What would you do?-hypothetical question

After reading the 'nightmare party' story it got me thinking. If your FH was at another mans party and then came home and told you he saw the future groom do something vial with a stripper/ another woman/ girl/ man/ animal <-- whatever. Would you want to tell the bride before her wedding what you knew? I don't know how I would feel. Would you really be doing her a favor?

I personally know a dirty secret about a now married friend of FH's (happened before they were married) and I would never tell his wife. I can't see anything good coming of it when they are so happy.

Hmmm....this is a tough one. I think it would depend on the relationship I have with the girl. Would she believe me over her man? would she pick a fight with me and cause a world of drama I don't need?

Sometimes its better to mind your own business, the girl might lose it so in some instances ignorance is bliss.

On the other hand, if I was the girl being lied to I would want someone to tell me the truth. I feel like a hypocrite saying that but like I said before, I think it really depends on the closeness of the relationship you have with the couple.

If he cheated do you really think he wouldn't do it again??How happy could living a lie be??



MOST importantly~
If it was your man wouldn't you want to know???

Hard i siutation.

I once dated a man for 8 months....until I finally found out he was engaged. I then told his wife (future wife at the time) one month b4 the wedding...WHY? I don't know. I was 25 at the time..I really, really liked this guy. I was seeing him 2-3 times a week. I met his sister & all. I could not believe he was engaged.

They got married & have a few kids now. He was from huntington & was in the Volunteer FD..anyone know anyone there? LOL
I wonder if they are still married?

I would mind my business.

FH and I have a friend or 2 who philander regularly. I know about it and wish I didn't, but it isn't my place to say.

Regardless of what I said, would I make it right?

My answer to myself is always no.

sad, but true.

this is a tough one but bc of past situations i dont know if i would say anything.

In the past ive seen quite alot of similar situations and sometimes telling the person is not always the best option. A friend of mine told another friend that her bf was cheating on her, well this girl fought with her bf at first but of course he had a ton of excuses and somehow got her to stay with him. After the situation it was uncomfortable for the 2 friends and the bf to hang out, it just couldnt be done. The boyfriend was upset that her friend ratted him out so he didnt want to be around her, there was tension if it did happen. Not only that but it seemed like the girlfriend was a bit upset that her friend even told her. She stayed with him regardless of what he did, but it was something she had to live with and seemed like she preferred if she never knew, plus she hated that others knew her bf cheated on her and felt stupid in front of others. Its funny but sometimes when you tell somebody they can hate you for it. Then if they stay together it puts you in an awkward position.

I also had another situation where i saw someones bf with another girl. I was warned by others who were close friends with her not to even bother telling her bc she wont believe it and that her bf can say anything to her and she would believe it. This wasnt someone i was close to so i kept my mouth shut. Problem is that i told 1 person and word got around and then about 2 months later somebody told her. This girl was so naive bc she took it out on me instead of believing what i saw. She wanted to ask me about it right away, i said that i had no intentions of her knowing and sorry that somebody told her. She then told a friend whom im very close to that i am probably lying and just want to break ppl up and started saying nasty things about me. She then wanted to talk to me in person and again i told her what i saw. It turned into a circus i wished i was never part of. She confronted her bf about it, and one day i get a phone call from him, i had missed the call but got the message, he then called again about an hour later and i picked up. He calls me all mad and trying to test me out and question me now i knew his gf was on the other line he asked me what kind of car did he drive bc if i saw him i would know this, so i answered right away and infact even said about what year the car was bc my friend had the same car. He said well thats a lucky guess a 1993 ford taurus is a lucky guess he then said ok then what color is it and i answered that question and again answered right, he at that point didnt know what to say. I was so annoyed that he called me questioning it that i even said, and i can tell you exactly who you were with, the thing is that another girl i was with when i saw him with another girl knew the girl and her name. When i said who it was, what day i saw him, what time and what he bought bc we were in a store he realized i guess exactly when this was so he kept his mouth shut and just hung up. The girl still was naive and didnt want to believe it and said she would take him back. Yeah the funny part is that he broke up with her and said he didnt want to be with her anymore and she was begging him back. I was so upset that she thought i would lie about anything like this bc i dont want her with her bf, like i honestly cared. Even when her friends whom im close with told her that i would never do such a thing she still talked sh*t.

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Posted by Nurse12985

After reading the 'nightmare party' story it got me thinking. If your FH was at another mans party and then came home and told you he saw the future groom do something vial with a stripper/ another woman/ girl/ man/ animal <-- whatever. Would you want to tell the bride before her wedding what you knew? I don't know how I would feel. Would you really be doing her a favor?

I personally know a dirty secret about a now married friend of FH's (happened before they were married) and I would never tell his wife. I can't see anything good coming of it when they are so happy.

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If it were me, I would want to know. People don't change -- or I should say very few people change. If he's a cheating piece of crap, it's better I know BEFORE the wedding.

scary thought. If this girl was not a close friend of mine, I'd probably mind my own business and trust that she should already know the man that she has promised to spend the rest of her life with. I know I'd feel guilty though for not warning her.
However, if it WAS a close friend of mine or a family member then I'd definitely say something! She needs to know the truth. I agree with what some others said. He only gets one chance. If he cheated before the wedding, what would ever stop him from cheating afterwards? It's ridiculous. I would wanna know if it was me. It would hurt like hell, but better I find out before I'm legally bonded to the cheater.

very scary question ... i would want to know ... but the truth is i would never tell a friend unless she was a very close friend who trusted me and would believe me. i would never tell someone who was just a friend or someone that i havent known a long time. butttt my best friends ... of course i would tell them! i would never want them to marry someone who could do something like that to them! ...

ok here comes my own opinion: that is why FH and i decided no strippers, stip clubs , dancers or anything like that ... why put yourself in that situation in the first place ... not only for FH but for all his guy friends!

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ok here comes my own opinion: that is why FH and i decided no strippers, stip clubs , dancers or anything like that ... why put yourself in that situation in the first place ... not only for FH but for all his guy friends!

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I agree completely. Me and FH also agreed on that same thing. We'll have our separate parties, but it'll only include friends having fun, getting a few drinks, stuff like that. There will be no strippers or anything related to that WHATSOEVER. I'm glad I found myself a respectful man like that who shares the same values as I. To me a 'last night of freedom' just doesn't sound right.

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Posted by Nurse12985

After reading the 'nightmare party' story it got me thinking. If your FH was at another mans party and then came home and told you he saw the future groom do something vial with a stripper/ another woman/ girl/ man/ animal <-- whatever. Would you want to tell the bride before her wedding what you knew? I don't know how I would feel. Would you really be doing her a favor?

I personally know a dirty secret about a now married friend of FH's (happened before they were married) and I would never tell his wife. I can't see anything good coming of it when they are so happy.

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good one...well i must admit that i have seen cheaters in action! 2 days before they were married and i said nothing...BUT...in my defense...there is an explanation. Unless it is a close girlfriend of mine I see as none of my business! people cheat EVERYDAY and its deiscgusting but honestly most of those cheaters are regular cheaters and if the other person is too dumb or blind to see it....i am not going to get in the middle....unless of course its a dear friend. does that make sense?

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Posted by Sweets14

MOST importantly~
If it was your man wouldn't you want to know???

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that's my question. i'd want to know. i'd also feel like a stooge going through life being the one who didn't know.

I don't know what I would do.

1 - if someone sent me an e-mail like that I wouldn't believe it. I trust my FH. I'm even encouraging him to go to a strip club for his party but he says he hates those places.

2 - If I knew a groom had a wild bachelor party, I would keep it to myself. I firmly believe that 'boys will be boys', and it is not my place to butt in. Call it a cop out, but the groom is a big boy.

3 - If I knew the groom was having an affair, then i would tell the woman. I wouldn't send her a sneaky e-mail and make her crazy. I would tell her flat out what I heard, and ask her to not mention my name when confronting her husband.

What 'nightmare party' story? Was it from fitchc about the wedding's two weeks away, etc? I must have missed this.
I don't know what I would do. It depends if it was a good friend or not. I probably wouldn't say anything.

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Posted by MaggieLuvsJoe

Hmmm....this is a tough one. I think it would depend on the relationship I have with the girl. Would she believe me over her man? would she pick a fight with me and cause a world of drama I don't need?

Sometimes its better to mind your own business, the girl might lose it so in some instances ignorance is bliss.

On the other hand, if I was the girl being lied to I would want someone to tell me the truth. I feel like a hypocrite saying that but like I said before, I think it really depends on the closeness of the relationship you have with the couple.

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I think the same way.