For the e-party? It started out the FH and I were doing it and his mom was doing invitations and centerpieces...NOW it has become they want to pay for the whole thing. I appreciate they want to do this for us, it is such a nice and helpful gesture. I just want things a certain way (ok so what, maybe im a control freak ) and am afraid I will have no say over anything at all and end up being a guest at my own party... Am I overreacting to this whole thing??
menc
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Re: who pays??
Well why don't you see how it goes first and be honest. If she is getting too pushy and doing things w/o your input then tell her. Just b/c they are paying for it doesn't mean they get to plan the whole thing/ Although a lot of times when they give it to you they do the planning just like they would a shower. I planned mine and my parents paid for it. Just give them a chance and see what happens. Don't freak yet.
emomma17
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You are lucky you have these problems! We are paying for everything on our own so just see if you can work with her on the plans.
JKFris09
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my parents are paying for our e-party
davenjess
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I have to be honest & say LET THEM PAY FOR IT!!!!!!!!
You are a very lucky girl to have an offer like that and should jump on it. Of course, let them know you'd still like to plan it - but let them have a little say in things that aren't 100% important to you.
When it comes time for the wedding - you may wind up kicking yourself that you spent all that money on an e-party when your parents had offered to pay...
rocketsummer17
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Thanks girls! I knew I could count on you for a honest opinion!!
Future Mulligan
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we paid for about half of the eparty just so we could have one.....we did most of the planning - id take them up on the offer - its really generous and if they can afford it, i would let them! i wish we didnt have to spend any $$ but I am glad we had a party so to me it didnt matter......but its always nice if its for free!! and i am a total control freak too - and everything turned out ok LOL
LB and DC
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IMO - let them pay for the e-party and do it how they want (within reason). you will get to plan the wedding that way - and if they give you any issues then you can say, well, i let you plan the e-party!
stickymartini
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We couldnt afford to have an engagement party and pay for our wedding so if you want to have one...take them up on the offer!! It really nice of them to offer to do that for you guys. (and I've heard you can make out like a bandit) If your worried about her getting carried away and not keeping your tastes in mind then maybe you could offer to give her some 'ideas to help make her planning easier'.
AS
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Re: who pays??
The parents pay
melonhead
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Posted by rocketsummer17
....am afraid I will have no say over anything at all and end up being a guest at my own party... Am I overreacting to this whole thing??
ours is sunday in his mom's backyard with a tent and caterers and everything, paid for by FMIL, who neither FH or i are particularly close with... so, i am ending up a guest at my own party and i'm dreading it. i know nothing else about it. and i don't want FH to know how much i'm dreading it.
in my head, the biggest thing i'm over reacting about, is that FMIL had once mentioned it would be nice to use my wedding colors, which i really DON'T want, and if she did, i will be secretly very very mad.
good luck to you, and please send me some....
Dougs Girl
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My parents paid for ours.
MrsBrags7706
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Honestly, I've seen it go all 3 ways: Groom's parents pays for it - Brides parents pays for it - Couples pay for it!
Mine, in particular, my in-laws paid for it. ::sigh sigh:: ::grunt grunt::
yelley77
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I'm a lucky girl, my mother paid for it and FH's parents chipped in with the last minute stuff. SInce my mom paid, her and I planned the whole thing.
november152008
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our parents are splitting it half and half....so they did the list his parents did his side my father and me did my side...210pp invited
and i have my say on the decorationing i picked the favors i picked the invitations and all the little odds and ends...it is this december so we will see how it goes im excited for it to be here already....
ratherbealeper
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i didnt have an eparty or anything, but honestly, you SHOULD be a guest at this party.... I always thought of e-parties as a way for the parents to announce and celebrate with one another.
Seriously, its not a mini-wedding, let them pay for it and sit back and enjoyu sharing your new engagement with eveyrone there
jgl
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there is no rule as to who pays anything anymore haha..
but my parents and his parents split the eparty. and my FMIL paid for the flowers. I am very fortunate!! But i was lucky as well that they let me do things the way i wanted. esp my FMIL she told me jsut to tell her what I wanted for flowers and she would pay.
tricia3381
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my inlaws paid for mine. yes mil did most the planning which worried me but in the end everything turned out great.
GinaZ
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Im not sure who traditionally pays for it. Maybe everyone can put towards it to make it more simple?
