I hope I don't get bad luck for saying this, but I was SHOCKED when I got a letter from my church (where I plan to be married) that I need to pay $750! This is NOT including the organist (an extra $200) and the cost of the sexton and cantor (another $100). This is IN ADDITION to the $500 I donated last year. How are people supposed to afford this?? Obviously, I guess I have to just pay, but this was a shock I was NOT AT all aware of!
Espo22
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Re: Whose church also wants a VERY large donation??
our church asked for a $600 donation. I didnt really mind at all, i mean compared to the cost of the rest of the wedding its really nothing. Girls will drop 1k and higher on anything wedding related but complain when having to give it to the church. As a whole, its a very small cost of your wedding and actually its the most important part and whole point of the day. Plus it goes towards something helpful
bridej9
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Re: Whose church also wants a VERY large donation??
Yeah, ours is a total of about $800 including $200 for a singer - the catch - we are bringing our own! Our priest let us know that the cost is still 'suggested'
Aug07OFCbride
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Re: Whose church also wants a VERY large donation??
it seems like churches usually say suggested but really its kinda like you have to, no? ...not saying that its not worth it.
RockysGirl
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Re: Whose church also wants a VERY large donation??
wow, so far my church hasn't asked for anything!! Well, it's my home church which I am a member of, so i kinda think that's why i'm not being charged. I will, however, still give the Pastors something. But I don't think they have any 'suggested' amount. It's just whatever we feel. (I think it'll depend on how much i HAVE. lol)
angels914
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Re: Whose church also wants a VERY large donation??
We are getting married in our Church that we belong to ...and the other day when I was on the phone with the pastor I asked him about this ...and he told me that it will be $600 and that includes the music !!!!!!!! I am an active member of the Church , and I even teach Religion classes too .... so they get a lot of money out of me .... I don't mind paying it since this is where we want to be married !!!!!!!!
Kricket212
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Re: Whose church also wants a VERY large donation??
I am getting married at a Greek Orthodox church & ours was half of what you girls are suggesting.....I think it's very high but what can you do?
Espo22
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Re: Whose church also wants a VERY large donation??
Posted by RockysGirl
wow, so far my church hasn't asked for anything!! Well, it's my home church which I am a member of, so i kinda think that's why i'm not being charged. I will, however, still give the Pastors something. But I don't think they have any 'suggested' amount. It's just whatever we feel. (I think it'll depend on how much i HAVE. lol)
have you asked though. WE got married at the church dh was baptised in, did confirmation, communion, was an altar boy and his mom is in the choir and we still paid donation. Maybe your church is different when it comes to the whole donation thing. Is it a catholic church?
kristin597
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Re: Whose church also wants a VERY large donation??
We paid the fee. At first I was like, wow thats kind of high. Just because I didnt expect it from the church. But in the grand scheme of things, it is one of he cheaper things you will pay for and it is, IMO, the most important. Also, I don't know if its like this in any other churches but my Deacon made it clear that if we couldn't 'swing' the suggested donation that they would work with us.
FallBride2010
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Re: Whose church also wants a VERY large donation??
Posted by Smiley22
I hope I don't get bad luck for saying this, but I was SHOCKED when I got a letter from my church (where I plan to be married) that I need to pay $750! This is NOT including the organist (an extra $200) and the cost of the sexton and cantor (another $100). This is IN ADDITION to the $500 I donated last year. How are people supposed to afford this?? Obviously, I guess I have to just pay, but this was a shock I was NOT AT all aware of!
This does seem pretty high. I know the church is the least expensive thing...but $1500 seems a bit much. I agree with you!!
Maria31
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Re: Whose church also wants a VERY large donation??
I think mine is just $750.. don't you love how they call it a 'donation'?? If it was a 'donation', we should be able to choose the amount to give...
MrsBtobe2009
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Re: Whose church also wants a VERY large donation??
Our church asked for 1,000 if you weren't a parishioner sp?? Since we were, it is 'only' 780. It is crazy I know.
WinterBride10
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Re: Whose church also wants a VERY large donation??
Posted by Maria31
I think mine is just $750.. don't you love how they call it a 'donation'?? If it was a 'donation', we should be able to choose the amount to give...
Well, at least you can write it off since they call it a 'donation'. If you can't afford what they 'suggest' then you can speak to them and give what you can, but they won't budge if they know you are spending over 10K for a wedding...and I'm sure 95% of us a spending more than 10K on our weddings.
I understand some of you are saying this is the most important part of the wedding, but it is also only 45 minutes of the day!!!! And most churches are so strict with rules for vendors. I can't throw flowers in the church or anything outside. I can't have an aisle runner, they have rules for the limos, photographers can't use their own light and videographers can't film in certain parts of the church. I just think it's crazy how much a church requests.
Back in the day it was FREE or maybe $100 at most....I think it's absurd how much they charge, but that's just my opinion.
Espo22
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Re: Whose church also wants a VERY large donation??
Posted by brideinstride
Posted by Maria31
I think mine is just $750.. don't you love how they call it a 'donation'?? If it was a 'donation', we should be able to choose the amount to give...
Well, at least you can write it off since they call it a 'donation'. If you can't afford what they 'suggest' then you can speak to them and give what you can, but they won't budge if they know you are spending over 10K for a wedding...and I'm sure 95% of us a spending more than 10K on our weddings.
I understand some of you are saying this is the most important part of the wedding, but it is also only 45 minutes of the day!!!! And most churches are so strict with rules for vendors. I can't throw flowers in the church or anything outside. I can't have an aisle runner, they have rules for the limos, photographers can't use their own light and videographers can't film in certain parts of the church. I just think it's crazy how much a church requests.
Back in the day it was FREE or maybe $100 at most....I think it's absurd how much they charge, but that's just my opinion.
i understand what you are saying and its true that its only a short period of time compared to the whole day but its also the one thing that will actually make you married which lasts a lifetime, or lets hope hahaha. And they have rules now only bc past brides have sued them when someone slipped on an aisle runner. BUT its also about what you said in the beginning, girls are spending 30k or more for weddings and then to complain about $500-600 they would probably look at you like 'well you dont have a problem spending 2k on a dress, or even paying 600 on a headpiece, veil or anything like this' girls will pay $800 for a cigar roller, and many extras that are not necessary. Also remember that if a church didnt get donations then there wouldnt be churches for us to get married at.
BUt i have to say my church had no rules. I was able to use an aisle runner, rose petals, they even told me to let the photographers and videographer know they can come early to set up and they are free to do what they want and to let them know they can use the upper level where the choir usually sings to set up. So not all churches are that strict, we had no rules
RockysGirl
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Re: Whose church also wants a VERY large donation??
Posted by Espo22
Posted by RockysGirl
wow, so far my church hasn't asked for anything!! Well, it's my home church which I am a member of, so i kinda think that's why i'm not being charged. I will, however, still give the Pastors something. But I don't think they have any 'suggested' amount. It's just whatever we feel. (I think it'll depend on how much i HAVE. lol)
have you asked though. WE got married at the church dh was baptised in, did confirmation, communion, was an altar boy and his mom is in the choir and we still paid donation. Maybe your church is different when it comes to the whole donation thing. Is it a catholic church?
no, i haven't asked yet but i do have a few friends who have been married in my church before me (one in particular will have her wedding there in a couple weeks - 2 months before mine) and I've asked them about it. They said there was no amount, just however much you feel to give (kinda like how a tip works, i suppose). I'm gonna find out how much they each did and estimate MY donation around that. I definitely don't think my church has a suggested amount though. I don't even think that they allow weddings in our building unless you're a member (it's a small non-denominational church).
Espo22
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Re: Whose church also wants a VERY large donation??
Posted by RockysGirl
Posted by Espo22
Posted by RockysGirl
wow, so far my church hasn't asked for anything!! Well, it's my home church which I am a member of, so i kinda think that's why i'm not being charged. I will, however, still give the Pastors something. But I don't think they have any 'suggested' amount. It's just whatever we feel. (I think it'll depend on how much i HAVE. lol)
have you asked though. WE got married at the church dh was baptised in, did confirmation, communion, was an altar boy and his mom is in the choir and we still paid donation. Maybe your church is different when it comes to the whole donation thing. Is it a catholic church?
no, i haven't asked yet but i do have a few friends who have been married in my church before me (one in particular will have her wedding there in a couple weeks - 2 months before mine) and I've asked them about it. They said there was no amount, just however much you feel to give (kinda like how a tip works, i suppose). I'm gonna find out how much they each did and estimate MY donation around that. I definitely don't think my church has a suggested amount though. I don't even think that they allow weddings in our building unless you're a member (it's a small non-denominational church).
well from what i know, its usually a catholic church that asks for a donation in a certain amount so thats why. I am christian orthodox and they dont ask for this. Obviously Dh is catholic so thats why i did get married in a catholic church.
RockysGirl
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Re: Whose church also wants a VERY large donation??
Posted by Espo22
well from what i know, its usually a catholic church that asks for a donation in a certain amount so thats why. I am christian orthodox and they dont ask for this. Obviously Dh is catholic so thats why i did get married in a catholic church.
oh, ok. that makes sense
JennyAPH
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Re: Whose church also wants a VERY large donation??
My church didn't say it was a donation.. they actually gave us a price list that said 'Required Church Fees'.. totally almost 1k!
RockysGirl
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Re: Whose church also wants a VERY large donation??
Posted by gporka23
My church didn't say it was a donation.. they actually gave us a price list that said 'Required Church Fees'.. totally almost 1k!
Did that price include the officiant, or is that JUST the building fee?? What denomination is it? That seems like an awful lot of money, in my opnion
DrWho
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Re: Whose church also wants a VERY large donation??
Getting married at RH: $500. And they actually have to do something for the money, like set up chairs and tulle and all that crap. I'll admit I now think organized religion is a scam. Having grown up in the RC church, I'm still appalled that you have to pay sooo much money to receive a sacrament. I understand paying the musicians, and even the officiant, but if you've been handing over your envelope every week for a decade, it's your church and you should be able to use the building.
