So.....It was brought to my attention that FMIL asked FH about having children attend the wedding. Knew this was going to be a big issue. FH and I had discussed this in length and decided we were not going to do that. The children are more than welcome at the ceremony but after that, bye bye. We are planning a brunch for the next day and they will be more than welcome to attend. FH told his Mom about not having the kids at the wedding. I couldn't get much more out of him about her reaction.
Would you approach her or let it go for now?
Nrauch8191
Posted:
Member since
Re: What would you do????
I would let it go for now. Are they giving you money for the wedding??
What does FH decision on having kids there?
barbtony
Posted:
Member since
Re: What would you do????
They're not giving us any money, and I don't want them to.
FH and I both agreed no to a no kids policy.
Goldie39
Posted:
Member since
Re: What would you do????
I wouldn't approach her since it seems like he handled it already. It really doesn't matter what her reaction was, as long as she is aware of what the two of you want she can feel anyway towards it (can't control that). I agree with you on the no kids policy (except for kids in the BP). And since the two of u are paying for it you have final say.
JenBill61210
Posted:
Member since
Re: What would you do????
I wouldn't bring it up to her unless she says something to you about it, at which point you can explain to her that you've both decided that you would rather celebrate at your reception without the kids, and state that they are more than welcome at the brunch... they are not paying for it so its not like she can have a say- besides it is YOUR wedding, you do what you want!
Nrauch8191
Posted:
Member since
Re: What would you do????
Then I would leave it alone and let your FH deal with her. It is something you both agreed upon. She has no say. She is not the one who is getting married.
I wouldn't say anything.
barbtony
Posted:
Member since
Re: What would you do????
Thanks girls. We'll see what happens. I'm sure this drama isn't over yet - its only begining.
CristinanBen2010
Posted:
Member since
Re: What would you do????
If thats what you agreed and she's not contributing, too bad for her! I wouldnt approach her either
MrsL2010
Posted:
Member since
Re: What would you do????
I was in a similar situation to barbtony....FH and I decided no kids, but FMIL wanted us to invite them. I told FH to tell her that since she is not contributing and since it's my wedding, I can do what I want.
SummerBride10
Posted:
Member since
Re: What would you do????
Dont approach her or say anything unless she says something first. Its your wedding and if you're paying for it and decided no kids then there shouldnt be kids there.
shortiroc127
Posted:
Member since
Re: What would you do????
I wouldn't approach her about it...but if your FMIL is anything like my FMIL, she'll bring it up again to you in private. At that point speak freely.
Christine N Ralph
Posted:
Member since
Re: What would you do????
Due to past experience with the same situation- I would not say anything because I did and it caused a HUGE and totally unnecessary fight. Wait it out until the invitations go out and at that point write on the Adult Reception...thats all!
JoanneAndJustin
Posted:
Member since
Re: What would you do????
I'd also let it go. My motto: No Pay No Say. Or: Our Wedding Our Rules. All sets of parents seem fine with that so that part is pretty drama free.
My mom DOESN'T want kids at the wedding FHs mom is from OOT it's a moot point... yay!
JSG10506
Posted:
Member since
Re: What would you do????
I'd let it go for now, see if she says anything to you about it. I'd probably let your FH handle it since it is his mom and her issue, but if she approaches you about it, then discuss it with her
grrulz
Posted:
Member since
Re: What would you do????
i agree don't bring it up unless she mentions it and i think is up to you and FH..sometimes is better that children don't attend the wedding this is more of an adult affair everyone should understand that and is your wedding!!! remember that
barbtony
Posted:
Member since
Re: What would you do????
Thanks for all of your opinions. I know this isn't over though. I'll keep you posted - Let the fun & games begin!!!!
christine2010
Posted:
Member since
Re: What would you do????
who are the kids that she wants you to invite?? i think that makes a difference. this situation has been the root of alot of my problems. i have to invite 3 kids, they are my nieces & nephew. although i do want them there, all the RH i have looked at said kids are half price and get pasta with butter & chicken fingers & french fries. with that in mind at the places i have already looked half price has ranged from $70-$100. since my parents are paying for the RH, once we decide on a place they are going to fit that price because there is no way.
barbtony
Posted:
Member since
Re: What would you do????
Here's the deal. I'm having a FG, who is my BF's daughter and my goddaughter. My nephews, although they live in Florida, will be coming up with my sister and her husband. FH has 4 niece/nephews. All of these children are under 10. I have spoken with my BF and my sister. THEY would rather not have the kids there so that they can enjoy themselves. FMIL is inquiring about her grandchildren.
My FG will be leaving after the ceremony.
And my nephews will be leaving after the ceremony.
