks me the wrong way.

One time I called a DJ and told him my date and he said something to this effect and I said oh I'm sorry I don't need an appointment with you!!!

What I hated MOST and really turned me off to vendors (specifically when shopping for my venue) was them treating me like THEY were doing ME a favor by me having my wedding there. One actually said 'Well, I can make more money off another party, so I really don't care if you book here.'

Thanks, I'll keep shopping until I find a place that WANTS my money.

Pushy vendors

Vendors that talk down to us like we're idiots.

Anyone I don't know calling me 'sweetheart' or any pet name

Vendors who give one price on the phone and a higher price in person... then lie and say they never gave you that other price over the phone.

ok this may take a while!

i HATE people in bridal shops that try to 'trick' you - as in. . . omg this dress may disappear TOMORROW. . .i also hate how they will only show you like 2 dresses . . . i mean maybe i look poor or something but is there a reason they dont want to help me? my favorite was 'hmm we dont have any dresses that arent strapless' OH YEAH? not a single one?!?!?!

i also hate when people talk money as in THEM losing money - i had a vendor tell me 'i am sorry i cant help you with such and such bc i would just be losing money on that' um sorry i dont really care if you are losing money you are a giant business and FH are struggling to pay for this all by ourselves! i walked right out of there!!

i havent had vendors knock other vendors yet. . . but that would annoy me too!

I had a vendor send me a sample CD of their string quartet- I wanted to hear the people in person and I emailed the vendor OVER AND OVER again asking the same question- 'Can I hear your quartet play?' and over and over again he would either write back dodging the question or not write back at all.

THEN, I get the CD in the mail and I'm thinking, 'OK, maybe I'll just book based on the CD'. It was three or four songs and just snippets of each song- nothing long and no full songs on the CD. The CD was homemade and you could tell it was very inexpensive- I mean, I understand why- it's a sample that you send out so why spend a lot on it? Well, I though this until I saw the 'PLEASE RETURN CD' in red along the side of the CD. I mean, c'mon buddy! The CD costs you next to nothing and you want me to pay postage to send it back when the postage is probably worth more than the CD itself?! I could almost see him wanting the CD back- OK, but send self addressed and stamped postage! I'm not paying postage so you can get your CD back- how cheap!!!

Then, I have the CD literally 24 hours and I get a typed, obviously mass-produced letter saying 'We have received another inquiry for your date'. SO predictable! And I'm sure he did receive another inquiry for a Sunday evening wedding when over a YEAR in advance for a String Quartet... totally believable!

So that was the biggest turn off besides the usual 'cheesy' vendors, the putting down of other vendors, the typical sales pitches of 'we're the best out there' and I hate to say it but I met with one vendor who did not speak English- and although I totally respect people coming to this country to live the American dream- if I can't understand you and you can't explain to me what I'm spending thousands on then how do you expect me to book you? I mean, c'mon- it's just not fair... the least they could do is provide a translator or someone I could speak to... They also told me that I could not meet the actual vendor who would be doing the services for my wedding- I had to meet with this person, who did not speak English, take his word for it when I did not understand him, sign and book- and then just 'wing it' until the day of my wedding and then I get to meet the vendor- when he shows up on my door the morning of my wedding? I think NOT! Especially when God knows if he speaks English too-- It was NOT good.

Some vendors:

And then there are others who are SO awesome, SO great, SO supportive and they almost feel like friends- I would INVITE them to the wedding if they were not doing it!! They are the ones I choose to focus on and rave about b/c they do the right thing and out-shine other vendors who don't do the right thing effortlessly.

I have to say that if they were pushy, I didn't go with that vendor. I had the 'I'm so great speech' from a photographer and we really loved his work. But then he through out the 'you better book now, because I only do blank amount of weddings a year'. ***, I guess with his very high prices he could only do so many wedding in one year and make really good money from it. Needless to say we didn't go with him and we love the photographer we did use for our wedding. And of course there is the dress store sales people - forget about it! Don't even get me started. 'Oh that dress looks beautiful on you', that's nice to hear, but not with every dress you try on. Who teaches them this crap!!! This isn't what we want to hear. Be honest and we will be much happier in the long run.

We went to a vendor that we were originally using (who didnt stop calling us). And then when we booked someone else they actually called our new vendor and yelled at them for taking THEIR customer.......COULD YOU IMAGINE!!!!!!

When I'm trying to compare vendors online, I really hate the whole 'call to inquire about pricing' thing. I can understand that prices are subject to change, but my experience is that if I have to call or email, they end up being WAY out of my range and it was a waste of my time to even inquire.

I really appreciate vendors who are at least willing to give a ballpark range for their services on their sites. It makes the preliminary decisions SO much easier.

over exaggerating and pushinesssss