I was chatting with a friend from college over the phone last night about wedding travel arrangements and she said that another of our friends was talking about having all of our friends fly in the day before for the RD. The only thing is that they are not invited to the RD. I know that some people invite all OOT guests to the RD but we simply cannot afford that since we will be having a lot of people flying in from out of town. I didn't know what to say to that.
Are we rude for not inviting all the OOTers to the RD? I feel bad but seriously, maybe you should wait til you are invited before you book flight arrangements? GRRRRRR
Ms2Mrs09
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Re: WHY MUST PEOPLE ASSUME THINGS
No I don't think you are rude at all. The RD should be for the bridal party and immediate family.
KerriJohnS
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O wow! Did you tell your college friend that? You could just politely say that you are doing a very small RD. and if they want to get together afterwards that is fine. You can tell them it's to cut costs and keep it intimate... and then appologize and say you didn't realize they wanted to come in so early. IDK.. I think that is how I would handle it. But I haven't been through it.
Dani777
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No, it's not rude at all. I would let them know before the book anything so they will at least have a heads up.
krislee316
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Posted by KerriJohnS
O wow! Did you tell your college friend that? You could just politely say that you are doing a very small RD. and if they want to get together afterwards that is fine. You can tell them it's to cut costs and keep it intimate... and then appologize and say you didn't realize they wanted to come in so early. IDK.. I think that is how I would handle it. But I haven't been through it.
this is perfect thats how I would handle it also. People ar sooooooooo rude
MrsList09
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I don't think you're rude. We're not inviting out of towners either. With the cost of weddings these days, it's impossible to invite all of the OOT guests!
pandafish519
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i don't think you're rude at all. we are only doing our BP, parents and readers from the wedding.
alli3131
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I am not having all our OOT guests at the RD and my entire family is from out of town. I am only having the people in the wedding and grandparents and like 2 others that are super close to us.
MLAngelo
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If we invited our OOT guests we would have two weddings.
Do you know that they expected to be invited? We have gone to college friends weddings and flown in or drove in the night before to meet up with all our college friends and go out to dinner together. Not at the RD with the bride and groom, just with each other. Maybe that is their plan? Its a good chance for some extra reunion time.
gina409
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Posted by pandafish519
i don't think you're rude at all. we are only doing our BP, parents and readers from the wedding.
same here!
littlepixie12
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Posted by MLAngelo
If we invited our OOT guests we would have two weddings.
Do you know that they expected to be invited? We have gone to college friends weddings and flown in or drove in the night before to meet up with all our college friends and go out to dinner together. Not at the RD with the bride and groom, just with each other. Maybe that is their plan? Its a good chance for some extra reunion time.
I agree .. .it is expensive. But to be fair, according to Emily Post the RD is supposed to be for OOT and BP/Family.. I didnt want to invite our OOT guests but FH insisted!!! Thankfully, we dont have THAT many, but we have enough that its going to be insane
FutureMrsM
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Posted by Ms2Mrs09
No I don't think you are rude at all. The RD should be for the bridal party and immediate family.
I totally agree... We have tons of people coming in from OOT (paris, canada, florida, nebraska, new Jersey etc.) we're not iviting everyone to the RD either...
ace730
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Posted by littlepixie12
Posted by MLAngelo
If we invited our OOT guests we would have two weddings.
Do you know that they expected to be invited? We have gone to college friends weddings and flown in or drove in the night before to meet up with all our college friends and go out to dinner together. Not at the RD with the bride and groom, just with each other. Maybe that is their plan? Its a good chance for some extra reunion time.
I agree .. .it is expensive. But to be fair, according to Emily Post the RD is supposed to be for OOT and BP/Family.. I didnt want to invite our OOT guests but FH insisted!!! Thankfully, we dont have THAT many, but we have enough that its going to be insane
Unfortunately Emily Post is not paying for the RD. lol
Jayla127
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I would just come straight out and tell them. No need to beat around the bush. If their are not invited why would you book a flight. Unless they just want to come and share in your joy and spend time with you before your wedding just because.
jennaandguy09
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You're not obligated to invite OOTer's to the RD...I would say if you're not going to invite them, try to organize something at a friend or relatives house where there will be mingling, maybe some drinks and stuff to pick on, and then get together with everyone after the RD to catch up.
allegracristina
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Re: WHY MUST PEOPLE ASSUME THINGS
Posted by littlepixie12
I agree .. .it is expensive. But to be fair, according to Emily Post the RD is supposed to be for OOT and BP/Family.. I didnt want to invite our OOT guests but FH insisted!!! Thankfully, we dont have THAT many, but we have enough that its going to be insane
I think you were separated from my mother at birth!!
